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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To dislike my husband masturbating in bed?

362 replies

justabigdisco · 30/08/2025 18:30

I was woken last night by the bed shaking and my husband heavy breathing. I asked him WTF he was doing and he said ‘just trying to get comfy in bed’ however it was clear he was wanking next to me while I slept. There have been other episodes where I’ve been woken up and thought ‘is he…?’ but never been sure until last night.

I haven’t said anything to him yet but have been thinking about it all day. He has a higher sex drive than me and I know this frustrates him, but AIBU to find it a bit gross and disrespectful?

OP posts:
CATomas · Yesterday 15:12

You should join in, one way or the other. Make mutual wanking a regular event. Great turn on to watch each other and talk about it.

EstherGreenwood63 · Yesterday 15:56

Herbert alert...

PistachioTiramisu · Yesterday 19:15

Bloody disgusting - if a man HAS to do this, go to the bathroom Yuck!

PistachioTiramisu · Yesterday 19:15

CATomas · Yesterday 15:12

You should join in, one way or the other. Make mutual wanking a regular event. Great turn on to watch each other and talk about it.

It really is not - horrible.

Illegally18 · Yesterday 19:28

InterestedDad37 · 30/08/2025 18:59

Call him a wanker and go back to sleep 🙂

😆

TankFlyBossW4lk · Yesterday 20:11

whitewineandsun · 30/08/2025 18:34

I honestly don't see the problem. It's his bed too, and you were sleeping. But you're bound to get support. People on here seem to think men should hide away in the bathroom like teenage boys.

This

Pedallleur · Yesterday 20:20

What happened to posh wanks? Not Victoria but where the man supposedly wanks into a condom.

TheHateIsNotGood · Yesterday 20:27

Man;s gotta do what a man;s gotta do. Don't have a penis myself but understand they have 'hydraulics' and need some relief/pressure releasing every so often.

Probably as inconvenient as having tits and periods. 6 of 1 and all that.

EstherGreenwood63 · Today 08:29

TheHateIsNotGood · Yesterday 20:27

Man;s gotta do what a man;s gotta do. Don't have a penis myself but understand they have 'hydraulics' and need some relief/pressure releasing every so often.

Probably as inconvenient as having tits and periods. 6 of 1 and all that.

Chinny etc

daisyydaisyy · Today 08:53

BrightLightTonight · 30/08/2025 19:01

I’d join in 😁

Show quote history

Absolutely same I’d find this quite the turn on!

Whatifitallgoesright · Today 09:00

I don't see the problem. Maybe he couldn't sleep and a wank would help. Checking with your partner before you have a wank is a bit grim.

HumberSquid · Today 09:33

thebabayaga · 31/08/2025 11:30

They're not having sex. He's wanking beside his sleeping wife. You have incredibly low standards.

Show quote history

Or quite possibly you are just very odd? Bed is a perfectly normal place to masturbate.

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