Plane seats - refused to swap

[Annoyed321]

please bear with me, I really need to vent but I need advice too.

Holiday with DH, 8 year old DD and 5 year old DS. Our seats were allocated away from each other. Not even on same aisle literally scattered on different parts of the plane. DH books and sorts checking in and I don’t usually get involved. He tried to apparently check in 24 hours before the flight but there was an error (he didn’t tell me), he was unable to check in and was advised online chat to see a member of staff at airport when we were flying, we get to check in on day of flight and lady says she can’t sit us together. I pleaded with her to at least let there be one of us sat with each child, no problem about all 4 of us sitting together.

She said to ask people when we get to the seat if anyone will swap with us. When we got there everyone refused, which I don’t really blame them as they checked in and chose their seats we didn’t or couldn’t.

I got very emotional as my 5 year old was crying about not sitting next to me DH as usual was unbothered and was just standing around looking unfazed. I’m really embarrassed about my reaction but he said it’s fine and I said it’s not fine “I’m not having my kids sat in between strangers”. It wasn’t as dramatic as I’m making out as it was over very quickly as the cabin crew we spoke to on boarding were able to allocate 2 seats together. Myself and my 5 year old took it and DH sat 2 rows In front of DD who was sat inbetween 2 men, DH was also sat between 2 guys so made no difference where I put her.

I was upset the entire flight and kept asking DH to keep an eye on DD, DH kept rolling his eyes and ignoring me. I felt like a bad mother leaving my child sat there with strangers. I feel embarrassed incase anyone videoed me at the start asking/pleading with people to please swap seats to allow me to sit next to my 2 kids. I only asked about 2 people and they avoided eye contact and ignored me, again I get it.

advice: DH is old fashioned (or should say a complete knob) he won’t share the booking details of flight with me as he’s worried I will mess up the booking, like I’m a stupid child! So I need advice please how can I make sure I am sat next to my kids on flight back home? I will need a booking reference I know which I will have to keep asking him for but the holiday was booked via Expedia and I think that’s what messed up when was trying to check in online 24 hours before. How can I check in if flights were booked with Expedia? I will call them if he doesn’t share booking ref but I doubt they will speak to me due to data protection. Any advice please?

Please be kind and don’t make me feel worse than I feel. Can anyone at least relate with me about how upset I was about DD sat alone? I am a survivor of childhood SA so my feelings might be out of place but I also read a news article literally a few days before flight if a 15 year old girl getting assaulted by a fellow passenger during a flight do these things do happen.

I really feel for you and your husband is a twaunt, you might not be able to get seated together as people usually book both flights at the same time. But this brings into perspective about the airline companies, I really don’t think children should be allowed to sit away from their family just so the airline can make more money. I find it morally wrong.

This is typical of a snowflake generation, always cry-arsing and playing the victim. Man-up and take control girl. Next time, book the flights & book the seats yourself

I know it isn't the fault of the other passengers that your husband messed up, but I can't imagine watching a mother become upset about not being sat with her kids on a plane and not offering to swap (unless I was sat with my kids of course). I also think it is despicable that air lines would separate children from their parents. My reaction would have been very similar to yours.
I think you'll need to try and call the airline and explain what happened and see what they can do.

Even if you'd chosen and paid for your seat months in advance? I've just booked and paid for a flight next August and paid for a particular seat. I won't be moving out of it if someone's upset. Their failure to plan (whoever is responsible) isn't my responsibility to address.

TELL that w⚓ of a husband that YOU will book seats for the return flight. Oh, and that, by the way, you'll be doing the seat bookings in future.

I don’t think you have anything to be embarrassed about nor do I think I would have handled that well, no one willing to help a mum sit next to her kids? Oh I would have caused a war 😠 between stupid ignorant passengers and husband they’d be begging to swap seats 🤬 I am soooo sorry OP, it’s horrible! We had a similar experience, though we pre paid all of our seats together when making original booking 6 months before, for all 6 of us to sit together, our 4 kids were 15,13,8 and 3 at the time, we booked through love holidays so we got landed with Ryanair and I thought ohh nope I’m gonna be on the ball with them so they can’t mess us about, We travelled hours to airport, had breakfast then several hours waiting in lounge, flight got delayed twice and moved gates twice, but we eventually got there, stood in Que right up until we got to the desk to show passports and walk on to plane, the boarding passes on my phone were then coming up errors, I was confused as hell, by then everyone’s on the plane but us 6 and I am on the verge of panicking, they said even though I checked us in 1 full WEEK before the departing day, we were in the last 20% of passengers to do so and lost our seats , even though they were picked and paid 6 months before!! Apparently all airlines do this and it’s common knowledge but yet I couldn’t see anything online or in t&cs - They then told me that we might not even get on the damn plane!!! Urgh I was so angry I cried!! I told them If we didn’t get on that plane I would sue their asses, turns out they had 2 empty seats at randoms spots and 4 that were for staff, one of the staff being a police airline officer, who kindly offered us the seats so we could sit with the 2 younger ones and the older 2 went to random seats, but even at age of 15 & 13 I was worried and it was a 4 hour flight so I just kept getting up to check in on them whilst looking to see who I could ask to move about for me to get them closer to myself or DH, we managed to get a few lovely people who were happy to help a family out cause that’s what kind considerate people do!! But since then I have booked 2 other holidays and made sure to avoid Ryanair and book and pay for seats and had to issues!
honestly I would speak you your DH and demand he give you the details or you won’t be going anywhere with him again, put your foot down - your a goddam woman and this is for your kids - don’t you dare let anyone make you feel like you were over reacting it’s an awful feeling and I do not wish to be in that situation again, take control !! I’d be giving that man of yours the ultimatum of treating you like an equal or ending your relationship cause your worth more

I think you have a point, they should, by law, be forced to seat children with parents but that is not the issue in this case in point. They knew the system and did not use it. End of.

‘End of’ 😂😂😂

I think when you choose Ryanair, you know it is not going to be a doozy but you pay your money and make your choice. You can check in earlier than you did, you should have done so. I guess you won't make that mistake again but advocating anger can get you taken off the flight and even arrested, don't suggest it to others.

If you book with a third party provider like Love Holidays it's more difficult to sort things out if they don't go to plan.

@Mjayy101 Did it ever cross your mind that those people who swapped seats may not have paid for their seats?

Of course they were threatened by you saying you were going to sue a company that makes €1.6 billion profit a year and can afford the best lawyers money can buy 🙄

You've got a dh issue. You have to pay to sit next to each other. I'd have put your two children together as you were lucky to get two seats together as your husband was a cheap skate. Why you allowing your dh to dictate to you this much. He sounds awful. Does he have any good points. Your issue is your husband not the seats.

I have used several airlines in past and checked in as late as travelling in to the airport and never been an issue 🤷🏻‍♀️ I’m not encoring anger or aggression, but I am encouraging the OP stand stand her ground and to not apologise or feel like she’s been dramatic cause there are very inconsiderate people out there!