To be fuming DH forgot school shoes AGAIN?

[solitudehiker]

Right so I sent DH into Clarks yesterday because DS2’s school shoes are literally falling apart sole coming off flapping around and I said PLEASE just get him black school shoes any black school shoes that fit his feet I don’t care what brand

He comes back smug as anything with… black TRAINERS 😑 like proper sporty ones not even pretending to be school shoes says “it’s all they had in his size” and now of course DS2 thinks they’re amazing and is buzzing to wear them

Except school are super strict and will 100% say no trainers allowed then I’ll be the one trying to explain it Monday morning and DS2 will have a meltdown because he wanted to wear them and I’ll look like the crap mum who can’t get it right

DH is now saying I’m being dramatic and “they’re basically the same thing” 🙄 and if school say anything he’ll “have a word” but he won’t be the one stood in the playground while the teacher side-eyes me

AIBU to be absolutely fuming and tempted to just go buy the right ones today even though money is tight and I’ll have to drag all 5 DC with me because DH has now “gone to watch the match with his mates” 😩

Ask him for the receipt and go exchange them, dont buy a new pair.

Although I'd be tempted to let him deal with it.

The answer here is that he takes dc to school on Monday and you email in advance to tell them any uniform issues need to be raised with their dad, here is his number.

Return the trainers and buy school shoes obviously. DS has no say in it, if his school don’t allow trainers there’s nothing you can do about it.

Weaponised incompetence. He really, really doesn't want to buy those shoes.

He goes into school on Monday to explain. If it makes him late for work, he lets work know he’ll be in late.

Yeah dad does drop off and make him the primary person they phone.

Thanks all yep 100% weaponised incompetence 😂 he even admitted he didn’t bother asking in the shop if they had actual school shoes he just grabbed the first pair that fit

I think I’ll drag the kids out later and just swap them I cba with the Monday morning drama and DS2 having a strop before school 🙄 DH will absolutely NOT be doing drop off Monday he leaves for work at 6am so no chance but I might email school if there’s an issue and give them his number just to be petty 😂

Honestly why is it always me who ends up sorting this stuff I swear if I left it to him they’d all be in mismatched socks and PE kits for life

Sounds like you’d have 1 less child to deal with if you LTB

Jesus, he really doesn't even pretend to care anymore, does he? What an arse.

Hilarious. Sorry but this made me titter because my xdh was a useless wanker incompetent too. I solved my problems by adding EX to his title

Thats some lazy waster you married.
I wouldn't be laughing about it.
He would be sorting it out.

If he was a repeat offender I’d 100% tell dh to make up whatever he wanted but he was doing drop off on Monday. You’re taking ds to urgent gp appt to check for appendicitis ,you’ve been up half the night, and he will be in late after you get back. But turns out it was just a tummy bug. (Has happened to me and more than once, it’s quite believable - the joys of a dramatic child who goes by the principle of if I’m awake and miserable then everyone will be awake and miserable.)

Grabbed the first pair that fit? In my local Clarks you take a ticket, get kids feet measured and then they bring out the ones you like in the correct size to try on. Sounds like bs.

It’s always you because you’ve, yet again, decided to solve it all yourself at massive inconvenience to you and absolutely none to him - he’s off out with his mates, he doesn’t care! That’s how ‘weaponised incompetence’ works… next time, you’ll just do it yourself in the first place and then he’ll really be laughing.

He should be the one returning them. Is he always this infuriating?

Exactly this! Ugh.

In his defence he clearly has no idea how things work when it comes to school uniform policie so in his own wisdom it will be fine and no Issue

tbe only way to deal with this is ok et the whole drama run its course and he deals
but that isn’t a great option as dmm m DC gets caught in the middle

Please please please, learn to value yourself a little more. He doesn’t value you at all.

Haha ok maybe a bit harsh to LTB over school shoes but honestly today I could 😂 he’s not a total waste of space he does loads with the kids when he’s here but anything like school admin or uniform just falls to me and he acts like he’s done me a favour even going to the shop

And yes you’re right I do just end up sorting it myself because it’s easier than the Monday morning carnage and I hate the thought of DS2 feeling embarrassed if teacher says something he’s already quite shy

Also lol at the Clarks comment he literally said he didn’t bother waiting for the ticket thing because the queue was too long and he just asked someone to check a random pair in DS2s size which explains why we ended up with trainers 🙄

Why is it always you? Because you choose to do it and seem like on some level you like it. Just let it play out and give tell them to call your husband. I'm assuming they have his number. Yes he's displaying weaponised incompetence, but you are being a wifey martyr on purpose as well.

Lazy fecker. Why are you taking the kids and sorting it out this afternoon? Why isn't he?

I will admit one of the many things I liked about ds’s school was that they never enforced the ‘no black trainers’ and ‘no black jeans’ rules and so 100% of the children wore black trainers and jeans and it was great. But otherwise… fuck him and his slackness. Bookmarking for the next person who posts asking ‘what is the mental load’. How is he off with his mates in this scenario??

Send him back out

Dragging FIVE kids into town to fix this useless ballbag's mistake? Fuck that.

Maybe, just maybe, he doesn’t give a damn about the type of shoes his child wears to school because he knows it will in absolutely no way affect his child’s education! Maybe we should all be more like him and stop pandering to ridiculous uniform rules.