Snapped in the parent and child parking

[seize]

Juggling my 3 month old from their baby carrier trying to get them into the car seat, a car pulls in and asks me to close my door, while I’m halfway into getting my baby in their seat.

Out hops a child in school uniform about 10 years old, not help needing any help to get out, my face must have had an expression of surprise. Someone in need of this space being asked to stop what they’re doing to allow someone not in need of the space to use it. The adult said “ignorant” loudly at me. So I snapped back, “these spaces are for people with babies and children that need help getting in and out, they aren’t for older children” she snaps something back at me about not knowing how old their child is (the one that is in school uniform, fairly tall, that needed no help getting out and is now safely stood in a car park without the adult needing to have them in their line of sight) and the bratty child screams “yeah!”.

I’ve had it with these spaces, they aren’t a convenience for people that happen to have a person under the age of 16 with them. They’re for people who genuinely need the help getting them in and out and need the extra space.

i think to he whole situation is quite barmy really. These child places should be restricted to children who under five and obviously disabled children should be a priority at whatever age.

As for one of the comments about moaning and having no rights to judge and police people.

Wll yes don't make meal of it. But you have every right to make comments about entitled selfish arseholes who think the world revolves around them try to push you around

I also sense that it has been trendy for years now To put down people who speak upand have a moan about annoying situations which are patently wrong.

It seems like a kind of self appointed superiority that they are above everyday matters.Or everyday situations like the above. Which never never happen to them.

They. live this very smooth life with no frustrations. Liars to a tee.

I’m with you OP. Even worse is single guys with Teslas or other fancy cars who use parent and child spaces. In my opinion, it should be same as disabled parking, where you have to have a badge to show you have a genuine need.

Not really the need to be showing attitude by the other driver when you see someone in parent and baby space juggling a 3 month old. The other driver sounds quite entitled. I would have taken extra time quite frankly.

They are for 12 and under because under 12 they are deemed to not fully understand the dangers around them so still need parental help in places like car parks etc. My 4 year old could do what the 10 year old you described did but it doesnt mean I would allow it at 4 or 10. My child should be in my sight at all times.

Hi there, just reading the comments. I have a 12 year old boy who is autistic and non verbal, I have a blue badge for him so I can park nearer to the shop/store as he has no awareness of danger. Can I park in a parent/child space? Sometimes there are no disability spaces, so I have to struggle in a normal car park space and I'm constantly watching him and keeping him nearby as he refuses to hold my hold most of the time.

Don’t 12 year olds take themselves off to secondary school. I used to travel on a train on my own in Y6.

obviously SN dc are not in this category

My 7 year old has ADHD and he can be impulsive and unsafe across a car park. He's very bright and tall and while sometimes his behaviour would obviously indicate to someone he is ND, it's plenty of times not necessarily the case in that moment.

I wouldn't have been rude to you or asked you to do anything at all so I think she was out of order there, but that should be your gripe with her, not the age of her child. You never know what someone has going on and I think we should all operate with empathy and discretion, unless someone demonstrates clearly that we should feel otherwise.

Yes you need the space to keep him safe so use it

I would be happy with them being further away with a safe walking route to the shops. My issues are around space to open doors to undo/buckle up the seatbelt and if I park a long way away a safe route to juggle two children and a trolley.

Not all! At a lot of shops now there is specifically a picture of a child in a buggy, I’ve enquired in a few shops and the answer has been, they are for children in buggies or who need special assistance, certainly not for the average 12 year old!

Thank you Sirzy was never sure if i can

Oh wow OP, you are being ridiculous 🤣🤣
You don’t have the monopoly on spaces, you don’t have the right to police them. The other person was correctly using them - they are for use with children up to 12 years old, as others have said.

