Snapped in the parent and child parking

[seize]

Juggling my 3 month old from their baby carrier trying to get them into the car seat, a car pulls in and asks me to close my door, while I’m halfway into getting my baby in their seat.

Out hops a child in school uniform about 10 years old, not help needing any help to get out, my face must have had an expression of surprise. Someone in need of this space being asked to stop what they’re doing to allow someone not in need of the space to use it. The adult said “ignorant” loudly at me. So I snapped back, “these spaces are for people with babies and children that need help getting in and out, they aren’t for older children” she snaps something back at me about not knowing how old their child is (the one that is in school uniform, fairly tall, that needed no help getting out and is now safely stood in a car park without the adult needing to have them in their line of sight) and the bratty child screams “yeah!”.

I’ve had it with these spaces, they aren’t a convenience for people that happen to have a person under the age of 16 with them. They’re for people who genuinely need the help getting them in and out and need the extra space.

I mean, be mildly annoyed about it sure. Post it on the internet though? Need a hobby love…

YANBU - about people taking advantage of these spaces, they do, they will and they can.

BUT as a mum that had 12 months between my babies and had to juggle buggies, shopping, babies etc there is ONE thing I would never ever have done and that's to engage with these people on any level. No eye contact, no shrugging, nothing... there is a high probability that these people are entitled and do not care. You have one primary job with your babies in a car park, keeping them safe and that means not witnessing negativity aggressive behaviour directed at the most important person in their lives. Let it go, life is too short and focus on how to get your groove for the carpark Olympics lol

As you’ve probably been told many times, those spaces are for 12 year olds and under. Very presumptuous of you. However asking you to shut the door when getting a baby out was unfair.

Parent and child spaces are usually reserved for people with children up to the age of about 12. Therefore you are being unreasonable.

She should have waited for you to complete getting your baby out of the car and was cheeky asking you to close your door. The child could have got out the other side

I have given up on P&C spaces, they’re not worth the aggro. I park at the back of the car park in a space with no car neighbours, near a trolley bay and leave the P&C spaces for the lazy arseholes who want to save themselves an extra 20 seconds off the walk.

To be fair if I saw someone was trying to parked I would have closed door to let them in. What we’re expecting her to do sit in the car blocking the rest of the car park whilst you finished? Only in this instance was it someone who had a 12yo - it could have been another person with. 3 month old - if your preventing someone else from parking then it’s polite to adjust your position so they too can use a free space rather than take up two spaces

Unless there are special needs involved, no child over the age of 8 needs to be using the parent and child spaces

100% with you at this one! I had 4 DC's eldest is 13 (not used a parent and child space for years with them but they are SEN but wint bolt) LO 4 (ASD and if you take your eyes off them i become an Olympic sprinter to catch them!) LO2 and the baby is 11months (yes we do have a big TV and no we aren't having anymore) and i hate it when there are no spaces and the cars in place have no baby seats or badges on display . . . Im in the double pram and a child on a 'lead' club . . . I cant go into a normal space as i need to access all 3 passanger doors (4 year old is in an adapted seat like a bigger baby seat), i dont mind of the spaces need to be used for 1 child, pregnant ladies, disabled or multiple kids aslong as they are used correctly. BUT they are provided based on trust but are openly abused😔 if someone parks with no child or badge in sight i do challenge them, i dont care if you think thats 'karen' of me, its not my fault they are too lazy to park further away!

These idiots usually have 'baby on board' and are often the most inpatient, aggressive arse holes on the road. Clearly her day was so important rather than have a bit of patience and allow others to use the parking space. Lovely example to her child too.

Totally with you op. Saw a mum and dad park in one at Asda the other day with their teenage son. Piss take! Unfortunately no age limit so people will take advantage. I think it should be for mums with small children who need help getting in and out/ might run off. I also think there should be spaces for pregnant women - I am pregnant, can hardly walk and am in a great deal of pain from awful acid reflux. Tis a man’s world!

