Currently in Turkey, met a guy…

[theoneortwo]

And I know they say ‘people come along when you least expect it’ but I never ever thought this would happen to me.

im 29, British, recently I came out of a long term relationship and I am currently on holiday with my family.

I’ve met a lovely Turkish man whilst here. Completely unexpectedly, he was working on one of the tours we went on 4 days ago.

I know it sounds silly and cliche, but as soon as I saw him it’s like I just knew I needed to get to know him. We didn’t speak much on the trip itself since he was obviously busy working - but after when he was showing us the photos he’d taken, we swapped numbers and have been chatting ever since.

He has asked to take me for dinner tomorrow evening (locally in the resort town we are staying in) my mum is saying go for it, but my dad seems to have reservations and is telling me not to be so stupid and naive..

This man hasn’t shown me any red flags or given me reason to distrust him.

Im kind of in the mindset that I’m here on holiday, it’s probably not going to progress.. so let’s see what happens?

has anybody else ever been in this situation, meeting a guy abroad / getting to know somebody from a different country?

I know there are huge complex loopholes and issues IF we did get to know each other more and develop a relationship - due to distance etc.

would love to know thoughts please, as I’m really in two minds.

Thank you ☺️

Right!

Love a fairytale ending, personally.

Are you okay? You seem hugely riled up at the fact your narrow-minded views have been called out… 🤔

Well I for one love this thread. Congratulations @theoneortwo !

Or maybe he is asking your parents to see if they are gullible?

You need to take off the rose tinted specs OP.

I think it would have been all the better as an AMA though, and interesting.

❤️

Now that you have made an accusation against me, I expect you to back it up with proof. Show me the proof.

If you don’t show me the proof, I expect an apology.

I’ll wait.

There is classier ways to prove a point than pretending being a woman in distress.
It's immoral and goes against what this forum is all about.
Maybe you are right. Maybe what you did is an elegant way of proving a point.
I'm reporting the thread and let MNHQ decide.

Great it worked out for you! It also worked out for an Australian friend visiting here - met her DH and after two years here are now going to spend a few years in her country. A Polish friend met her Portuguese DH on holiday and have ended up here.
But I’d say for most it doesn’t - not Turkish men, but anyone met on a holiday. I’ve met three English guys when on holiday and had little flings with them, all starry eyed and wow how amazing that we met etc. Only to go home and somehow the daily grind and absence of hot sun and carefree days and it fizzles out fast. Or a guy I met in France, or that Irish guy or that Spanish guy… some it was just a few days flirtation, others a bit more. Most holiday flings are …holiday flings! I think what got most people on here concerned was that you seem to have fantasised a whole future before the first date! They were just urging caution as you appeared all to ready to be swept off your feet.

I disagree with that. My son in law phoned my husband to ask his permission to marry our daughter. I thought it was lovely and showed respect.

I think you owe your DH an apology for this thread, OP. You've deliberately goaded posters into sharing racist and xenophobic sentiments towards his fellow countrymen for what – to prove how much you really love him and that he's a decent bloke? Warped.

Please be careful. Have you not seen many TV programmes and media reports about women who've gone this route before and it doesn't end well. They're either duped out of money, jilted or used as means to get UK visa. Sorry to be so harsh but it's better to know about this especially as you've just come out of long term relationship. Your dad is right

Good idea.

Really? I'm not the sharpest tool, granted. But went out with a German guy I met in Antalya for about three years. Best three years of my life. Only broke up because of my habit of trolling the interwebs - in my bikini- in pursuit of racist responses. Heinze proposed. Gave me 57 varieties of ring. True fact dat.

You went to all that trouble just to catch people out by writing an original post that suggested that there were possible red flags to going doolally over a perfect stranger and fantasising a future with him. Then coming down hard on people who took the bait and flagged up that you were putting yourself in a vulnerable position, which you would have been if the op as written was true.

If you had really written this in real time, as it happened, I doubt you would be revealing that you thought there would be a future in it because that would be total madness and you would know that. You might fantasise about that (many women do fantasise about weddings etc after meeting someone promising - it's natural to do that) but you would probably keep it to yourself. You would only have turned to Mumsnet if you suspected there were red flags. You got the responses that you anticipated because your op was written to solicit that.

This post would have been more honest if you had just shared your good fortune from the off and told us how happy you are and that relationships that start this way can sometimes work out, and that you were posting because you wanted to counter the usual narrative about the perils of "holiday romances."

No. It showed that he thought control of your daughter's future was not with her, or even you, but the patriarch.

Happy to share any answers you'd like scrutinised. Ask away....

Exactly. She’s also, in her blinkered vision, accused EVERYONE who doesn’t agree with her posting this scam on here as thinking the same, that we’re all racists and narrow minded.

She’s accused me of being one and I want the proof.

Same !

Those are excellent points, @CatHealy .
That would definitely have been better.

This 100% !!

OP could’ve posted this in AMA, that would’ve actually made a good thread. (The honest story, I mean. Not the weird uno reverse 😂)

Don't rise to the bait, guys. This isn't Yahoo Answers (RIP).