Am I ungrateful because DP didn’t buy the calendar I wanted before it sold out?

[Gillinggold]

I had a shit week last week and DP knew I was browsing beauty calendar’s. He asked which one I liked and I told him the name of the one I was going to buy.

He told me not to buy it and that he’d treat me to it as one of his Christmas presents to me. I was really grateful and said it sells out quick so to be aware of that.

Lo and behold, he’s gone to buy it and it’s sold out and not coming back in stock. I was annoyed, said I really had my eye on it and would have happily brought it myself as originally intended.

He says I’m being ungrateful and that it’s not his fault. Well, I told him he’d need to get a move on at the time and feel really annoyed now….

You are very rude. I bet you’re not getting any presents as you’ll be on the naughty list.

And ignore the rampant incels...here to disagree with women for the thrills...

🤣

Whether or not its blind consumerism, it was an item you wanted. He makes his grand gesture of saying he will get it for you and didn't listen or respect your knowledge about it selling out really quickly. It's the insensitivity and casual lack of respect that's maddening, he's messed up your whole plan! However now that he has, you need to look for the win win situation. Dont waste a minute feeling upset, find a better thing that you want and make him get that for you. Remain friends and have a great weekend!

It seems people aren't using it as an actual advent calendar. The OP mentioned it would count as one as of her Christmas presents and someone else mentioned using the contents for the next year. Sounds like more of a gift hamper than a calendar.

Why do you hate cats?

Some people just open it all at once

Huh? Of course people are using the contents for the next year…they aren’t going to use the whole product on the day they open the numbered box.
the only people I know who open the whole calendar in one go are ‘influencers’.
i’m assuming the OP meant part of her present, but to be given early.

It's only a calendar. Buy another one.

Ah, not all calendars are made equal.

Bloody hell. You really do have an axe to grind.

Now i know why the laughing emoji was taken away.

There's a wait list

🤐😬

Because years ago I was scratched by one and got a bad infection. They are unpredictable animals. And I could never be doing with an indoor cat that used a litter tray 🤢

@Allthatshines1992

no. It is a calendar. You open a box each day in December and use the product as and when you want. That’s part of the niceness - the seeing what’s for today element. It’s not a hamper.

The link that’s been posted more than once is just a blog affiliate link that takes you to SNK’s website, where it’s sold out. The waitlist on there is for the 2026 calendar, believe it or not!

Ebay resellers will be the only option with, obviously, a hefty premium.

@Gillinggold if there were specific products in it you chose it for, Vinted will have them, and depending on DP’s level of will (suspect low from his ‘ungrateful’ comment) he could buy them for you there. And you could then get one of the others you like a bit less for the advent calendar experience.

BTW I’ve bought my own anxious autistic DD her own beauty advent calendar. (She’s already got a cat.)

There are quite a few vegan cruelty free calendars and many are not that expensive. Have a google and see what appeals to you.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

Hot Wheels Advent Calendar 2025 | Smyths Toys UK https://share.google/SCgEZTzoRPgNvt0UH

This one should be ok as a substitute

I don’t hate them but I would never want to get one and I agree the whole litter tray thing would gross me out. And wouldn’t want them crapping in my neighbours garden etc either.

Hadn’t heard of a beauty calendar before this thread but from what I’ve heard of it I’d also prefer one to a cat and it would work out cheaper in the long run as it’s not cheap to be a (responsible) pet owner!

I find them unpredictable too - I was scratched on two desperate occasions by them in childhood/teen years and was bare legged on both occasions. Thankfully didn’t get an infection though.

I had a mate whose aunty tripped over theirs and hurt themselves badly- I think that’s not that uncommon as they creep around so quietly so you don’t always see them .

Even if I did like them , as someone slightly accident prone who has been known to trip on a few occasions 👀 I think I’d be asking for trouble to have one slinking around getting under my feet 😂

But the bottom line is Op or anyone else can spend her money as they see fit. It’s daft to say why don’t you spend your money on X or Y thing - because we are all different!

Some people like A,B and C while you may like X,Y,Z. It’s really not a hard concept to understand.

Dont sweat the small stuff... And its ALL small stuff!!

You are being ungrateful … it’s only a calendar. I am a man and if my wife was angry at me for such … I would never offer to do anything for her again…

How are you being ungrateful if you didn't even get it? I don't understand why people are saying you're ungrateful. You would have happily bought it yourself and in good time, probably, but he offered to (which was nice in itself) but in the time he took to go and get it, it sold out. Being ungrateful if when you're given something and don't appreciate it. If you didn't even get what you wanted and would've got it if you could've just been allowed to buy it yourself, you're allowed to be pissed off. If I was your partner, I'd apologise for not being able to get it like I said rather than calling you ungrateful. It's not like he queued all night and bought some magical special edition version and you didn't like it!

But..... in this case, the man didn't do anything for her
so what is your point?

Ungrateful? Lol, it’s not like he got it and you couldn’t be bothered saying thanks!