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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to report every man who lies about his height on hinge

371 replies

PoliteEagle · 19/09/2025 22:01

i've really had enough of it. Had another hinge date this week where the guy claimed to be 5'8. He was 5'5 at most, more towards 5'4. I reported his profile to hinge for lying about the height. How they expect to build a relationship on lie, I dont get it

OP posts:
FreyjaOfTheNorth · 20/09/2025 04:39

Makes a change from MNers lying about their “DH”’or “DS” height. I’ve yet to see a post here where the husband and sons are less than 6 foot tall. I never see these giants out in the wild, though.

janehopper · 20/09/2025 04:47

MoFadaCromulent · 19/09/2025 23:25

Yanbu
I'm so glad I'm not on the app scene.
Have so many friends who waste so much money on dates with women who use filters or old photos only to have a flat chested or size 12-14 rock up looking nothing like their pics.

It's just pointless, they're going to see you in person and what you actually look like and know you're over weight

Size 12! God forbid 😳

Ladydish · 20/09/2025 04:47

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:05

WTF. What is this obsession with height? It really doesn't reflect well on women

It’s not the height it’s the honesty. That said, it’s ok to not want to meet somebody’s you KNOW there won’t be a physical attraction. That might be related to height, weight, smoking, style…..anything. Just be honest. It applies to everybody. Men, woman, whatever.

Ladydish · 20/09/2025 04:53

janehopper · 20/09/2025 04:47

Size 12! God forbid 😳

To be fair to the poster…..if you know you won’t be attracted to a particular body type you should be able choose to not meet them. Doesn’t matter if that’s height, size, tattoos, hair colour….whatever You don’t HAVE to spend time with anybody but it’s very hard to make the choice when people lie or use filtered/doctored photos.

BrokenWingsCantFly · 20/09/2025 04:54

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:57

So it's OK if men say they are only interested in slim women? Somehow I think a lot of women women wouldn't be ok with that

Yes that would be ok. If your not attracted to a certain type then you just ain't. So in the same way lying about your height in the hopes to hoping someone won't notice it, lying about your weight would be wasting everyone's time too.
There are people out there that won't have these preferences, who will look at a larger lady and think she's beautiful, who will look at a man's profile with his honest shorter height and find him attractive still. Why would anyone want to date someone who thinks 'they are not my type' anyway.
People you meet in real life are more likely to look past these preferences if you naturally grow close, but with OLD all you have to go on are brief photos and whatever they fill in on a profile. By the time you get to 1st date it is unlikely you will have won someone around enough to look past their preferences, so lying only leads to awkward disappointment

Another PP couldn't understand someone having height preference but then said their preference is no kids or smoking. Others may not care about this but care about height. Their preference isn't wrong, neither is those who only want slim women, curvy women, muscle men, or slim men, tall or short. Preference is preference.

I for 1 would not want to be with someone who thought well I don't really fancy her, or like this about her, but she has a lovely personality. Everyone deserves someone who finds them attractive physically and emotionally and wouldn't want to change a thing about them surely

Ladydish · 20/09/2025 04:56

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:57

So it's OK if men say they are only interested in slim women? Somehow I think a lot of women women wouldn't be ok with that

Absolutely fine! You are attracted tomboyish are attracted to that’s why there are options to filter by height, body type etc.

kkloo · 20/09/2025 05:21

PermanentTemporary · 20/09/2025 03:39

I think you’re massively missing out… and I wouldn’t report anyone on a dating site unless they struck me as needing shopping to the police. If it’s just height, why give them that much headroom (as it were).

I don’t really blame the guys who feel like if they’re going to have to pay much more to use an app, they will do what it takes to get some actual dates out of it.

So because they want to get their monies worth you don't really blame the men who lie in order to get dates under false pretences?

It's such a sense of entitlement to think well I want to date that person but she doesn't want to date me so I'm going to lie in order to go on a date with her, just so that I get value of money for my tenner.

Lucelady · 20/09/2025 05:50

My BFF is on quite a few dating apps.

She's 5'6'' but likes tall men
Her stock phrase is' short men are so much taller when they stand on their wallet!' if they're short, funny and flush she'll date them but if they expect her to pay for them they don't get another chance. She'll go halves, that's it.

Fwiw I do have a 6'5'' husband and a 6'6'' son (not a MN lie) but I'm five ten and a short guy next to me would look silly. I'm not looking for a new Mr Luce but I attract them even at a 'whopping' size 16. Plenty out there but I wonder if it's a rural thing? Most of my boyfriends were at the Royal Agricultural College.

Tunacheesequesadilla · 20/09/2025 05:50

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:57

So it's OK if men say they are only interested in slim women? Somehow I think a lot of women women wouldn't be ok with that

Of course that's fine. I don't want to date a fat guy either.

SafeSex · 20/09/2025 06:14

MoFadaCromulent · 19/09/2025 23:25

Yanbu
I'm so glad I'm not on the app scene.
Have so many friends who waste so much money on dates with women who use filters or old photos only to have a flat chested or size 12-14 rock up looking nothing like their pics.

It's just pointless, they're going to see you in person and what you actually look like and know you're over weight

A flat chested??

Iocainepowder · 20/09/2025 06:18

So glad i’m not on the dating scene any more.

