To have let friend down last minute with dog sitting

[Rawfoodworries]

The arrangement was I’d dog sit for 4 days, dog has always been fed on dry dog food no issues and I wasn’t expected to do anything more than feed, walk, look after him. With a week to go I’ve just had a message explaining his new diet (raw!!! With all theses extra things eggs sweet potato vegetable and some kind of oil!) I can’t cope with that as I’m vegetarian and autistic and have issues around food smells!

There’s also a grooming appt ??! That I’m expected to take him to. I’ve said it’s not going to be possible for me to facilitate the raw feeding or the appointment. This has caused a massive issue as friend wasn’t prepared to back down so I’ve said ‘sorry you’ll have to make alternative arrangements’ AIBU ? It’s been arranged for months and I even saw them last week and nothing was mentioned then but apparently he’s been on this new diet for a while ??

If it were as simple as opening a packet and dropping it in, I don’t there’d be a such a problem. However, dog owners is wanting raw egg, fresh veg etc added every day. Perhaps she should have hired a chef!

Lovely display of abelism there, but you're not alone on the thread either.

Nothing to do with disability/sensory issues or otherwise. If OP isn't happy to feed raw meat then it doesn't matter why she isn't happy to feed raw meat.
If you looked after a cat but the owner sprung on you that they changed from dry food and pouches to dead mice and here is a bag of frozen mice. No need to touch, just pop it out of the bag into the cat's dish and let it defrost.... You may rightfully decide that you weren't going to do that. OP has no obligation to fulfil the friend's wishes against her own. She doesn't have to get on with it.

No you cant have a vegetarian dog ffs

It doesn’t have to be done fresh, she’s choosing to do that. It wouldn’t be good for the dog to go back onto dried food, but it could easily have one of the complete raw food for a few days which is basically just mince meat. Though it’s also fine for you to say you can’t cope with that either. My vegetarian sister managed to feed my dog raw food, but she cooks meat for her own family so was more used to it.

I have seen stuff described as freeze dried raw food that looks like kibble, though I’ve never looked into it, that might be a possibility if you’re willing to consider still dog sitting if your friend stops being so unreasonable.

To be honest I’m quite shocked at your friends behaviour though. She is massively taking the piss. Why on earth hasn’t she just rearranged the groomer for goodness sake?!

Nonsense. The OP is not forcing the friend to cancel the trip. The friend assumed that the OP would be fine with the goalposts being moved. She isn't.

It's the friend's responsibility to find suitable accommodation for the dog.

Rubbish.

She is following through on what she agree do. It's the dog owner who is trying to change the parameters.

Your absolutely fine to say no
Your friend has moved the goal posts

If you weren’t autistic I would say YABU about the food (but not the groomers).

But if you’re genuinely too disabled to feed the dog what it needs to be healthy then you can’t help it, you have to pull out. The fact that you’ve started this thread though does make me wonder if you truly are incapable of doing it, or if you just don’t fancy it because you think it’s gross.

I sort of get why she is annoyed but it’s entirely her own fault. She saw you recently so she should’ve brought you fully up to speed with the dog new diet and she should have showed it to you and explained what you were required to do and asked if you were okay with it. Then you could’ve taken the opportunity to tell her you absolutely were not and she would have had more time to made other arrangements.
May I ask, was she paying you for this service or were you doing it free of charge as a friend?

She must know that you vegetarian surely. That’s too big an ask .
It very likely wouldn’t hurt the dog to have kibble for a few days. (Remember though that there are many recalls by companies for contaminated kibble..salmonella etc so be as careful as you can)
I’m veggie and raw feed and have done for 50 odd years and still find it difficult .
As for the groomer..of course she can change the date.

Wow! Did you read 'any' of the poster’s comments?? She’s vegan!

Your friend has definitely changed the circumstances of you dog sitting which is unfair.

Just because you can handle it doesn’t mean others can.

I’m not ND and I would have said no too because if you have someone doing you a favour especially when it comes to pets and knowing your friend is xyz, you tell them asap if something has changed with said pet
, and ASK if they are still able, not assume that it is fine.

I’m not vegetarian but I don’t like dealing with raw meat if I can help it. There’s a major difference between putting dry food in a bowl and doing what they have asked OP to do.

She is a cheeky fucker.

However, she COULD prep his food in bags - if she flattens them out and freezes them as flat sheets, you can then peel the bag off the frozen block, and drop it in a dog bowl and let it defrost, all without touching (and the dog can eat it partially defrosted too!)

SO if she wants her dog feeding that diet (And it is what I feed our dogs), then she can make it easier for you.

You cannot raw feed a vegetarian dog, you would have a dog who was starving hungry and squitting through the eye of a needle, dogs are not vegetarian and do not digest veg all that well, it makes up a tiny part of their diets.

You can buy frozen raw nuggets, and with those you just tip a few out into the bowl and let it defrost (so prep the next meal as you're feeding the current one, using two bowls) - she could put him on that for a few days, but moving back to kibble wouldn't be appropriate, no.

Actually as dogs are omnivores rather than carnivore a few days without meat wouldn't hurt.
Of course the dog may turn up his nose and prefer to go hungry, but again 4 days will not kill him.
@Rawfoodworries maybe that is a way around the problem, just ask them to change the grooming appointment, and feed "no meat raw" for the 4 days?
Don't feel guilty about dropping out though, they have altered the deal too much, especially if they know you're veggie and have sensory issues!

A few days with a fifth of the calories you need would not do you any harm either - but you wouldn't enjoy it I bet!

And if she bumps up the veg so the dog isn't starving hungry, she will have a squitty dog.

I don't think we should accept things purely on the basis that they do no long term harm - starving a dog for four days would cause suffering even if its short term. Not acceptable!

OP doesn’t need to get a grip or give her head a wobble - not her dog not her problem 🤣 she’s not the one desperate for doggy day care. Her doing the favour it’s her rules 🤣

They could leave them on dry while they’re away after all the dogs were used to it, I always make it as easy as possible for my dog sitter so urnbu

lol. Then the owner can make the decision to not travel where they can’t take their dog.

the dog owner’s friend is not the one letting the animal down here.

When I read the title, I thought you’d be in the wrong for letting friend down but now I’ve read all of it, definitely not. She’s not kept up her end of the bargain (changing the diet, adding the appointment.) it’s totally fine for you to cancel and you’ve done nothing wrong

It's a very big ask. I wouldn't like to do it. I have seen you can buy ready prepared raw meals and just defrost one at a time. Maybe that would work?

Not necessarily. OP is vegetarian and has sensory issues around smell. I'm guessing this means the smell of meat, which they wouldn't experience with their own meal preparation.

I'm not autistic (afaik) but do have sensory issues & it's really like a kind of pain. In fact in some cases pain would be preferable. It's not simply an "I don't like it but I can deal" situation.

I agree. But disability/sensory issues do make it more difficult/impossible to be flexible.

Lots of folks on this thread don't seem to understand sensory issues. It's not just an "I don't like" but almost physically painful. I'm not autistic (afaik) but I do have sensory issues and in some cases pain would be preferable.

E.G: for most ppl fabric which has "pilled" feels a bit unpleasant. For me it's as though my skin is going through a cheese grater.

OP has said they have issues around food smells. It's not about their preference, or the effort of food prep or the ethics of feeding meat - it's literally not being able to cope with the smell.

I'm guessing therefore that it wouldn't help if the owners pre prepped the food.

IDK whether frozen food defrosting in the bowl, or maybe dried raw food would be manageable, but no, OP YANBU. I'm sorry your friend hasn't been more thoughtful or considerate about this.