About Gender neutral loo

[paulhollywoodshairgel]

I was in a museum today and my daughter (15) left me to go to the loo. She then waved me over.. she said to me.. I’d rather not use the gender neutral loo. I said that’s fine and sent her down a level to the ladies. A woman the approached me and preceded to tell me off for not encouraging my daughter to use the GN loo. How she has a trans child and how are they ever going to feel accepted with people like me around. I’m ND and I always second guess myself 10000 times a day. I wasn’t in the wrong was I?? I just said ok go and use the other separate loo. Surely my child can pee wherever she feels comfortable??!! I hate conflict so I just said ok and walked off!

Imagine thinking you are entitled to tell someone to prioritise your child above their own.

edit: coherence

It isn’t really as it’s such an obvious one to answer on many levels
People have done much better clearly wind up threads

I knew of a boy who went into a men’s loo, he was brutally attacked. This is going back many years ago. I’d rather be safe than sorry.

Why is what your kids are comfortable with the standard that all kids should be judged against? How arrogant.

It was none of her business, how dare she think she had any right to comment on where your daughter chooses to perform an intimate act, which she is well within her rights to do. What a loon. Plus lots of mixed sex toilets are grim.

I don’t think anyone likes being told where they can pee

It’s more that lots of people object to being told they must pee in facilities used by members of the opposite sex. Like the child in the OP.

We don’t know if the other mother had a biological male or female child.

I think she'd have got a fairly robust: 'Your kid has an available toilet which meets his needs. My daughter's going to use the one that meets hers, which is single sex. She's not on this planet to perform her ablutions for his benefit.'

I'm usually fairly reticent about getting into public slanging matches with the genderwoos, but this would have brought out my mama bear for sure.

Although either of my dds would have told her where to get off before I had time to draw breath, tbh. They're 19 & 17 & very much 'oh that weird pronoun bullshit half of year 8 was doing back in the day? God, are people still doing that?!'

This. My god, she’d have a learned a lesson about unsolicited comments if she’d tried that with me….

Females exist merely as props for males’ egos and fantasies and vulnerabilities, chapter 6045.
Boundaries are selfish.
Choices are selfish.
Saying no is selfish.
Preferences are selfish.
Privacy is selfish.
Throughout history, a minority of women have smugly enabled men’s exploitation of other females.
This is just a small example.

No we don’t, and the OP’s daughter wasn’t objecting to using the same loo as any particular person. The issue she had was that the toilet was mixed sex.

Why does she think her child’s comfort is more important than yours?

She’s absolutely batshit. Her poor kid.

dont give her another thought

The fact she decided to put her 2 cents worth in when she saw that OPs daughter didn't want to share with males makes it kind of obvious

You can do what you think suits YOUR child best. You CANNOT lecture another parent on this issue.

@LittleMG what exactly is the boundary for you when it comes to this topic.

Would you gently encourage your daughter to get changed in a school open plan female changing room with their trans identified male classmate? They’re only getting changed for PE after all.

Would you gently encourage your daughter to share a room on a school residential with their trans identified male classmate? They identify as a girl after all.

Would you gently encourage your Nana to share a room on a gynaecology ward with a trans identified male patient.

Would you gently encourage your friend who’s been sexually assaulted by a man to open up about her experience in a women only rape trauma group in front of a Trans identified male. He wasn’t the man who assaulted her after all and he identifies as a woman so why shouldn’t she be expected to ignore her pain to validate him?

Where is the line for you, what level of boundary crossing and breaches of single sex facilities should women and girls tolerate before it’s ok to say no?

Agree but lets
Just say it how it is
Get changed
Go to the toilet
Share bedrooms
with random men

How they ‘identify’ does not change their sex

Hermoine you’re clearly more intelligent than Emma 😄

I’m really not trying to wind people up! I just always second guess myself. I didn’t make a big deal.. she asked to go to the ladies loo and I just said ok. She’s a 15 yo girl who is very body conscious and didn’t feel comfortable doing her private functions in a GN loo. There were 3 blokes in there as well it was a busy day. I feel a lot better now thanks all. This woman absolutely had no right to say anything to me and if it happens again I’ll say so!

Women are more likely to be assaulted in unisex toilets.

No one should be encouraging young girls into a situation where they are more at risk of sexual assault.

It's very concerning that lady Kenya thinks a woman trying to coerce other women and their daughters into risky situations is a 'good' use of time.

https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/sexual-assault-unisex-changing-rooms-sunday-times-women-risk-a8519086.html

This woman absolutely had no right to say anything to me and if it happens again I’ll say so!

absolutely, you did nothing wrong at all…or your daughter!!!

You were not in the wrong. Well done for supporting your daughter.

the woman was being ridiculous. She needs to endure her trans child doesn’t depend on external validation

That’s the damage this ideology does to society. The mom clearly knows that without social affirmation all the lies she’s told her son won’t carry water. She needs the public’s participation to continue the delusion.

sadly, I have 2 friends like this - they are so smart and interesting but when defending their sons, they are absolutely unhinged. They believe everyone who isn’t 100 percent on board is being difficult and mean. It’s a major strain on our friendship