To be disappointed that my mom's husband donated things I would have loved

[Kate8889]

My mom husband (I was 23 when they met so don't see him as a father figure) recently donated a big box of video games, consoles etc, I saw it in a box in the garage. I have always wanted to have a video game system but have never been able to afford one.

I asked my mom if I could possibly have some of the items and she said no, these were specifically going for donation to be dropped off at a local store.

I asked if I could possibly buy with a discount, also told no, that there are things that remind him of a past relationship and he doesn't want to see them when he visits my house.

Odd that an adult with their own home and kids has always wanted a games console but could never afford one? It's a pretty standard purchase.

Go to the shop and buy it

I have done this before. I have donated items to a charity shop that are a painful reminder of really awful times. Things that other people might think are really insignificant.

It could be that your Mum's husband has a similar feeling towards these items and just didn't want to see them ever again (even though you might have been able to make use of them).

Some people are just like this. My MIL was downsizing, and didn't offer us any of the stuff she was getting rid of - Stressless leather chair, family heirloom oak desk, FILs nearly new PC, etc that we would have loved. Her cleaner asked for them and then no doubt flogged them on ebay ( she's got form). We did however get asked to go round and dispose of all the actual junk that was left.

I would rent or borrow some of the games and a console to be playing / have in the background / out for him to see when he comes around on his rare visit.

I personally would have gone NC with my mother for allowing her dh to treat me so poorly

If she won’t protect you or help you then there isn’t really any point in her having a relationship with her

He sounds like a very stupid set in his ways man. I wouldn't be surprised if he's basically impervious to anything your mother says to him.