Why are people so impatient and nasty?

[Puel]

Went to supermarket this morning - I always go early so it’s not busy. I was pulling a trolly out and was suddenly shoved from behind and told “watch where you’re going!”. I apologised but obviously didn’t realise someone was stood right behind me but this person was livid, was there really a need to be so angry and aggressive?!

So I’m stood in post office queue, temporarily distracted and didn’t realise the cashier was waiting for me until the person behind me literally barged past me and went in front. I expected the cashier to tell them I was next yet instead, she rolled her eyes and laughed with the pusher. And before anyone says I was daydreaming for hours etc, it was literally a few seconds of not paying attention.

So I’m back doing my shopping and I stopped and quickly checked my list on my phone - I then heard “excuse me!” And looked up to see an angry looking woman rolling her eyes. I moved out of the way and she snapped “I need to be in that fridge!” So I moved again. At this point I felt like abandoning my trolly and just walking out! What is it with people lately?? I’ve noticed an increase in snappy and inpatient behaviour recently, is it the fact that people in this country are just so generally unhappy these days??

Oh yeah I'll just tell nursery that they need to stay open an extra half an hour to keep my daughter because some self entitled woman decided the whole shop needs to go at her speed. Or alternatively I'll pick her up on time and tell her there's no dinner because I can't actually buy dinner in half an hour because self entitled people decided that everything has to be done at their pace. And no, I can't just leave work early to make more time to allow others to faff as long as they like and still get dinner bought and cooked on time. Time cannot simply be made because you want more of it, it can only be taken away from other things. So who am I dropping to "be more patient" and spend an extra half hour in the supermarket? Would it be grandma who needs to me to do her cleaning or shall I just not see my mum for a month? If I go at your speed and let everything take twice as long to be virtuously patient I would have to drop people/responsibilities in my life. And for what? I shouldn't have to.

The whole world doesn't revolve around you. Other people have a certain amount of time they can allocate to a task, and it quite simply needs to be done in that time. You clearly didn't read my post fully before you started getting your knickers in a twist and putting angry emojis and defiant statements in.

Take as long as you like, go as slow as you like, everyone has that right. You don't have the right to act like you're the only person there. A few years ago I broke my leg and was in a wheelchair for a month, I wheeled my wheelchair down one side of the aisle so that people could easily go past me so I wasn't holding them up, if someone wanted something blocked by me I just wheeled forward or backwards a foot. Not a problem. I would never just wheel down the middle, blocking the aisle completely so no one can get past either way and just stop and stare into space so when someone wanted something I was blocking I just didn't notice and waited til they shouted excuse me three times. I never had a shopping experience where I pissed three people off in one shop! That is what we are talking about here. If you're being considerate to others around you, aren't completely ignorant of others and where they are going, have been asked politely to move because someone needs to get past and you do so because you're actually paying attention but it takes a few seconds instead of "jumping out of my way" that's not an issue at all, so why are you making it out to be?

When you are pulling a trolley out from a trolley bay you have to go backwards untill you have space to turn the trolley around. People behind you should know this as they are about to do the same so should be aware. And give you space to do this

Oh I am so sorry, I will make my kegs go faster fir your convenience then shall I? 😡 Oh sorry I carnt because my disability confirmed by doctors means I can't.😡 I won't avoid shopping as I love my independence, your in a rush, that's great, but you should be aware that if Im stood looking for an item I carnt just jump out if because my legs literally carnt just move out the way quicky.

Why can't you understand what is being explained to you?

No one wants you to go faster. No one wants you to avoid shopping. No one wants you to jump out of the way. Stop being so dramatic.

People want you to be considerate of those you are sharing the space with and not act like you're the only person in the shop. Be aware of your surroundings, stand to the side and leave space for people to pass, don't just stand in the middle of the aisle so no one can get past. Actually pay attention if you are in a queue and don't stand there day dreaming or staring at your phone while everyone is waiting for you. It's nothing to do with your legs. It's about your self awareness in a public space.

I'm not the Op. I do all the things you've said. I'm very aware. But when Im looking at products I carnt just move out of the way, people need to be considerate and wait. I don't stand looking at my phone, I pay attention in queues, you are definitely confusing me for another poster. All I've said is I carnt just suddenly moved because of my mobility issues and in this case other people need to show some awareness

I never do this but you are giving me a brain twitch @Laserwho, you 'can't move' out of the way or you 'can't go faster'. There is no R in can't.
Sorry, as you were.

So you have the right to exist in the world in the way that you want to, but other people don't?

What self-entitled nonsense

I have aphasia. As you were 😡

Very well said

I agree. As a Christian, it makes sense to me. In Matthew 24.12, it tells us in the last days: "Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold."

If you need to do everything at such a speed, why not just leave more time for your journey so you're not so stressed

No, I'm not confusing you with the OP or another poster. I'm giving examples of behaviours people find annoying, which absolutely aren't anything to do with having mobility issues to prove the point no one has a problem with you "not being able to jump out of the way".

You read my post about ignorant selfish people and made it about yourself having mobility issues, which are irrelevant to what I was saying and started throwing angry emojis about. I am clarifying my point and how it has nothing to do with having a problem with disabled people.

