To have let friend down last minute with dog sitting

[Rawfoodworries]

The arrangement was I’d dog sit for 4 days, dog has always been fed on dry dog food no issues and I wasn’t expected to do anything more than feed, walk, look after him. With a week to go I’ve just had a message explaining his new diet (raw!!! With all theses extra things eggs sweet potato vegetable and some kind of oil!) I can’t cope with that as I’m vegetarian and autistic and have issues around food smells!

There’s also a grooming appt ??! That I’m expected to take him to. I’ve said it’s not going to be possible for me to facilitate the raw feeding or the appointment. This has caused a massive issue as friend wasn’t prepared to back down so I’ve said ‘sorry you’ll have to make alternative arrangements’ AIBU ? It’s been arranged for months and I even saw them last week and nothing was mentioned then but apparently he’s been on this new diet for a while ??

The dog is her responsibility not yours.

She sounds a bit of a user and off loader to me. If she gan get someone to do the hard and messy bits. She will do.

Beware!!!

I've raw fed my dogs and ewww the blood in the pack after it defrosts and how it would end up in my sink when I was opening the pack. The smell made me want to vomit too, plus seeing capillaries and parts of organs and vessels 🤢 🤢 🤢 I am vegetarian and autistic though and can't even cut up a cooked chicken 😂 can't stand the texture the texture.

She's taking the piss.
You haven't let her down, she's changed things to what was agreed. If he can have dry food and no appointments, you'll do it. Her choice. Don't let her make you feel bad!

I raw feed my 2, it’s really not that difficult.
It’s a healthier diet, and regardless of whether you’re a vegetarian or not, dogs are not.. The meat comes frozen and I literally get mine out, defrost and feed… you don’t have to cook or do anything to it.

Your friend could however buy a brand that is raw, but is dehydrated so looks like kibble .. this would be much easier for you to feed, I believe you just put a certain weight into a bowl, add water and feed. Maybe you could suggest this to her?
Again adding an egg and a squirt of fish oil takes literally seconds and isn’t difficult.

I think leaving her in the shit only a week before her holiday is really unreasonable. It’s not ideal booking a groom for while the dog is being looked after, but these appointments are sometimes REALLY hard to come by and it may have been while you had the dog or nothing available for another 6 weeks…. I’ve got poodle crosses and honestly when they need grooming, they cannot be left for another 6 weeks because they become so unmanageable. Also unless it’s miles away can’t see the issue, you drop dig off, go about your own business for an hour or 2 and collect a clean nice smelling dog a couple of hours later.

I think you both needed to talk and come up with a compromise regarding the feeding and grooming.
I think you panicked and felt overwhelmed by the changes of expectarion. You’ve over thought it all.

Could they prep all the food in tupperwares and according to portion? It might take up a lot of fridge/freezer space but then you could pop it in the bowl. Also I think they should postpone the grooming appointment. TBH if I asked someone to cat sit for me and was cooking the cat food I’d prep it all in advance.

YANBU I’m a Groomer and I particularly don’t like it when people send other people with their dogs. Issues need to be discussed with the owner and if something goes wrong they don’t have any authority. I also raw feed my own dogs but wouldn’t put that on another person unless they offered as it’s a fair bit of work.

I have fed raw food when dog sitting for a friend in her own home. I'm not vegetarian & don't have sensory issues but the blood and smell were nauseating. I had to weigh each serving and add a certain amount of tripe. I retched if I looked at it so I became very competent at only seeing it out of the corner of my eye. I would never agree to do this at my own house - I do it at hers because I love the dogs.

Your friend should’ve realised six weeks ago that the new diet would’ve meant you were unlikely to be able/want to feed their dog and have checked with you weeks ago, on the assumption that this would be the case. This is 100% of them and their lack of thought/thinking ahead.

The grooming appointment is a compete piss take and speaks volumes,

You haven’t let your friend down at all. You agreed to plan A not plan B. You are still prepared to do plan A (which now isn’t even an option and they should’ve realised that).

I hope your friend isn’t trying to make you feel guilty and has realised that they messed up.

