Page 6 | About Gender neutral loo

paulhollywoodshairgel · 2025-08-14T17:59:39+00:00

I was in a museum today and my daughter (15) left me to go to the loo. She then waved me over.. she said to me.. I’d rather not use the gender neutral loo. I said that’s fine and sent her down a level to the ladies. A woman the approached me and preceded to tell me off for not encouraging my daughter to use the GN loo. How she has a trans child and how are they ever going to feel accepted with people like me around. I’m ND and I always second guess myself 10000 times a day. I wasn’t in the wrong was I?? I just said ok go and use the other separate loo. Surely my child can pee wherever she feels comfortable??!! I hate conflict so I just said ok and walked off!

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 08:25

ThatBlackCat · 15/08/2025 08:07

Firstly, this clearly is not a place with only one toilet, so that point is irrelevant. And it's not about the cubicles. It's about the room and facility itself. No woman likes 'gender neutral loos'. No woman wants them.If you were a rape survivor or sexual trauma victim you'd understand it. Not that women and girls should have to justify our hard won rights to sex-based spaces. Feminists fought so hard for single sex spaces for safety, privacy and dignity, and I wish people would stop taking a shit on their headstones and acting as if everything these foremother feminists did was for nothing. All gender neutral should be banned.

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Sexual abuse survivor here, I don’t have an issue with gender neutral toilets.

I don’t think everyone should feel comfortable with them because I do, but equally you can’t apply the broad sweeping “no woman likes them” in the other direction

Kucinghitam · 15/08/2025 08:26

ThatBlackCat · 15/08/2025 08:19

Yep, in reality, NO female wants to use a loo with men around. It's reality.

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The Righteous BeKind ladies on this thread would have you believe that everybody is practically falling over themselves to validatingly and cool-girly use the mixed sex toilets. No doubt on other threads, the same Righteous BeKind ladies would have you believe that they're falling over themselves to validatingly and cool-girly use the women's toilets where women = anybody who says they have lady-feelz.

ThatBlackCat · 15/08/2025 08:29

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 07:36

All the people saying it’s outrageous or disgusting to share loos, genuinely what do you do in places where only one loo exists? Until the relatively recent gender neutral publication of toilets became ‘a thing’, I’d often go to cafes, shops, hairdressers etc with only one loo and never questioned it being an issue.

Um, it's quite obvious it's different when there is only one toilet.

This really should not need to be explained to you.

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 08:33

ThatBlackCat · 15/08/2025 08:29

Um, it's quite obvious it's different when there is only one toilet.

This really should not need to be explained to you.

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Well maybe I’m stupid then.

when people’s objection is ‘men can put cameras in mixed sex loos’ and ‘men leave them dirty’…I can’t fathom how that changes whether there is one loo or seven. But if you can educate the stupid out of me, please go ahead.

whatcanthematterbe81 · 15/08/2025 09:05

Sure

SirBasil · 15/08/2025 10:03

Kucinghitam · 15/08/2025 08:26

The Righteous BeKind ladies on this thread would have you believe that everybody is practically falling over themselves to validatingly and cool-girly use the mixed sex toilets. No doubt on other threads, the same Righteous BeKind ladies would have you believe that they're falling over themselves to validatingly and cool-girly use the women's toilets where women = anybody who says they have lady-feelz.

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it is bloody simple though. If you are ok with a mixed sex loo i think you should be obliged to use it. It cuts down the queue for the actual ladies.

Stop making a fuss, just do it.

SirBasil · 15/08/2025 10:05

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 08:33

Well maybe I’m stupid then.

when people’s objection is ‘men can put cameras in mixed sex loos’ and ‘men leave them dirty’…I can’t fathom how that changes whether there is one loo or seven. But if you can educate the stupid out of me, please go ahead.

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there is still a danger that a unisex single occupancy toilet could be left in a disgusting state by anyone, and that anyone could put a camera in it.

HTH

Added to which, i know several people who won't come with me to my favourite cafe because there is only one, accessible, single occupancy toilet. It is... not lovely. But they simply won't use it.

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 10:06

Kucinghitam · 15/08/2025 08:26

The Righteous BeKind ladies on this thread would have you believe that everybody is practically falling over themselves to validatingly and cool-girly use the mixed sex toilets. No doubt on other threads, the same Righteous BeKind ladies would have you believe that they're falling over themselves to validatingly and cool-girly use the women's toilets where women = anybody who says they have lady-feelz.

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I'm not falling over myself to use a mixed sex loo. I just don't care if the loo is mixed sex. I don't think that's particularly radical, everyone I know in real life feels the same. It's a non issue amongst me and my friends/children/family.