The fact that you yourself are pointing out that what I'm saying to you and what you are saying back have nothing to do with eachother is hilarious because that's the point I was trying to make. Yet you continue to get your knickers in a twist, post angry faces and make out I have a problem with the disabled whole peddling a narrative people who are short on time expect you to "jump out of the way" while very over dramatically bringing your doctor into it. It's ridiculous!!!

If you don't get in everyone's way by being ignorant and oblivious, you actually pay attention to your surroundings, make an effort not to block the aisles or hold up queues, then what exactly is your problem with me pointing out that this is the behaviour that is expected of people and the problem is people who don't do this?

Of course you have the right to exist is the world the way you want, up until the point you start impeding other people's freedom to do the same.

Being in a rush and expecting common courtesy from the dawdlers doesn't make me entitled. I pay attention to my surroundings, I make sure I don't block the walkways, I make sure I don't hold up the queue, I pay attention to where I'm going and make sure I don't walk into people or stick my trolley where someone is looking. I do these things to ensure I don't impede on other people's space or the way they move around the shop. I expect everyone else to do the same. I will rush about my shop without getting in anyone's way, and in return I expect the dawdlers to make sure they don't get in my way.

Blocking walkways, day dreaming, faffing and just wafting about the place like it's yours alone and having no consideration for the people you are sharing the space with is entitled nonsense. You can't just idle down a road and block the traffic because you feel like it. Walkways are the same.

Agreed. People tend to be more patient with disabled people in general. Obviously you will get those who are completely rude and think that someone in a wheelchair or an elderly person with a zimmer frame are doing it on purpose.

But when people are just obliviously going about their own slow pace it’s extremely infuriating.

I especially hate those in groups who stand chatting in the middle of an aisle in shops completely oblivious to those around them.

I hate large groups of people in shopping centres who appear out of nowhere (usually walking out of a shop and cut in front of you) and start walking in front of you in their group and then saunter along, chatting to each other while blocking any chance of anyone getting past them. I’ve had this happen when I’ve been trying to chase my then 2 year old who managed to break free and run ahead of me in a large crowded shopping centre and when a family/ group of about 5 just decided to cut in front of me and saunter merrily along blocking the view of my child and any chance I had of grabbing him before he left my view. Needless to say I gave them a piece of my mind as I could have quite easily lost my child because of them.

The examples I’ve given have nothing to do with disabilities and more to do with the complete ignorance of people in a crowded place thinking that everyone should go at their ridiculously slow pace just because they have all day.

My friend who works at a supermarket, is a first aider. One time she attended a customer that fainted and hit her head on shelving. She saw customers tut because of the lady fainted by the shelving. A few customers stepped over the lady. That's fucking rude and disrespectful. My friend was with another first aid trained colleague and another colleague. The other colleague said if you wanted a jar of jam or peanut butter, just ask and she could give them the jar. How much more time would that take? Probably the same time.

How would these customers that stepped over the unwell customer like it, if someone did that to them or a loved one?

I happened to be in a supermarket when a group of 8 mums each with a DC in a pushchair came in together. Only 2 of them went to buy things and all 8 and pushchairs clogged the self scans. It annoyed everyone. As I purchased some painkillers, I needed to be approved. The staff member says the 8 mums is almost a daily occurrence, with another 3-4 DC coming in during the holidays with the mums. Why do they all need to visit the supermarket when only two needed to buy things? I bet they do this at other shops and a different two mums want to buy things.

They are taking about 3-4x more time doing this instead of meeting up somewhere central. Plus annoying staff and customers.

There are definitely some nasty fuckers around. Stop apologising to them!

It does sound like you may have some spatial awareness issues though. That can be annoying.

Maybe shoplifting.

They are not the same in the least, we all have a right to walk at what ever pace we wish, if you're so busy, adjust your schedule accordingly

The staff member at self scan did say security and managers have checked CCTV and they don't shoplift. Not at the store.

Yes I have heard of gangs of parents shoplifting using the pushchairs to conceal their nickage.

Yes you have the right to walk at whatever pace you wish. I have that right too.

You don't have the right to obstruct walkways if other people want to walk faster than you and get past.

So that’s what I said earlier in the thread.
If you have mobility issues, you MUST have something with you to SHOWS you’re disabled otherwise you’re just treated as an inconvenience to others.
bpBecause its totally uncomprehensible to abled that you might be have a hidden disability.
Otherwise be prepare
1- to take twice as much time fur you to shop because youre supposed to get out of tge way if the abled who cant wait 2 seconds. Never mind you might not have that spare capacity
2- be tutted at, pushed out of the way etc

And that's not me being a martyr or imagining things.
Thats my own (raw) experience. id never go anywhere wo a stick because of that. never mind I dont go any faster or slower with it.
But it gives (some) people the chance for a feel good factor for being nice and helpful to a disabled. You dont get that wo the obvious sign of disability 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

When my DM came off using a walking stick after hip replacements, she continued to use it when visiting shops for another 2-3 months as a visual to others that she has mobility issues.

The examples I have given are nothing to do with mobility. I’m not sure what your point is of quoting me? As it has nothing to do with my post. I have just said that I nearly ended up losing my child in a crowded shopping centre because a large group of people who cut in front of me and proceeded to block my way. No mobility issues, just ignorant fucks just laughing and joking and completely oblivious to the fact that people needed to get past them. There is a huge difference between having a disability and just being downright ignorant.

People do have that right, however annoying you may find it, just walk around them.