Taylor Swift engagement - puzzled

[LouisaJG]

I’m in my 30s and so unreasonable to be posting/caring about this on every level. BUT. I didn’t see a post. So…

AIBU to be puzzled that the man Taylor Swift has finally decided to settle down with is so different to the type she has seemed to date pretty consistently through her 20s and 30s up to then? She seemed so keen on soft, arty, mainly British boys - and now she’s gone for the direct opposite. Is it because her previous long relationship with a soft, arty British boy (Joe Alwyn) didn’t go the distance and so she decided she really needed to change her type if she wanted marriage and kids? Is it a fairly cynical marketing reaction to the current political situation in the States (no idea if TK is actually a Republican but he looks like someone who could appeal to Republicans, very much unlike Joe Alwyn)? Is it just a return to her American, country roots? What gives? I’m her age and I just can’t imagine my tastes changing as dramatically as that.

We used to like the same type of man, and now I feel like I don’t know her any more (I know, I know, I know) 🤣

Taylor Swift isn't a Republican so I very much doubt that has anything to do with it. I think they're a good match, it's pretty typical for very attractive feminine women to end up with large sporty men. They look like they could be from some 90s/00s teen rom com which would have been the era Taylor Swift grew up in.

Have you watched the podcast? The way they talk about each other is so heart warming and he’s clearly not just some brainless jock, he’s funny and clever and supportive of her.

I’m a massive Matty fan (as my name would suggest to anyone who knows!) but even I am delighted for Taylor that she found this beautiful uncomplicated love with someone who is her biggest cheerleader.

I didn't have a type at all. Fancied and had relationships with all sorts of different guys but definitely fell for & married a different type to them all. It was like a biological need to be with someone who'd be a good dad and loyal husband. He's not a republican though!! 😂. I think Travis kelce is gorgeous and surely someone with such kind eyes couldn't be a Trump supporter?!

And re physical types, some of us just aren’t wired that way. The last guy I dated was 5’4 and about the same width. DP is 6’4 and a beanpole.

Sometimes its the person not the look or vibe, and while arty poets may have tickled her fancy before, someone who is so invested in HER art and poetry instead of setting up a rivalry will make her life so much more fun.

“I’m better at writing was just a way to get you biting, the truth is that our egos are absurd.” (MH)

I think getting engaged is a hint she wants marriage?
I agree he's not her usual type and she does seem to have a type. Which might be why this one has become so serious relatively quickly.
What's her dad like, women often marry versions of their fathers!

True. But, what's the point in being a Democrat if it isn't to broadcast the fact, it would be very out of character.

I’m going with YABU just because I don’t really think she had a type at all over the years?

I mean, what does Matty Healy have in common with toddler Kennedy?

What's the quote about madness being doing what you've always done but expecting the outcome to be different? She's dated similar types of guys, it's never gone the distance. So she's looked for someone different and it's worked.

Well look at how they all ended. Seems pretty sensible to try something different.

I know very little about either of them but get the impression she's met a decent man with own life and career who isn't intimidated by or jealous or her fame and wants the same things out of life.

Seems like a result to me.

Politically, she is a Democrat; he hasn't outright stated his politics, but his close family are Democrats, and his social media activity includes likes for Kamala, etc, so it is probably fairly safe to assume he is similar.

I think, maybe more importantly, he is unfazed and unthreatened by her fame and celebrity, as he has experience with a similarly motivated fan base in the sports world.

Something I have noticed sometimes (Nigella is the other one that springs to mind) is that very successful women often have partners who dislike the very thing that is their superpower. So, Saatchi was such a picky eater that Nigella couldn't cook for him, and Taylor's popularity was a thing that made Joe Alwyn uncomfortable. In both cases, these women who have built their fame (or some of it) based on particular aspects of themselves are left having to compromise that very thing to make their partners comfortable. It's an interesting power dynamic, I think, and not necessarily a very positive one.

Anyway, she seems to have found an umproblematic guy who makes her happy. He is well thought of by everyone who knows him and is visibly excited for and supportive of her success in all its aspects. Good luck to them both, I say.

I've seen this plenty.

The 'type' isn't working out so you try something else.

Thought this too. Presumably she's thought 'these soft arty boys don't work out for me, maybe I need to give someone different a try'..

They weren't her type. They were stopgaps until she met her type.

Maybe he’s just a genuinely good bloke who can cope with his future wife’s stardom and the others couldn’t. They’re engaged, let them be.

He is successful in his own right, he seems comfortable with her fame and they seem to come from a similar type of background. I say seem because no one really knows them. From the outside it would appear they are a good match.

I’d argue that Calvin Harris was more famous and possibly richer than TK was when they met. He might have been well known in US NFL circles but he wasn’t household name famous.

He’s obviously very physically different to the arty, muso brits she has been with before. But The biggest difference I can see is that he’s outwardly supportive and very publicly vocal about her, in the way the others weren’t. Maybe she likes that after all.

I’m way too old to care about this, but I love it.

From what little insight we really have into her relationships and her and Travis, it seems like Travis really shows up for her in a way previous partners didn’t, he’s not afraid of her success or want to hide them away from the world. He seems like an uncomplicated grown up who just thinks she’s great and loves her for her. No angst, no drama.

I’ve actually thought about this a lot. On the politics pretty sure Travis is a Democrat. I think he is so different to the guys shes dated before and that’s why it worked. She spent a long time with the english guys and then she met Travis and discovered who she is. She is outgoing, an over sharer and miss Americana. Travis embodies all of that. She’s embracing who she really is. Also he completly adores her and is so proud of her success. A lot of her exes couldn’t handle that

They both enjoy being in the public eye and are very good at self promotion. Seems to be working for them.

I said ‘if she wants’, not ‘she wants’. But given they’re engaged, I think it does seem pretty reasonable to assume they both see marriage as worth having.

Would that include the famously secretive Tom Hiddlestone romance?

I think Taylor Swift is as a brilliant PR construction as ever existed. That's not to say that she's a bad person privately - but she's an industry. Taylor Swift the performer is no less of a brand that Coke or Nike. What she's like in person we have no idea.

Bur maybe he is like that and we dont know? Or its like all her other relationships and he just likes to put a ring on it. Doesnt mean itll last.

I certainly learned from previous relationships that what I thought I wanted, was not in fact what I liked.

She posted that she was supporting Kamala during the election, so not sure where this, 'she's a Republican,' comes from?

Am sure Travis' politics are aligned to hers, but it's way way different for her to be vocal about her politics than someone who is effectively an employee of the Kansas City Chiefs, but don't think that football is one party or another.