Why why why are they like this!!!

[Hellofrances]

My boyfriend stayed overnight at my house for the first time on Wednesday.

We both had yesterday off so had a lazy morning watching tv in bed.

He broke wind really loud and grabbed my head and forced it under the covers, I couldn’t move from under them for about 10 seconds.

He thought it was hilarious, I told him I’m a 37 year old woman and don’t appreciate that.

I think it’s the fact we’d not long been intimate and he was being really jokey.

I told one of my friends who found it amusing and said it’s a sign he’s comfortable around me which is good, but I don’t agree!

That’s really grim, my husband would never do something like that.

Is your boyfriend a 10 year old boy because that’s the kind of humour kids like.

They're not all like that!
Grabbing your head and forcing it anywhere would be a deal breaker for me, let alone after he'd broken wind.
Throw this one back and find someone who treats you far better...

I'd dump him

Disgusting. If that’s after one night I dread to think how it’ll be in a few years. Actually I do know and I divorced him

I would hate that too. if he did it and then, when you made it clear you didn't like it, he immediately stopped, apologised, and never did it again, I might be willing to say let it go. But the fact that he has zero respect for what you do and dont' find appropriate and no interest in accomodating that means I'd end this one now.

If he did this so soon in the relationship, what do you think he's going to do when he's really feeling comfortable? This is him on best behaviour!

Leave him. They are not all like this.

Sometimes I have difficulty believing these situations are real.

Anyone physically forcing me to do something for his own amusement would not be stepping over my threshold ever agsin.

Don’t think that is normal and sounds completely weird and awful. Not sure what sort of friends you have also if she found that funny.

It is the forced your head part I do not like. It is rough and a bit scary to have that happen. Men are stronger than they think and it can hurt a bit too.

'They' aren't, I've literally never had someone do this to me.

WTAF?

LTB and fast!

Utterly foul, and potentially a dangerous man. Please get rid.

Same. A fanny clamp would appear immediately

If this is real then you are being vvvvvvvvvu for not immediately kicking him out of bed and dumping his pathetic arse

My husband has never ever used force on me, ever. He would absolutely never do something like hold my head down even as a joke. That would cross a line for me. It would scare the shit out of me.

I only realised how much stronger my husband was than me when he easily picked me up and walked around, I’m 11st, the strength difference is immense, he doesn’t even work out, heaviest thing he lifts is a laptop bag. Any man who uses not even his full strength to hold you down against your will is dangerous imo.

Thanks all, this is the first red flag and out of the blue. I need to think about what to do now.

You just need to end the relationship, this isn't funny behaviour, if you stay he will do it again or find another way to abuse you/punish you. Stop giving men like this chances, he's already old enough to know better but he still did it.

@Hellofrances it was horrible and childish but not necessarily a deal breaker IF he is otherwise an allround good egg?

eta; and he took note of your disgust, hence something never to be done again

Throw this one back. It's a juvenile

The use of his strength/force on you would be an absolute dealbreaker for me. Also the dutch oven thing is really grim but using force to hold you in position is really crossing a line even if it was all "a joke". It doesn't sound like you've been together long if it's his first time staying at yours so i'd cut this one loose now - massive red flag.

I would be reconsidering the relationship. In my experience, even stupid and immature men don't do this sort of thing to women they care about. Holding you for ten seconds in a position you don't like and in which you can't breathe pleasantly is sinister. It's not harmless and hilarious just because a fart is involved.

I would end this relationship immediately. Any situation where you are being physically controlled against your will should be a huge red flag.

Huge red flag because at the very least he felt the need to show you he has physical dominance over you

Nope….huge red flag.