Even if you weren’t vegetarian that would be a tall order. She can find a professional dog-sitter who may be prepared to do all that, but I guess she wanted to do it on the cheap. She’s taking advantage of you and exploiting your friendship to save a few quid. If she really cares about her dogs she’ll want them fed by someone experienced in raw-feeding. Otherwise, she shouldn’t leave them at home to go on holiday.

She needs to compromise as you’re doing her a massive favour, I’d never dream of booking an appointment for our dog when she was being looked after by someone else so that needs cancelling.
I think the compromise for feeding is the pre bagging of dogs raw food, yes on a normal basis she may prepare it on the day but as she’s not there it needs doing in advance. Surely you can then open the bag and tip it into the bowl, no touching of the food whatsoever, maybe wear a face mask if the smell is an issue?!
I’m sure the dog isn’t going to turn its nose up at the food just because it was prepared in advance and not on the day 🤣

OP has said she can’t do the raw meat, why are people still pushing for it saying she can’t just pour it from a bag? She can’t do it! Are you cheeky fuckers with your friends too?

Your friend is a cherky fxxker.
I wouldn't entertain this for a minute.
She is a user.
Not your problem.

www.facebook.com/share/v/17Ctd7JsnL/?mibextid=wwXIfr

There are dehydrated brands out there. So they look like kibble but with the benefit of raw. I’m sure Bella and duke is one each brand.

Ffs this takes pet sitting to a whole other level …another example of pampered pooches and entitled dog owners 🤣

Her demands,particularly with no notice, are unreasonable. Moreover the fact that she created a ‘massive issue’ without offering a compromise makes her a CF. She should have apologized, immediately rearranged the groomer and come up with a food solution that suited you. She isn’t even paying you! I would not indulge this ‘friend’ and I’d imagine she has form for this.

I would have told her that I am still prepared to do the dog sitting, but only if she provides her dog with a diet that I can cope with, i.e. either return it to the previous dry diet or buy in meals that you just have to feed to the dog. As to taking it to a groomer, tell her that you don't feel able to be responsible for that, and that she will need to rearrange it for when she gets back from her trip.
You are doing her the favour, and she needs to understand your point of view on this.

I look after dogs for a living, and am also neurodivergent. I would struggle with this too. Firstly from the point of view of plans changing at the last minute, that hurts my brain all on its own.
Secondly, I can totally understand the sensory issues, particularly when it's the feel of it, and the smell, and that you wouldn't be handling any meat at all usually. That's a lot of things to 'get over' in one go, and compounded by having no notice to think of ways to cope.
Thirdly, all of that raw stuff can be a hygiene issue in your own kitchen if you haven't done all of the research beforehand.
Finally, if I was boarding a dog that needed all that extra time and effort just for feeding, plus unnecessary grooming appointments, I would charge considerably more per day for their care.

You are not being unreasonable. Your friend is. They haven't bothered to take into consideration your neurodivergence, sensory issues, personal dietary choices, or mental wellbeing, and now they're trying to guilt trip you. F**k that noise.

She wants special care so will need to pay someone qualified special prices, she knows so has the hump.

The appointment can be changed. Why not get her to bag the raw up separately and you can wear disposable plastic gloves whilst feeding the dog. I'm vegetarian and my dog eats raw. It's not that bad....

Could you not feed dog for the 4 days on his previous diet ? They could reschedule the grooming appointment. Then you're both happy for now.
Going forward arrangements need to be sorted out between you or you just can't do it anymore.

She can put her mutt in a boarding facility or animal hospital or something. It's for four days. Or hire someone. Either way you should not be expected to go against your own values and morals to take care of somebody else's responsibilities.

@Rawfoodworries perhaps you could point out to your friend that they're is no scientific evidence that raw feeding is any better for the dog, and is mainly Internet tend? The only scientific evidence is that cross contamination of things like e.coli and campylobacter to humans is prevalent. If your friend isn't buying prepared raw, and is making their own, I would also point out that there is emerging evidence that raw feeding dogs is causing increased incidents of neosporosis in cattle which causes them to abort calves.

Just agree and take a bag of dry food with you. Ring up groomers and re arrange.

I would tell them I’m really upset , it’s incredibly rude of them to spring on a vegetarian that they want you to feed their dog raw meat and of bloody course you’re cancelling, unbelievable she’s mad at you about this.