To be shocked women still try to stop aging?

[jillyiam]

With alllll the progress we've made within the feminism movement, why is trying to look younger (neck aging, face-lifts, longer hair is 'youthful') still a thing.

Every being is aging right, why do women still carry the shame of it? Being told you look even three years younger is actually intended and received as a compliment.

If we all collectively shun this shit, the industry that forces us to buy its crap, we'll be so much better off. Mentally, financially everything really.

Age isn't a gift given to everyone! I'll be thrilled if I reach my grandfather's age, however I look.

Yeah I keep telling that to myself. Then I see a wonderful facelift on some social media app and have intense feelings of WANTING A FACE LIFT. I know in my head its internalised bullshit and essentially the system forces us to dance to this tune.

When will we all look back at paying money to inject literal toxin into our faces to stop us looking our age and be horrified.

And yessss, I'm sure there are a bunch of special snowflakes here who always resisted. Gold star for you. Yet, there is a whole industry built on this so you're just outliers (but good job!!!!!!)

You jumped the shark a bit early there with your women who don't have botox or facelifts or long hair are special snowflakes schtick.

Seriously though, I do hear what you are saying, patriarchy keeps us busy bothering with our appearance so that we don't have time to mobilise.

I'm sure there are a bunch of special snowflakes here who always resisted. Gold star for you. Yet, there is a whole industry built on this so you're just outliers (but good job!!!!!!)

What?

Of course plenty of people who have resisted treatments, always! Why the snide comment?

As for it being a reflection on feminism, nonsense. Women are entitled to choose what to do with their own bodies.

Is it true that women face unrealistic expectations around beauty and appearance? Sadly yes. But you are engaging in a lot of hyperbole.

I don’t think resisting decline, however inevitable, means you’re some kind of vain and vapid woman without feminist ideals and overly influenced by industry.

Being youthful in appearance is also about being fit and being healthy. Your external appearance is often a mirror of your internal well-being. Yes, there are people he take it to extremes. But plenty don’t. The vast majority of British women are overweight which puts them at risk of heart disease, cancer, dementia, and God knows what else.

I don’t class myself as a ‘special snowflake’ in any way. I’m a very ordinary woman in my 40s. I have never had any Botox/fillers/facelifts, and I never intend to. I don’t think I’m an outlier, I don’t think most people can afford to have those treatments.
I agree entirely that there is no shame in getting older.

I'm not ashamed of aging I just prefer looking younger.
Nature encourages humans to mate with those in their prime.
Therefore aging will still be fought against regardless of the beauty industry.
Cleopatra bathed in asses milk, can't blame L'Oréal.

Ageism is a thing. That's why people, especially women, try to look younger. Especially relevant in these days when experience counts for very little and we live in a world of style over content. Being and looking older means you are more likely to be managed out of your job so that they can employ youngsters with no experience at half the wages, more likely not to find a job, or at least find it harder if you are 40+, let alone 60+.
Age and wisdom are not respected any more. Looking younger gives you financial and societal advantages. It's not a happy thought , I wish it wasn't like that.

You’re shocked that women are trying to look their best, it’s been that way since time began, nothing is ever going to change

I’m trying to hold back the clock (a bit) but I’m doing it for myself not for anybody else,

Surgery and tweakments only work in the short term. Long term, they leave the individual looking either weird or just not like themselves.

I'm not necessarily averse to them for others although would never want them myself. I can't see the point of poking, prodding and messing around with the outside of my body when the inside is ageing at the usual rate.

I haven't got the energy of a 30 year old so why would I want to look like one? I know we live in a youth obsessed, sexist culture, but as individuals, as we age, surely we develop our own perspectives on these issues? I thought one of the positives of ageing was gaining wisdom.

And yessss, I'm sure there are a bunch of special snowflakes here who always resisted. Gold star for you. Yet, there is a whole industry built on this so you're just outliers (but good job!!!!!!)

Shame, it could've been a good discussion but you let yourself down with this childish nonsense.

Yeah i dont get it.

I don't do any of it. I've got a few greys, natural eyebrows & lips, fuck all makeup, and no botox/fillers and so help me god i swear i don't look worse than the people spending hundreds every month on it all.

Different yes but not really older even.

DH doesn't seem to mind

I agree with you.

Unfortunately it's making a lot of people very rich indeed. Very rich.

Sadly people are falling for the propaganda.