Are there still sites where you don’t have to mention your height? I’m tiny so men’s height not an issue for me (ironically married a very tall man). My DB is also very short but also has never had issues getting dates.

stayathomer · 20/09/2025 06:19

It depends whether he’s being deliberately deceptive, there’s always the chance he’s not getting replies or sitting their nervously wondering if changing his height would get more answers because the thing out there is that women like tall men (which I’ve always found ridiculous, it would be like a man saying they prefer something in women so automatically knocking out loads of potentials!!!)

ForgetMeNotRose · 20/09/2025 06:20

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:05

WTF. What is this obsession with height? It really doesn't reflect well on women

It's more about honesty isn't it? I'm not personally bothered about how tall people are. But back in my single days when I did OLD, when someone showed up who was much shorter than they said they were, it was obvious immediately they were a liar. Totally pointless lie.

iloveeverykindofcat · 20/09/2025 06:32

I'm not the slightest bit bothered about height, the only man I considered marrying was 5"4, same as me. But lying about it is absolutely baffling. Its not like weight or bank account - we can see your height.

My friend's husband actually is 6"4 and the most mischevious thing he does is tell his fellow men he's 6"2 😂

Lavenderbluex · 20/09/2025 06:34

Good for you OP.

It used to really piss me off too. With all the physical and beauty expectations men expect of woman, I have no guilt in saying I will only date taller men (of course, not to their faces!)

I’m 5’8 and can’t help it that I am not sexually attached to shorter men. I’d rather be single forever that be sexually active with a man shorter than me. Everyone is entitled to their preferences and shouldn’t be coerced into something out of guilt.

I once went on a date with a one who claimed to be 6”3, I had 3 inch heels on and he was shorter than me. Never said anything to him but of course I never saw him again.

Why do they expect you to want to build a relationship with a liar? It’s like when woman do not mention theyre a single mother until a few dates in.

Before anyone jumps on me, I never used to use filters on my photos and they were all from within the last few months. Some without makeup on.

iloveeverykindofcat · 20/09/2025 06:37

There's some kind of silent agreement going on to exaggerate all heights, but especially men. The average height of a man in the UK is 5"10 and the average height of a woman is 5"4. Co-incidentally these are my brother's and my own heights. The number of people who tell us we "must" be taller is insane.

SparklyGlitterballs · 20/09/2025 06:41

If it keeps happening to you then introduce it into the conversation before you meet up..."Is there anything in your profile you were less truthful about, eg height?"

Explain the reason you're asking and be clear whether something is a deal breaker.

ZenNudist · 20/09/2025 06:42

Thattimeofthenight · 19/09/2025 22:15

God almighty, all the women whose photos don’t reflect their actual faces or weight 🤨

Most people on these apps lie to get their foot in the door.

Reporting his profile is ridiculous.

This but also use it as a filter for liars

sydneyr · 20/09/2025 06:43

I don’t understand why they lie about things on their profile (not just height) it’s not going to make them unattractive or put us off if their honest but a relationship based on lies will just fall apart

i never reported profiles for this when I was dating but looking back maybe I should have. It’s basically deceiving the other party

TryingAgainAgainAgain · 20/09/2025 06:45

Tigerthatcametobrunch · 19/09/2025 22:20

My boyfriend of 18 months lied in his. I wanted someone who wasn't going to get snippy if I was taller than them in heels. As it is I'm taller than him in heels, but he knows not to complain, if he was as advertised we wouldn't have a problem.

Have you talked about the fact that he lied?

Butchyrestingface · 20/09/2025 06:46

I didn't actually know my height til I was past 30 and measured by a nurse (can't recall why).

I thought I was around 5ft 2-3". But I didn't actually KNOW as I had not previously been measured. So if I'd put 5ft 3" on a dating app, would I be lying or just living in hope? Grin

Doodlingsquares · 20/09/2025 06:47

iloveeverykindofcat · 20/09/2025 06:37

There's some kind of silent agreement going on to exaggerate all heights, but especially men. The average height of a man in the UK is 5"10 and the average height of a woman is 5"4. Co-incidentally these are my brother's and my own heights. The number of people who tell us we "must" be taller is insane.

Edited

Id agree with this. Some women seem to think of 6ft as some sort of typical mens height benchmark but its not, its a pretty tall bloke.
I think people are poor at estimating height amd what they think of as 6ft is probably more like 5'10 or 5'11 really.

TryingAgainAgainAgain · 20/09/2025 06:49

cygnusgenie · 19/09/2025 23:57

So it's OK if men say they are only interested in slim women? Somehow I think a lot of women women wouldn't be ok with that

Do you not realise that men do this constantly on the apps? Require a certain size or body shape.

ThatCyanCat · 20/09/2025 06:50

I've never done OLD (which is probably why I love reading about it so much) but my understanding is that lying is rife, from both men and women. I remember articles years ago about misleading pictures (anyone remember the MySpace angle?) but now filters are so ubiquitous, you don't even need to crane your neck and tilt the camera.

I don't think there's much you can do about it.

ChrisMartinsKisskam · 20/09/2025 06:52

PoliteEagle · 20/09/2025 00:07

Ahaha that’s a good idea.

Yep the door frame trick 😂

standard door frame is 6ft 6inches

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