For not paying half when I'm leaving.

[Cuppatealover]

Very emotional and awful time right now. I'll try to keep it as short as possible.
Been through a hell of a year. Decided to move in with partner in January. A week after signing for the rented house we found out I was pregnant. All good.
Moved in end of March and partner had paid to get whole house blinds fitted, new floors through the house and appliances for kitchen. We agreed I would pay him back my half for these.
Fast forward and relationship has just gradually got worse and broken down. I had a termination of pregnancy in May due to various reasons which I know he resents me for as he wanted the baby.
Had a row the other week as I told him I do not want to be in this relationship anymore and how do we go about the split re house and associated costs. He still expects half for the blinds, flooring and appliances (I haven't paid anything yet) but intends to stay in the house and won't move. Has said if I'm unhappy then I should move. Which I agree with. But I've said I'm not paying half for things he is keeping of he is staying in the house. I can't take half a fridge freezer or blinds!
I have now found a house and told him after looking for months. Got two cats so it's incredibly difficult to find a rental. Now I've told him it's erupted into a huge row about how I'm trying to worm my way out of paying him back and putting him in financial hardship because he wouldn't have paid for those things if he knew I wasn't going to pay half.

Oh my god, its so fucking infuriating when people don't READ THE FUCKING OPs POSTS!

Are you joint tenants? Because you are legally bound to the rental agreement unless the landlord releases you from the AST.

Op making your post at face value and not researching past “takeaways” post or trying to date your pregnancy at time of termination. You have made some very difficult decisions and i think you are in pain. Mourning the loss of the future you thought you were going to be living.

for those reasons I say just leave. It may be perceived as unfair or screwing him over or you are a female cocklodger but I think your future is very precarious due to recent events and this debt you have now. You cannot take on anymore debt. He will have to find a way to pay for the home improvements and you will have to find a way forward with your MH and finances slowly but surely improving.

Back to the point of the thread .. have you tried saying you will pay a reasonable percentage £150 - £300 5 -10% and see if he will agree to that.
Seemd better to try and leave as amicably as possible rather than just reusing to pay anything.
Of course if he is determined to be difficult then you can't help it.

We are but they have said that if one persons leaves they will then do a financial assessment on the remaining tenant as to their affordability to stay in the property. So I can leave. We have looked in to it.

They are living in a 5-year term "Rent to Buy" property - it's not an ordinary AST in a private rental. What isn't clear - because OP hasn't answered this, despite my asking - is if only her STBX signed the agreement or if it's in their joint names? She also hasn't answered if she paid half the deposit.
ETA OP's just answered that they are joint tenants.

I have and he won't have it

I HAVE answered about the deposit. There wasn't one.

Cuppatealover · Today 15:13

I HAVE answered about the deposit. There wasn't one.

Don’t pay as you no longer have use of them, the appliances are now in his ownership, he can sell them when needed. He can’t make you pay anything, even legally I doubt it.

Incase anyone needs a further breakdown as they clearly aren't resding my responses.

Moved in April. Rent to buy property. NO DEPOSIT.

Partner paid for white goods, flooring and blinds for the house. We said we would split it 50/50.

I haven't paid anything towards that yet because of debts and having limited disposable income.

Relationship has irrevocably broken down and I am looking to move as he will not move out. He himself has said "The sooner the better". And other comments calling me a "deadbeat baby killer" (after termination of our baby in May "You're rotten" "Even your brother knows you're shit".

I want to leave. Have found a property. And he still wants half for the goods he paid for even though he intends to stay and eventually buy the property.

NB: I pay half towards all of our joint bills and current rent.

I hope that summarises and clears things up.

Yes, sorry, I can see that you did answer the deposit question and I missed that.

Ignore the haters. Move out. Don't pay for stuff that's not yours. He will be living there, maybe buying the place, and enjoying the flooring and white goods etc.

Good luck x

It's housing association rent to buy so no deposit. I have absolutely no reason to lie. Bizarre.

I would say try and leave asap, lie if you have to, but get out.

Please tell me you haven’t told him where you are going?

And I’m sorry you are getting hassle on the thread.

YANBU to refuse to pay, as he had a choice- stay and pay, or leave. He decided you should leave. So he gets to stay and pay.

Your relationship has broken down, many things you agreed and planned are not happening, paying for the goods is just one of them.

Maybe pay a contribution, not half just to cover your side. You do not need to pay him but say a 5-10% of the amount you owe will cover some of the costs you did agree to.

Totally agree you do not need to pay him half.

To be fair OP, if this had been your opening post you'd have received different responses (it's been a bit of a drip-feed but things are clearer now).
So, has your STBX passed the affordability check? Is it certain that he can remain in the property alone?

You seem to be getting a hard time on this thread OP.

I think you are being reasonable under the circumstances. You offered to pay in full and keep the house and goods. You offered to pay an amount towards the goods. You offered to pay for the white goods (and get to take them).

If you had paid at the outset I think it would be reasonable to be asking for some of that money back given that you would not be keeping any of it (as he won't let you).

So I think it's reasonable not to pay what you initially agreed given how much the circumstances have changed. You barely made use of the stuff and you won't now get to use it any further. He gets full use of them.

I wish you the best for your move and your future, I hope that once you are out he won't harass you for the money. Perhaps as a gesture of goodwill you could transfer a small amount to his bank account or leave the cash (e.g. the £150 or 10 per cent) suggested up thread then you can leave in good faith.

Best of luck

Don’t pay. He’s going to continue to benefit from these items and you’re not. At best, offer him maybe 10% of the cost (you were only going to pay 50% anyway) to cover the short time that you have had use of the blinds, fridge etc.