You've only got to look at Katie price, no matter how many face lifts and procedures she has, you can still tell her age, and her face eventually sags again after some months. It's not permanent.

It's not just surgery though. It's creams, potions, lotions, make up "essentials", beauty treatments. I'm afraid it's a mugs game.

The crazy thing is - you CAN help your skin etc look its best
....
It's cheap as chips.

Shade in the middle of the day

Drink loads of water

Wash with a bar of soap

Eat healthily

Maybe an inexpensive moisturiser if you get dry skin.

I’m a very ordinary woman in my 40s. I have never had any Botox/fillers/facelifts, and I never intend to. I don’t think I’m an outlier

To be honest most women i know don't bother - but the 30 or 40% who do are also much more visibly posting on social media etc so are very overrepresented

My mum is 72 and has never done any of it and looks bloody brilliant, smile lines and all. She looks a damn site better thah my poor colleague who needs to stop filling her lips like a grouper fish.

"Seriously though, I do hear what you are saying, patriarchy keeps us busy bothering with our appearance so that we don't have time to mobilise."

A serious question - do you really believe this? Em Clarkson, who I think is very often spot on, made a great post the other day about, after all the body positivity, no fat shaming etc stuff, it turns out all anyone really wants is to be thin (weight loss injections, fitness influencers etc) and "the patriarchy" is behind it all.

It's not really any different in principal to women dressing in a way to feel they look good or doing their hair and makeup in a style which makes them feel good.
Men do it too, get hair transplants in extreme cases, or get nice haircuts, buy clothes they feel good in, work out to look more toned etc.
There's nothing wrong with having pride in appearance. Also nothing wrong with not feeling the need to, its just a personal choice.

Women are not a homogeneous, mindless herd. Why should we collectively shun anything? This is just as ridiculous as continually badgering other women to 'embrace' grey hair. Everyone should be free to live their life and age the way they choose - free from toxic judgement.

It's not really any different in principal to women dressing in a way to feel they look good or doing their hair and makeup in a style which makes them feel good.
Men do it too, get hair transplants in extreme cases, or get nice haircuts, buy clothes they feel good in, work out to look more toned etc.
There's nothing wrong with having pride in appearance. Also nothing wrong with not feeling the need to, its just a personal choice.

There's nothing wrong with having pride in appearance. Also nothing wrong with not feeling the need to, its just a personal choice

This is an attitude I’ve seen before on here..: that if you’re not having beauty treatments/cosmetic enhancements etc that you don’t have ‘pride in your appearance’. I absolutely have pride in my appearance. I’m clean, healthy and neat. I drink lots of water, eat well and always wear factor 50. I do a lot of exercise and am fit and toned. Why would not having fillers/Botox etc mean I don’t have pride in my appearance? I think I look better than a lot of people I know who do have those things done 🤷🏻‍♀️

I absolutely have pride in my appearance. I’m clean, healthy and neat. I drink lots of water, eat well and always wear factor 50. I do a lot of exercise and am fit and toned. Why would not having fillers/Botox etc mean I don’t have pride in my appearance? I think I look better than a lot of people I know who do have those things done 🤷🏻‍♀️

I bet you look brill.

Men do it too, get hair transplants in extreme cases, or get nice haircuts, buy clothes they feel good in, work out to look more toned

I don't know a single man who's had a hair transplant. My male friends (40s) are by and large abandoning whats left of their hair and shaving their heads. I note the "clothes they feel good in" seems to mean trackies and a teeshirt often than not

Not really. Trying to prevent aging is a tale as old as time.

Dermatologists have been shouting from the rooftops about staying out of the sun, wearing sunscreen whenever leaving the house and using retinol/tretinoin to slow down the aging process. I do all of these things (and have done for a few years) and I’m rather happy with how my skin looks.

I doubt I’d ever have Botox or a face lift, but I wouldn’t judge anyone who chooses to have those procedures.

I’m 51 and one of the worst things is when I was online dating and the guys would say “you look good for your age “ …
like I should be grateful “for my age “
instant swerve but I agree with you there is so much pressure to look younger than we are

The best way to avoid ageing is keeping out of the sun. I know this isn't news!

I developed chloasma in my mid 20s which gave me splodges of dark pigmentation on my face. So I stopped going out in the sun and wore factor 50 every day.

I'm now 58 and you can really tell. I saw a laser therapist last week and she was astonished how unwrinkled I am.

Sadly I was seeing her about my beard. Can't win 'em all!