Boyfriend has described himself as “pussy whipped”

[StrawberrySourpatchKids]

I don’t know if im just being extra sensitive because im on my period and feeling crap in general, so I want some perspective.

my boyfriend and I have been together for about four months. We’re both 26. He’s sent me a screenshot of a conversation he was having with one of his friends this evening, where he agrees with his friend who says he’s “pussy whipped” and he shoots back and basically says the sex is so good I can have whatever I want.

this entire exchange has just made me feel really
grossed out, because I think that’s something I wouldn’t discuss with anyone else. AIBU to feel like this?

Yes... the mocking is of the man...

Yes, implying it's humiliating to be dominated by his wife on the threat implicitly of withheld sex. Why does that make it a positive thing to say?

As I said, it means the women is so desirable that she has free reign to do whatever she wants. I would have thought that this is a desirable status to have.

In my case, people barely speak to me because I'm regarded as someone who can't offer anything to them. Basically, the opposite of his girlfriend.

You are making things up. Nowhere was attraction mentioned.

“Desirable status” does not mean “intensely attracted to. Nor did he say she is highly desirable.

And you it’s not a great thing to be reduced to a sexual object.

No it’s not indicative of that by in the slightest. People have sex with people they are are not attracted to everyday.

I am amazed at people trying to justify this.

I have never ever heard of this phrase being used in any way but negatively. It suggests that the woman is bossy/demanding/high maintenance/all of the above and the man has no backbone and will do as he is told. The sitcom image of the brash woman shouting orders and the mousey man saying "yes dear" and running around to her whim. The comments about sex are so ick inducing I wouldnt be able to look at him again, much less touch him.

It implies that any man who has a respectful give-and-take relationship is weak as he isnt the big man who is in charge and puts "his" woman in her place.

There is no way at all that this can be twisted to be a good thing.

Yes, I heard it first from rabid Meghan-haters who kept saying Harry was whipped. It's very rarely used positively, if at all.

You don't owe him anything, you've been together 4 months. Get rid and be alone, it's better than putting up with that for a day longer than you have to. And your intuition is right, that expression is utterly vile and disrespectful.

It implies that any man who has a respectful give-and-take relationship is weak as he isnt the big man who is in charge and puts "his" woman in her place.

what's the betting he's been filling his pea-brain with garbage and filth from Andrew Tate and his cronies

No they don't. How would that be possible? Man has to feel attraction for the woman for certain things to function correctly.

@JHound “Desirable status” does not mean “intensely attracted to. Nor did he say she is highly desirable.

I don't really understand what you're trying to say, or where you're going with this. It's really bizarre to try to argue that when sex with a specific woman is amazing, then that specific woman isn't necessarily desirable. I suspect you aren't sure what your point is either.

Oh you dear sweet naive thing. What those kind of men find attractive is a woman prepared to say yes, that will be enough for an erection.

As Harry said to Sally......Women need a reason to have sex, men just need a place.

Hmm..not sure. I've heard of gay men who forced themselves to sleep with women by imagining she was a man.

I have (through my job) come across more than a few men who have said that they dont particularly like a woman in terms of personality or anything else, but that she will do sexual things with him that other women wont do. So they will shag the woman who is "up for anything" but string them along rather than have a relationship with them.

Or as a vile man at my current job put it "we fuck the filthy ones and marry the nice ones"

@PyongyangKipperbang Or as a vile man at my current job put it "we fuck the filthy ones and marry the nice ones"

I'm not sure why the men you know are having these conversations in work. That's really weird. Anyway...

These qualities are not mutually exclusive. A partner can be sexual but also be nice.

In terms of being strung along by a man who has other options... well, then don't approach those men for relationships...

Are you serious? There’s plenty of men out there who would shag a stray dog if it stood still long enough.

Many men don’t need any attraction at all to a woman other than her being willing.

I’m not naive enough to think that men don't use phrases like this in their conversations with other men. But to screen shot it and share it with you? He needs to learn to read the room.

You think this is funny? Your standards are on the floor.

No "pussy whip" here but he and his friend are definitely cock slapping each other.

🙄🙄🙄 I think i have approached the issue reasonably based on the op

So he said something dumb. If its an isolated incident, whats the point in getting super worked up over it, just a clear 'thats dickish, please don't speak about me like that' will suffice

Your standards for being reasonable are on the floor.

🤣 👏

lol.

@TwistedWonder There’s plenty of men out there who would shag a stray dog if it stood still long enough.

Now you're just resorting to making stuff up that's clearly not correct and has no basis in reality. There is no evidence that attraction to dogs is common among men.

Many men don’t need any attraction at all to a woman other than her being willing.

Of course men need attraction, otherwise they wouldn't want to have sex... what you're saying makes no sense.

As long as he's not normally this vulgar...(and stupid)