Awful date. Tried to embarrass me the whole evening...

[brackenbury]

Is it really that bad out there? I went on a date last Friday and I'm still pissed about this issue - largely, because he had the nerve to follow up and try again.

We were talking prior to meeting for a fair 2-3 weeks prior to Summer commitments making an actual date in person a bit tough. He seemed perfectly normal/lovely.

I work as a Dr - and he asked me (on the date) exactly what kind of Dr I am. I told him a paediatrician (which is the truth).

He then - for the rest of the evening, proceeded to laugh at me and kept calling me a 'pedo' - due to it sounding similar to me being a paediatrician. I didn't laugh, but scoffed a bit initially. Then he kept going on and on and on - to the point where he wouldn't let up! I was mortified. It felt like he just crapped all over my work - which is tough at the best of time - but also like he was trying to take me down a peg or 10.

Needless to say, I left the date not wanting to see him again.

He then started texting me over the weekend and shortening the name to 'P' - to make it seem 'cute' and less offensive.

Honestly, I give up. I've had a few years of enormous grief and stress - and decided to try dating again, but I'm irrationally disenchanted.

He wants to go on a second date. I know I should just block and move on, but part of me wants to respond to him and let him know that he needs to grow up and stop being so juvenile. Should I not bother?

He's 43 years old, FFS!! I know this is a petty reason to post - but I'm just irritated that I wasted my time.

He should have been In awe of you, not making the most puerile ‘joke’ imaginable and then repeating it, it’s beyond belief.

I’m sorry this happened to you. Block him.

Next time, remember you don’t have to continue the date - if it’s awful you can just leave.

And what oh so important job did this w⚓️ have?

Just block. He showed you no respect, do none needed. Or tell him reason why.

I once went on date who kept referring to me as a nurse. I am an AHP. I corrected him a few times on text. In the days he still kept calling me a nurse. Again corrected him. He says it was all the same. I left as said if he can’t get the basics right what’s the point.

6 months later I got a D picture asking me how his favourite nurse was!!

He just sounds really childish and thick TBH. That's not a funny joke at all. The fact that he thought it was funny is worrying. The fact that he then couldn't read the room and he persisted in making his stupid joke makes him a complete idiot.

Just say, I'm going to call you P too, but in your case it means Prick. Then block.

Did you express utter disgust?

Anything you say to explain will result in him saying "can't you take a joke" (which is what bullies say, of course). Block and be done with him.

I think a really important question is why did you stay?? You can leave at any time, you don't have to be polite.

There are a lot of men who can’t handle women being well-educated, highly qualified and well-paid in important jobs. They have to try subjugate them somehow.

I work as a consultant psychiatrist, and one of the male nurses was chasing me for years. I had zero interest so nothing ever happened. One night, at a work night out, he admitted he wasn’t particularly interested in me but wanted the “thrill” of knowing that while I was senior at work, he’d had me on my knees sucking his cock- it was all a power play for him as I was better educated, better paid and in authority at work.

Well he doesn't sound very bright but you sat through a whole date with the dickhead rather than walking the second time he called you a pedo.

If you tell him why he can rationalise your rejection by telling himself you have no sense of humour because obviously he's hilarious.

Block him and move on. Leave him to wonder where he went wrong.

Just out of interest, what does he do?

NEXT

Definitely a power play, tell him where to go. Only weak men are intimidated by strong confident women.
What does this wonderful specimen of manhood do for a living himself?

@sammylady37 thats outrageous!! He should have been hauled in front of the NMC for that!
I am a nurse, a specialist now, and when I was a student (!) nurse, I had a boyfriend tell me that all I did was babysit grown-ups. He made sure to mention it every time I passed an exam or a placement. I wasn’t even qualified and he made sure I knew he didn’t take me seriously.
He was an out of work actor who found a body in Taggart once.

OP doesn't need to tell him anything. She should block him and forget it ever happened.

Suggest a pub far out in the sticks..
Then don't show.
Text him precisely why you stood him up. He can reflect on his being a twat on the drive home.
Then block and delete

Seriously, was he a bit simple?

What does he do?
It’s really weird and odd to be calling you a pedo in public, quite damaging too.

Revolting.

He sounds AWFUL and you deserve soooo much better. I would tell him why you found his behaviour so unappealing/unfunny/unattractive as clearly has no clue which makes it even worse!! Like others have said, he’s trying to bring you down - he can’t cope with the fact that you are more intelligent and, I assume, more successful. This humour is what 9 year old boys (might) find funny.

Did you tell him to stop during the date? That it wasnt funny?

Sounds thick as shit, don't even reply op just block and delete!
Have you heard of The haystack dating method? I think it would really suit you.

He said he was head of sales (for a Fintech company).