DP lied about his holiday allowance and we can’t go away

[Takethat88]

I’m feeling a bit fed up…I’ve been with DP since mid 2023.

I knew when we met that he had an annual solo trip to Thailand every winter, and was planning on it again in 2024. Fine - but using 3 weeks of his holiday allowance meant our chances to go away together were limited as he also turned a 3 day stag do in Prague into an extended week long trip.

This year, he told me he would shorten his Thailand trip to 2 weeks so we could have a week away in September. When it came to us looking to book this in July, he told me out of nowhere he had ‘forgotten’ he has a friends trip to Berlin in December as one of them is celebrating a landmark birthday! So due to other days he has booked here and there over the year, he doesn’t have a week spare for us to go away!

I even suggested joining him in Thailand as I’ve never been but he scoffed at the idea and doesn’t think it’s my cup of tea.

Am I wrong to think that if my partner can’t prioritise a holiday with me after 2 years, he needs a big ultimatum?

That was my first thought too…….he sounds really evasive and dodgy tbh

Oh dear 🤦🏼‍♀️

Yep, and if you pull the other one OP, it's got bells on it.

Sadly I think for some women it’s more do I prefer to be at the bottom, or nothing at all, so they take bottom;

this Guy though, he only reduced the three weeks to go away with his mates, lied to her it was for her, then lied and said he forgot. Then going on his shagathon, the fact he won’t take hee tells her everything about what he’s doing. He’s off for his annual Xmas pressie to himself.

Would love to know what he does in Thailand for 2/3w on his own

Personally it would be over for me. If you’re in a serious relationship holidays together should be prioritised . It’s ok to go away with friends but not all the time. If I were you I’d book somewhere to go by yourself or with a friend xx

My colleague used to go to Thailand on a golf holiday. He also told another colleague that his favourite bit was getting a ‘fanny wash’. A FW is where a prostitute lathers you up and then ‘washes’ you all over using her fanny. How lovely.

FW Colleague was a family man and a committed golfer…

A person that loves to travel doesn’t go to the same place every year without more reason than food and weather

That is so funny. How do you know this ? If this is the case why doesn’t he want you there with him? That sounds like great fun.

I think that Thailand is a side issue. The main one is that he doesn't want to holiday with you, and that he prefers to do other things.

I find the miscalculation of his annual leave nonsense. If he was that invested he'd have made sure he had enough. It's not that difficult.

You should leave him!
PP who doesnt know you or you DP has decided he is off shagging, she obviously know all about it.

Three weeks in Thailand without his wife? Are you serious?

It's massage-shag-kinky Heaven; single men go all the time, those that are so inclined that is.

What sort of a man have you got involved with for goodness sake, how old are you, most of us know about it.

There was a woman in a facebook group who recently got together with another poster, a man, who had similar Thailand links. He love bombed her for a while but she found out eventually and gave him his marching orders.

Of course he is going to tell you it's all above board.

You can do better.

He island hops, enjoys the sights and the food but doesn’t engage in any if the seedier stuff 😉😉

My exact thought!!

OMG!.
Are there females out there that still think men going on holiday to Thailand alone, are going for the scenery?.
Just to be clear, he’s told you he’s not a sex tourist, he’s not going because he can get sex with little girls!.
I dispair, are some women still so bloody stupid and gullible?.

Talk about a low bar accepting scraps.

Yup, annual 3 week trip to Thailand= you need to get yourself tested for STDs I am afraid

Tell him you’ve booked to go when he’s going as you love him and want to be more open to his kind of holiday. Watch his face.

If he wants to see your booking say no, you’ve covered it. No need to fuss over the minutiae.

Beaches, temples, culture, designer shops, tuk tuk rides, exotic food. Lady boys, sex clubs, prostitutes are DEFINITELY NOT on an agenda.
Wonder what's in his photos on his phone or computer

Exactly that’s what Thailand is all about young children being sexually exploited and very young women/girls.

And of the same gender as he is

Youre coming across as an absolute mug here OP

I can only assume that you are making all this up. What a creepy way to say ducks in a row. Very pathetic to come on mumsnet and post such a load of old tripe. Any person knows Thailand, Philippines etc are for sex tourists, particularly very young kids. Why would a man and his friends go there every year? You even say he likes his time alone, he isn’t alone. He’s with his friends and his prostitutes. If this is real, the use of his annual leave is the least of your problems.

Came to say exactly this!

Solo trips to Thailand every year that won't be your thing. I'd be very suspicious of that. Sexual exploitation is rife there, including child exploitation.

Came here to say this…