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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover

664 replies

Malahala · 22/08/2025 11:06

We moved into our house almost a year ago. It hadn’t been updated in 40 years, but it’s in a great area, between two outstanding schools, and we managed to get it for £200k less than asking as the seller needed a quick sale. It’s a 4-bed with 2 bathrooms, 2 receptions, a separate kitchen and a utility room. It’s a fantastic investment and I still feel lucky to own it.

The reality is we maxed ourselves out buying it, so there’s no money left for big renovations or an extension. My DH doesn’t like the house — he would have preferred a “done” house — but we couldn’t afford that in this area and didn’t want to move elsewhere. His attitude is that everything should be done by professionals, but we can’t afford that either.

So over the past year I’ve been doing most of the work myself: stripping wallpaper, painting, redecorating etc. Recently I tackled the 40-year-old kitchen. We can’t afford new units, so I added panelling to the cupboard doors and painted them, replaced the cabinet handles, removed the lino as it was damaged, stripped wallpaper, painted the walls and the orange tiles, covered the worst tiles with panelling, and wrapped the worktops in vinyl. It’s not perfect — some of the cupboards don’t hang completely straight and need adjusting — but the difference is huge. Instead of a 40-year-old kitchen, it now looks more like a 10-year-old one.

The problem is DH doesn’t appreciate it. He still says the kitchen looks “old” and can’t see the point of me spending a few hundred pounds making it nicer. He hasn’t lifted a finger to help because he doesn’t do DIY, won’t ask FIL (apparently he will be critical because the panelling on the cabinets isn’t quite right) or his builder friend (friend will likely be “too busy”), so it’s all been left to me. His view is we need a new kitchen/extension, but realistically that’s not happening for at least 5 years. I’d rather make it more liveable now.

What’s making me doubt myself is other people’s reactions. A wealthy friend came round and just said, “so much change!” but not that it looked nice. MIL commented on how hard I’d worked rather than how good it looked. My mum loved it and thought a new tap, sink and dishwasher would make a big difference (and she went straight out and bought all of these for me) but she’s also my mum so not that objective. Now I’m worrying I’ve just “polished a turd” and made the kitchen worse, whereas I genuinely feel it’s a big improvement.

Here are the before and (nearly) after photos. They may take a while to load. Be brutally honest — have I done a decent job for a DIY upgrade, or does it look as bad as DH, friend and MIL seem to think? I’m worried I’m embarrassing myself by being so pleased with my efforts.

YABU - I agree with your DH, friend and MIL
YANBU - It looks nice!

To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
To feel deflated about DIY kitchen makeover
OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
bilbodog · 22/08/2025 11:08

I think youve doneca great job OP!

Junibug · 22/08/2025 11:08

I think you’ve done a fantastic job! It looks so much better. Shame on your DH for not appreciating all your hard work.

GreenSedan · 22/08/2025 11:09

Ah. It definitely looks better. Much fresher. Well done. Ignore them.

PornOfCopia · 22/08/2025 11:10

In all honesty I didn't read the post (too long 😂) but from the before and after pictures it looks great!

Pineapplesunshine · 22/08/2025 11:10

It looks great! I think you've done a really good job. It’s the same kitchen and there’s nothing you can do about that, but it looks miles better. Maybe a blind and / or some plants around the window to add a bit of interest? I think you’ve done a brilliant job though - and your husband should be grateful to have a wife who has done it all without any input from him. Well done!

wominzy · 22/08/2025 11:10

You did that all yourself? OMG well done you! I couldn't hammer in a nail without the wall falling down. You should be very proud of yourself, the cabinets and doors are great.

Your DH is sulking because he didn't get the "already done" house and he's jealous of your achievement I think. Leave him be and ignore him. Such childish behaviour needs the naughty step IMO.

TheFlis · 22/08/2025 11:10

It looks miles better!! You have done a fantastic job.

AyeDeadOn · 22/08/2025 11:10

Omg that's an amazing improvement! Well done. Your husband is a tit and doesnt deserve you.

Jewelanemone · 22/08/2025 11:10

It looks lovely now, you should be extremely pleased and proud of yourself ❤️

CornedBeef451 · 22/08/2025 11:11

I think it looks lovely, you’ve done a good job!

Locutus2000 · 22/08/2025 11:11

Looks awesome, I love a bit of upcycling and you have saved the environment from the debris of a still decent kitchen, bravo.

Bollocks to hubby.

Edit: You have inspired me now, damn it.

R0ckandHardPlace · 22/08/2025 11:11

It looks so much better! You’ve done a great job.

I do think that the quarry tiles let it down though, and I’d put a blind up on the window to soften it a bit.

TheNinthLockUnlocked · 22/08/2025 11:11

You have done a fantastic job!! Well done and be proud!

Jumpthewaves · 22/08/2025 11:11

Let him be miserable if he wants to, you can be very happy with the freshen up you've given it.

ThePinkPoster · 22/08/2025 11:12

I preferred the floor in the before pic but otherwise you’ve some a great job.

Bluevelvetsofa · 22/08/2025 11:12

Of course it looks better and you’ll feel happier using it. It also gives you more time to save for the makeover you want, rather than being fed up every day with the original.

gruebleen · 22/08/2025 11:13

It looks great!

Hanging the doors straight will make it look even better. It's not that hard to do once you get the hang of it.

AyeDeadOn · 22/08/2025 11:13

I would consider looking for an off cut of lino flooring. Doesn't have to cost much but could make a difference.

ThePinkPoster · 22/08/2025 11:14

I’d also pay someone to straighten up the doors - it probably wouldn’t take long/cost much but I bet it would make a huge difference to the look.

Aimtodobetter · 22/08/2025 11:14

Wow - you’ve done a really great job of it! I was not expecting based on your post for it to be such an obviously good transformation.

Notarsed · 22/08/2025 11:15

I'm very impressed! Please don't doubt yourself, you've done a fantastic job and should be very proud of yourself 👏

EarlofShrewsbury · 22/08/2025 11:15

It looks amazing, just needs new lino.

Bobbybobbins · 22/08/2025 11:15

Well done OP

snobcat · 22/08/2025 11:15

I think it looks great!

gamerchick · 22/08/2025 11:16

Eh? It looks mint OP. Do you want to come and do mine? Grin

The problem here is your husband and his whining.

Sit him down, tell him his comments are getting you down and he either needs to step up and help or shut the fuck up. Tell him to come up with a financially working plan to get stuff up to scratch or to shut the fuck up about it.

You're going to need to be really harsh with him I think.