Bed situation. Weekend away.

[Puffalicious]

I'm going away for the weekend for my sister's big birthday, Fri-Sun.

Background is that I really don't want to go - I'm not a fan of 'enforced fun', drinking all weekend & 'girly' pursuits (as they call it) - hot-tub, nail salon, games, themes etc- but I felt I needed to go or there would be raised brows & bad feeling. I already do not go to the annual weekend away with my sisters & female cousins due to these very reasons, & didn't attend niece's abroad hen (went to home hen)- I plainly cite that it's 'Not my thing, but hope you have a lovely time & send lots of photos'. I did go to the cousin's one last autumn as it was in the UK, but didn't really enjoy it & was thankful I could wild swim/ go walks to have a bit of chill time.

Anyway, back to this weekend. It's both my sisters & sister-in-law, & each have a daughter (my nieces- ranging in age 19-30), so 7 in total including me (I have 3 sons so none of them attending). I've just found out there's only 6 beds!!! No mention of this beforehand. WhatsApp chat has mentioned we need to toss a coin for the sofa!

I'm just not doing it. Although i love them all dearly, I already don't fancy going & don't want to sleep badly all ruddy weekend. We've all paid the same- not a little amount. DN (30) has a fractured foot, so she can't go on the sofa.

YABU - take your turn on the sofa, suck it up.

YANBU- message the chat in some way. If so, what do i write?

I’d be driving there in the Camper and staying in that.

That’s what I’d say. Make it clear by saying you’ll feel terrible chucking them all out of the living room at 10pm to get to bed, so it would make more sense for one of the party girls to have the sofa. Do this before they draw straws for the sofa as there’s a 6/7 chance it won’t be you anyway, so even if they disagree with you, they’ll be aware of your stance if you do get picked so you can laugh and say “oh no! Looks like early nights all round for you lot” etc

I hope so, but SILand youngest DN have remained quiet! She needs to get up early Sunday morning to drive home for a shift at her Summer job, which will no doubt be the excuse.o

Exactly what I was coming to say. Seems like the perfect solution, you get to go to bed when you fancy.

Oh, I like this! Remaining very upbeat! 👍

Only complication is if the blow-up fits in one of the rooms. Maybe I'll sleep in the ruddy hot-tub!

Did they maybe assume you would drop out therefore booked for 6? Does seem harsh if you have paid the same as everyone else.

Message the group something like ‘you know how boring I am, I’ll be in bed hours before the rest of you and don’t want to have to kick anyone out of the living room. Would anyone mind if I took one of the beds? I don’t care who I share with or how small the room is.’

DH is working away on an island this week, so dodgy contact. I think my first suggestion is the camper if it's free!

You clearly don’t want to go but don’t seem to want to do anything to change the situation either (cancel, book hotel etc)? I’m not sure why you’ve posted. YANBU to not enjoy the same activities as them but plenty of people do like girly trips away getting a bit tipsy.

No, it was the ideal location, lovely etc. I had no idea it only had 6 beds.

Ha! Classic MN response. I'm very aware that plenty people love these breaks & activities.

Why did I post? To get suggestions of what to message without offending anyone- I love them all, but I'm quite different to them. That okay with you?

The camper van solution sounds perfect. You can buggar off out the way as and when suits you.

I think the camper seems like an ideal solution. You get a bed but can also escape to it if you need a break from all the fun for an hour or two.

I suppose this is true. I maybe seem as antisocial, but less so than if I just squirrels away in a room.

Could you park the camper outside? Your own safe quiet and comfy spot?

IF I said I was going for a drive & a walk somewhere I think I'd get away with that. I SO hope DH isn't using it Sunday. It would be remiss to leave him without it since he'll be here with teen DSX 2 (youngest with significant additional needs) & he's been away working his backside off all week (14 hrs days).

Oh goodness OP this give me flashbacks. I am, always have been, the same as you. Small local thing fine, anything else cannot cope.

went to husband cousins 40th. In same circumstance as you. Was promised the small single room so I could work and escape. I had really important case the Monday. Friday night, by the time I arrived, which was about 5pm. Her friend was asleep hammered and had been sick.

I cooked the meal I had promised and left. It was just not me, would have wrecked the following week. I just could not do it.

Camper van seems like the ideal solution.
When you say 6 beds is it actually 6 beds or 3 double beds or a combination of doubles and singles?

I realise I've parroted a pp word for word in my first sentence 😄

I'd take the raised eyebrows and bad feeling any day and just not go.

If you are willing to pay the same as all the others, despite providing your own bed in your campervan, I think they should all be very grateful to you.

Its an invite, not a summons

‘Great news, everyone! Nobody needs to take the sofa. I can take the camper van and sleep in that so we get a bed each.’

They’ll all be relieved that nobody has to sleep on the sofa or a blow up bed. You get your own space when you need it, and you have to leave early on Sunday as your DH needs it.

Actually, on this occasion- no! You don't know my sisters.

It's 2 doubles and a twin. Double doesn't bother me.

I'm feeling you.