Taylor Swift engagement - puzzled

[LouisaJG]

I’m in my 30s and so unreasonable to be posting/caring about this on every level. BUT. I didn’t see a post. So…

AIBU to be puzzled that the man Taylor Swift has finally decided to settle down with is so different to the type she has seemed to date pretty consistently through her 20s and 30s up to then? She seemed so keen on soft, arty, mainly British boys - and now she’s gone for the direct opposite. Is it because her previous long relationship with a soft, arty British boy (Joe Alwyn) didn’t go the distance and so she decided she really needed to change her type if she wanted marriage and kids? Is it a fairly cynical marketing reaction to the current political situation in the States (no idea if TK is actually a Republican but he looks like someone who could appeal to Republicans, very much unlike Joe Alwyn)? Is it just a return to her American, country roots? What gives? I’m her age and I just can’t imagine my tastes changing as dramatically as that.

We used to like the same type of man, and now I feel like I don’t know her any more (I know, I know, I know) 🤣

My childhood best friend was a vegan, protest-attending, very alternative surfer who only dated boys with long hair and mostly played in bands. She ended up married to a former marine, current armed response guy with a crew cut and biceps bigger than her waist 😅 People change I guess.

My DH is the absolute polar opposite to the boyfriends I had before I met him. It’s not that strange to me.

Neither of them need a PR relationship. He's worth 70m on his own and had a successful podcast in the US with his brother before all this.

I suspect it stuck because they had a conversation early on where she said look, I have cameras on me when I go to the gym, get on/off a plane, enter or leave a building - plus you'll get a load of shit in the media about how I'll write songs about you - and he said, bring it on. I think he said once that if she can be cool with the attention he should be able to deal with it himself!

Unfortunately almost all of her previous boyfriends acted like they were embarrassed to be dating her like Jake G/Matty H/Calvin Harris and of course Joe. I can't really remember any apart from poor Tom Hiddleston who would even admit it!

So all Left = good, all Right = bad.
What a very sad way to live.

I don’t think bisexuality really has anything to do with types. A close friend of mine is bisexual, her type whether male or female is bookish and preppie. You can see the throughline.

I find something very off with him.. I don't think he's genuine. I think it's in his eyes.

I think the parasocial relationship people have with this woman is absolutely bizarre. You don’t know her, you don’t know her type, her personality (despite what she puts on for the camera.. anything really; and frankly it’s absolutely none of our business.

Whilst some people have a “type” I don’t think everyone does, or rather I think the common traits are not so obvious. Alternatively one could hypothesis that TS history wasn’t working for her so she sought something different. I don’t think it’s about arty/sporty or Brit/US. He’s a very handsome muscular sportsman, he’s successful and confident and he makes her feel feminine and looked after. It seems to me SO obvious why he’s a better match than Joe Alwyn

100% agree Travis is so proud to be her BF, fiancé and show her off.

I am not in the least romantic but i went to bed with a smile after reading about their engagement.
Just the way he looks at her ! and she seems so comfortable with him, their billions don't seem to come into it ,their relationship seems so simple and genuine and i think they are thanking their lucky stars that their paths met.

I really hope this is the real thing for both of them, and i can't believe i'm saying this but i am looking forward to the wedding !

My husband is the polar opposite to my exes. We met and fell in love, it's most likely the same for them. Not really something to overthink.

Honestly the best marriages I see is where the man thinks he’s punching. And is. And knows it. Forever.

I'm more puzzled as to why that made headline news.

Wasn’t it pretty much confirmed as a PR stunt with the leaked documents confirming the plan for their break up? Seems suspicious they’re now conveniently engaged….

Is there a link to this story about leaked documents discussing a break up?

Loads of people end up marrying someone who's nothing like their usual "type".

If it helps, OP, I always went for arty, floaty, long-haired types as a teen. Met my sporty, beer-drinking, outdoorsy now-husband in my 20s and quickly realised that while those others might have been pale and interesting, he was secure, kind, welcoming, open-hearted, supportive, and SO much more fun to be around.

I was no longer being tortured (pun intended) by passions and neurotic feelings and who outdid who in any way, or panicking over how they behaved with my friends and family - with this new type I’d never gone for before and never thought I’d go for, turned out to be exactly what this arty, floaty, introspective type (me) needed.

Why obviously? Why can’t famous people just fall in love and get married without there being a conspiracy theory?

This! The way she is with Travis and her behaviour since being with him has been so much more confident and unapologetic. Just look at pictures of them together compared to pictures of her with Joe. He makes her feel confident and loved! I think she took a risk after hearing him talk about her on the podcast and it obviously paid off! On his political views my instinct tells me he wasn’t that into politics before her but she’s probably opened his eyes to a lot of the stuff she is passionate about and because he seems an all-round solid guy he is willing to listen and be open rather than come from a place of defence. I think Joe always seemed a bit over woke and pretentious in this area tbh.

I think having a rigid ‘type’ is fairly silly and a bit unusual. People certainly have characteristics that attract them, but there’s nothing to say that the specific characteristics that attracted her to Joe Alwyn aren’t the same ones that attracted her to Travis Kelce. The men she’s dated might all have a cracking sense of humour and share a love of nineteenth century poetry.

We do not know these people. We have no idea what their personalities are.

I agree with you Op.

I think it’s this. Their family backgrounds and upbringings are similar. She’s fooled around but ultimately ended up with someone who feels closer to home.

They’re both successful, motivated and driven. The big difference to me is that he is a very masculine man whereas the others were a bit more wafty.

I think that she's an American girl at heart, who found the idea of dating an English gent romantic, but in reality wouldn't want to have moved to the UK, nor him to The States. I think that Kelce is a really physically big man that just makes her feel safe. No one is going to mess with him and he will act as her bodyguard/protector. I think that it's also due to timing - her wanting to settle down and him being at the height of his career (in terms of achievement rather than longevity).

Well my type was exclusively men, indie men. Until I met my wife. Who isn’t indie in the slightest… and isn’t a man.

It doesn’t matter if you think you have a type as many people are sharing, one day you meet someone and types go out the window

I've cycled through footballers/rugby players for a few years, then dated a few a musicians, married and divorced a musician, and now my current partner is neither sporty or musical. He's a geeky PC gamer. If I was ever asked if I had a type I would probably say musicians though. Sometimes you can date people who aren't your usual type and it work out without it meaning your type has changed.

Very happy for her though 🥰 this is the kinda love she's sang about wanting her whole career.