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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Adult man swearing at a toddler

252 replies

AnnaSunshine · 07/09/2025 18:49

We have a family membership to Kew Gardens. I know it’s expensive, but we go almost every weekend to let our children run around and enjoy being outside.

My youngest child is 18 months old. He is in that gorgeous stage where he had just started to talk a little more coherently and where he absolutely loves running around and climbing. He can follow simple instructions….. when he wants to!

If you know Kew, we were over by the Japanese gardens. My eldest thinks this is the most beautiful place that she’s ever seen.

This area has some gravel sections where the stones are raked. They are not to be walked on.

As you can imagine, my son (who was with my husband) immediately ran into the middle of one of these areas. My husband called to my son (which he thought was a hilarious game) and then my husband went to go and scoop him up. Cue toddler screaming “No daddy!”.

At this point a man in his thirties sitting on a bench with a woman turns around and tells us “you cannot walk on that.” I relied, “we know, but he’s a toddler and he doesn’t understand that yet.”

To be clear, my husband has already removed my son.

The man then continues “What is wrong with you Karen? Parent your children. You need to have boundaries. What is wrong with you? You are a terrible parent!”

This is with escalating agitation. My son, still with his Dad, starts to cry because there is a man shouting at his mum.

I should have walked away, but I said still very calmly:

”Karen‽ He is not even two. He is not yet cognitively developed enough to understand this.”

To which the man stood up, turned to my son and shouted “You little sod, don’t go on the f-ing stones!”

I said “You are shouting at a toddler. For when you have calmed down, we forgive you for this.” And, I know pettily, walked across the stones myself to go and hug my child.

Was I unreasonable in this? Kew is made for people of all ages. We absolutely respect it, and would have taken my son off the gravel regardless of people being around, but I cannot comprehend this man‘s actions.

I’ve got thick skin, so tell me how it is if I’m wrong.

OP posts:
Unexpectedlysinglemum · 15/09/2025 15:39

The man’s a virtue signalling prick

Unexpectedlysinglemum · 15/09/2025 15:41

Zwellers · 14/09/2025 20:02

Good job it wasn't a road or a pool. Are you normally this lax with your child. No remorse for the destruction your beautiful child has caused to the Japanese garden ethier, compounded by your petty behaviour in adding to the destruction.

This is ridiculous , they were in a safe garden and it’s dad who was closest to grab him anyway. Walking on stones doesn’t harm a child or a garden. This is so dramatic.

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