Oh wow..this has become my absolute bug bare since becoming a parent! I have a 9 month old and pretty much everytime I go somewhere with parent & child spaces I clock not just 1 but multiple people parking in them without a child at all. The best is the local retail park..there's also a gym on the same site yet despite being supposedly fit people, they clearly cba to walk across the carpark and instead choose to park in the parent & child spaces closest to the entrance!!

If it annoys you that much then I would start parking away from the door at a quieter spot in the car park ... Theres always plenty of those in our car park. Plenty room to open doors and get buggies etc out.

The local asda near me does have age limits on their signs but im not sure people actually take any notice! I did park in some parent & child spaces when I was pregnant, logic being i was with child, just in a different capacity and was always worried about someone parking too close and not being able to get in with my bump!

Using the child locks might be helpful in this situation

Well I had my kids when there were no M&B spaces and we managed. Personally I think OAP spaces are needed as at my age you need the door wide open to be able to maneuvere yourself in/out the vehicle when things start ceasing up yet you're not classed as disabled 🤔

Talk about clutching at straws to disagree with OP. Let's use some common sense here. People misuse these spaces allll the time, doesn't make it right but it happens and it's up to the stores to fix the problem, as in meadow hall, mentioned upthread.

It is, however, an absolute dickhead move to ask a parent putting a baby in the car to close their door so their older, able-bodied kid can get out. It is. If you disagree you are purely out to wind the op up further.

💯

That would make me angry .
I have a 4 year old grandaughter and trying to fasten the belt over her is really tricky at times so I understand car doors being open etc.
I'd say someone with a child over 5 or 6 doesn't need a child space .
IIn other places my grandaughter climbs out of the car easily I am.always by her she will hold your hand .
I think parents or carers with babies & toddlers are in greater need of these spaces .
Definitely not older kids that's ridiculous.

Who was there first? Surely, the approaching vehicle must yield til the way is clear for safety?

She was rude which you mirrored but as others have said these spaces are there for people with young kids up to around 12 years old

They are meant to provide extra space for opening doors wide enough to get car seats in/out.
Make it easier and safer to load pushchairs or prams. / reduce the risk of children running into traffic in busy car parks/ let’s families closer to entrances, so parents don’t have to cross large, busy car parks with small kids.

"I think it should be for mums with small children who need help getting in and out/ might run off."

Some older children need help getting in and out or might run off.

I've had a word/told a couple of people off for parking in these bays when they have no children with them. They're the selfish fuckers. It's not just to make it more convenient for parents, it's to make it safer for children to cross the carpark.

The parent and child spaces are often close to the front, or next to a main pavemented area that leads straight to the shop. Car parks are dangerous, and basically all children (particularly under 12) have little awareness. They can be silly and aren't watching for danger. With smaller children, cars can't actually see them if they're reversing out of a space. Not having to cross an entire carpark full of moving vehicles makes it safer for them.

It's nice they make the spaces bigger, but that's a bonus of the main reason they exist.

You're being unreasonable to think that these spaces are just for people with babies.

These spaces are for children 12 and under i park in these spaces and my children are 9,10,14 and 17 and my 10year old is autistic I could park in disabled but she isn't in a chair or not able to walk so I opt for the child spaces if there's any availability as im entitled to as my children are under 12 I feel the way you was spoken to off the other lady was out of order and I wouldnt of closed my door but thinking you have the right over anyone else just because you have a baby isn't fair we've all been there and had babies ourselves it isn't easy but neither are children of school age for running out into the road etc the spaces are close to the door for the safety of children near cars.

Yea, she was an impatient dick. But, I still park in those bays with my 9 and 5 year olds (both of whom are tall for their age). Why - partly out of laziness and partly because they both swing doors out without thinking and I have to lean in to strap one of them in. Shopping with them is a mare - as is crossing a busy car park if we’re further away. Makes me a selfish dick, but they are for anyone under 12 and there are so so few other perks of parenting.