YANBU.

the only thing worse than this is people who park in a parent and child space with a full family/2 adults in the car, and only one parent gets out, with no kids. If your kids aren’t getting out of the car, why do you need extra space

FWIW, I think parent and child bays should only be available to heavily pregnant women (think unable to get out of the car without fully opening the door pregnant), babies and toddlers up to age 5

Try having a wheelchair accessible vehicle fully signed to leave room for 2 wheelchair bound kids and old people park right up your arse or even better people park in disabled bays and very easily walk off with no viable health issue!!! I know not all disabilities are visible but come on, physical disabilities should be allowed in them bays not able bodied ?

I’m late to this thread but agree with the OP. I stopped using those spaces once my kids were both out of the toddler car seats and could sensibly walk through a car park without giving me a heart attack. I wouldn’t dream of being impatient with someone with a tiny baby who probably hasn’t fully recovered from
birth etc yet.

The worst thing that happened to me in a supermarket car park was someone parking so close to my car when I was heavily pregnant that I genuinely couldn’t get back into my vehicle to drive away… (I was massive) 😂

You are absolutely not a selfish dick for using a parent and child space when you have children with you. I would find it weird if you parked in the more dangerous areas with two kids with you! Use the p&c without a second thought please!

It's the people who park in it that don't have kids with them who are selfish dicks. I wish there was a way to report them and get them fined.

Ive run out of imagination now I'm mid thirties so I just tell everyone to go fuck themselves. Don't over complicated things.

You do have a right to be upset as I would be as well if I was in your position I have two children my DS who is 8 and DD who is 3 and I think sometimes in those situations we can jump to conclusions and sometimes not think before we open our mouths to speak, as I must admit I’ve done that on several occasions especially when it comes to my children. Personally from what you’ve described I think she was very unreasonable and probably in a hurry and didn’t want to wait and with how her child reacted to you as well in my eyes that’s not good parenting as I wouldn’t get my children involved in my arguments. She shouldn’t have spoken to you the way that she did and she should have waited until you finished as that is what I would have done, however hindsight is a swine and the best thing you could have done is to just either ignore her or like someone else said say ‘You can see that I’m busy can you give me a minute please’ as reacting the way that you did would have just wound her up even more which from your post it did as it would do me as my children are very tall for their age so I would be extremely annoyed if someone snapped that reaction at me. But I do agree with you that people do abuse those parking bays, I can remember when mine were really small I had a go at an elderly couple who pinched my child bay and they said it’s because there were no disabled bays free and they were told they were allowed to so I went into Tescos to check and they said they couldn’t care less where we parked so from then on if I couldn’t find a child bay I just parked in a disabled bay.

Why did you have to close
the door.. those spaces are wide enough for both of you surely

Oh dear! I need to confess.I parked in a
parent and child space once.No room in Blue Badge spaces.I was 70 my Father 96 x

The other person wasn’t prevented from parking, they had pulled in fine, they wanted me to shut the door so the older child could get out, I don’t know why this was needed, I have previously said because the gap allowed one door to open rather than two, but I’m not sure that was the case. I had parked in the bay fine so there was no issue there. Anyway I was focused on the task at hand and not going to leave my 3 month old unstrapped for their convenience so got on with it, the older child managed to get out fine despite my door still being open. I went round to the driver’s side to leave and she loudly said “ignorant” at me.

Good for you. They are not forceable and your need was greater in thus instance.

This is the thing that annoys me about these spaces. Why prioritise the needs of young parents over OAPs, a lot of OAPs have trouble walking.

Yep my husband is waiting for an mri on his hip and knee, walks with a stick and I have arthritis. But neither of us warrant a disabled badge. I try to find an end space where I can open my door fully which makes it easier to get out. Have to say the size of many vehicles now is ridiculous and the average parking space does not accommodate them well. I was asked to move my small car so that a chap in his BMW huge people carrier could get in his car. Not sure me shrugging and limping off to do my shopping was what he was hoping for. Oh and I was in an end of row space with only a concrete pillar to avoid while driving into it. Dickhead move maybe but God knows how he got out the car if there was a vehicle there when he arrived 🤔

And I think that’s why they were saying you we’re ignorant because you willfully ignored / failed to acknowledge anything you could do to consider people parking in the other bay because your only concern was your situation. Completely your prerogative - but a bit ignorant.