to ask you to tell us something you’d never admit IRL

[GooseAndSandals]

I’ll start with one of my less dark ones. I didn’t care when my father died.

Couldn't agree more - other people's illnesses are just boring.

Love this, gonna work it into my routine stat. 😆

I absolutely love this, please update at Christmas with what happened! I would just ask her if she has ever thought about you, and see what she says?! So fascinating the impact she had on you. Like chemistry but beyond / something bigger. Hope Christmas goes well!

I don’t want to be ambitious - I think being ambitious is overrated. Life is tiring and I just want to stay at home for a year

"Go to a GP or get counseling" for mental health. No other advice could sound more indifferent than this.

My life’s a bloody mess, can’t begin or don’t want to share at this point but good luck to us all

Aww they'll be having the time of their life, honestly 🤗

Sorry but that was NOT an innocent ‘game’…. 😞😞

How about pull yourself together, stop feeling sorry for yourself, you've just got to get on with it?
😬
At least GPs have stopped saying that and people have heard of counselling.
It's a small improvement, but it's not nothing.

Name change for this one but I will never regret it. I took 50 quid from an envelope in the drawer next to my neighbours deathbed. His family didn’t give a shit about him or his beloved pets, and introduced themselves to me by saying “I don’t know how you can sit in his house, the state of it”. He was a lovely but extremely proud 76 year old gentleman who suffered from very poor health and lived for his pets. Despite being barely able to walk and having a lung disease he cycled to the shops every week to buy fresh meat to cook for the pets.

I donated the 50 quid to an animal charity, it was never going to be for myself but I figured he would like that. Obviously haven’t told anyone because it doesn’t sound good but I’m glad I did it.

I’m sorry but this with your username made me laugh 😆

No, I don't think it was innocent. You play hide and seek with kids, you touch tongues with grown ups ❤

I’m terrified I’ll never meet anyone/have sex ever again

One more: I’ve suspected my father isn’t my biological father since my late teens. My paternal aunt used to always make comments about how I looked like my mums side, and a man on the bus told me how I looked just like a family who lived local to where my mum grew up followed by “I’d investigate my family tree if I were you”. I was too shocked at the time to reply but I secretly wish it was true. There is mental illness and addiction in my fathers family and my fathers lack of interest in me as a child hurt.

Wow! This needs a thread of its own!

Do you think your father knew, hence his lack of interest?

I have never actually wondered about whether my father knew or not, he died when I was still young (21) so I couldn’t ask him even if I wanted to. My mum is deeply religious so I can’t imagine her cheating on him but certain things just don’t add up. My only other sibling is a decade older than me and I am the only one in the family to have had health issues that would usually be genetic. My paternal cousin and her husband made comments last year about 23 And Me tests ‘being really popular in the States’ (where she lives), that I should take one to find out if I also have some gene which would put me at risk for breast cancer, and how among their peers ‘if someone doesn’t want to take one people will almost ask what they are hiding’, I found it a bit odd but laughed it off.

That was really unkind of your cousin

100% I was looking forward to a giggle 🥴

I feel similar to you, a friend of mine was unbearable online about how it was the worst day of her life and she didnt know how she would cope losing her 96 year old grandparent when she was in her 40s, she posted so much about it, but 70 is not really elderly.

My mum is nearly 70 and has just been diagnosed with cancer, she seems really young still, is out every weekend, holidays loads and worked from age 15 till retirement a few years ago. Losing a parent when they are 40 or 50 is tragic in comparison of course but my mum should have had potentially 20-25 years left if she is similar to the rest of our family so it is horrible.

Just confirms to me that men can never be trusted

Maybe I’m being thick but you ( a woman?) had an affair as well?

and as for the person you had an affair with somehow confirming to you that men can never be trusted because he’s messaging you despite having a girlfriend…. Well he was fine having an affair with a married woman, you, so I’d say that was probably a good indicator he was not exactly the most trustworthy of individuals @Hidingbehindthechaos
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either way… what a shit show

Oh its certainly a shit show.

DH and I weren't actually living together at that point, we were married with children still and did get back together. He was with a long term GF and it was on its last legs and he split up with her soon after. Not saying it was right in anyway but I guess I thought he was happy in a newish relationship with a lovely person but still after a year he would stray and jeopardise everything with her. I shut it down as I am with DH and thats what I meant really. I naively believed we did it because we were not with/ending things with our partners but clearly not on his part, I should know better at my age!

So you and your Husband have split up in the past?

I guess I thought he was happy in a newish relationship with a lovely person but still after a year he would stray and jeopardise everything with her.

he had an affair with a married woman with kids OP AND he cheated on long term girlfriend I mean…. It’s hardly surprising he’s doing it with his latest squeeze

We had some time out, I still consider it an affair as whilst we technically weren't together it wasnt over I guess as we got back together, it was a really short break.

I dont need any judgement, I'm fully aware of the situation and how bad it was.

I am struggling with her not knowing, however I know no one thanks you for telling them. It remains a secret for now. And it isnt surprising, I was clearly in a alternate universe in my brain.

Me too. I came on to one of these threads once to confess that I preferred instant coffee to "real" coffee, but took a look at the carnage on the thread and slunk back out!