That doesn't mean other people can't feel differently - but saying "no one is OK with it" is as ridiculous as saying "everyone should be ok with it"

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 10:07

SirBasil · 15/08/2025 10:05

there is still a danger that a unisex single occupancy toilet could be left in a disgusting state by anyone, and that anyone could put a camera in it.

HTH

Added to which, i know several people who won't come with me to my favourite cafe because there is only one, accessible, single occupancy toilet. It is... not lovely. But they simply won't use it.

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Well yes, that's the point I was making. There is still that danger. So having one mixed sex loo, or several in a row, has no impact on that happening. The poster I was replying to said there wouldn't be any worries if it was only one loo. Which I don't understand if those are your reasons for not wanting to use mixed sex loos.

sanluca · 15/08/2025 10:08

Kuretake · 15/08/2025 07:25

I'd guess mixed sex on the basis there are different bacteria that are more likely to be on each sex? So you get the full set. Is just a guess though!

We have mixed sex loos at work and they're generally about as clean as the single sex ones we had in our previous office but they're cleaned throughout the day. I would rather they were single sex but apparently if they were we'd need extra ones - you can have fewer if everyone can use them.

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Nope, the order was as stated. Mens being twice as bad as mixed sex and mixed sex about 1.33 as bad as the womens.

BIossomtoes · 15/08/2025 10:09

KnickerlessParsons · 14/08/2025 19:18

Gender neutral mixed sex toilets are always in a disgusting state. Wee everywhere and the seat left up.

Not the ones I’ve used.

SirBasil · 15/08/2025 10:09

and you can choose not to use it.

And when more are available, you can choose the single sex. It is not a bloody "gotcha" you know.

Some people (me included) don't like totally enclosed toilet cubicles, unless they have been thoroughly cleaned immediately before they go in. They reek. I have a very sensitive nose though, and other people don't mind. Go them.

But. I will not use a mixed sex toilet, especially if there is a performative AGP there getting his kicks.

ETA: that was a reply to @OneCoralCat

In summary: if there is a choice, people are perfectly entitled to make their choice for whatever reason they like and the parents of trans people can keep their beaks out.

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 10:12

SirBasil · 15/08/2025 10:09

and you can choose not to use it.

And when more are available, you can choose the single sex. It is not a bloody "gotcha" you know.

Some people (me included) don't like totally enclosed toilet cubicles, unless they have been thoroughly cleaned immediately before they go in. They reek. I have a very sensitive nose though, and other people don't mind. Go them.

But. I will not use a mixed sex toilet, especially if there is a performative AGP there getting his kicks.

ETA: that was a reply to @OneCoralCat

In summary: if there is a choice, people are perfectly entitled to make their choice for whatever reason they like and the parents of trans people can keep their beaks out.

Edited

Absolutely, I've never said they can't make their choice.

What I object to is women on this thread saying "no woman wants to use them", when that evidently isn't the case.

EchoedSilence · 15/08/2025 10:14

I quite happily use them. I'm obviously the wrong sort of MN woman.

LoudlyProudlyHorrid · 15/08/2025 10:14

Why should you waste energy convincing your daughter to use a mixed sex loo, in order to please some imaginary person who wants to be the opposite of their sex, when they can just nip to the women's loo on the next floor?!

LoudlyProudlyHorrid · 15/08/2025 10:16

EchoedSilence · 15/08/2025 10:14

I quite happily use them. I'm obviously the wrong sort of MN woman.

Have you ever been in one where you've had to walk past the next cubicle that has a man in who didn't close the door?
Have you ever had a drunken man come in and block the exit, demanding to know what you're doing in the men's toilets?

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 10:21

LoudlyProudlyHorrid · 15/08/2025 10:16

Have you ever been in one where you've had to walk past the next cubicle that has a man in who didn't close the door?
Have you ever had a drunken man come in and block the exit, demanding to know what you're doing in the men's toilets?

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Yes to the first, no to the second.

I'm not often in places that drunken men frequent. And this post is about a museum, so seems an unlikely outcome there too.

Men are a huge issue in society, you won't hear argument from me in that regard. I don't think an example of a drunken man blocking a toilet door because he lacks the brain capacity to understand he's in a mixed sex loo is going to be particularly common.

NeverOneBiscuit · 15/08/2025 10:22

I’m generally very polite but I think I would have told her to get stuffed & mind her own business.

My friend with a trans child has become the most entitled, intolerant person I’ve ever met. They’re selling their child a lie & everyone else has to be roped in to help validate it.

ChaToilLeam · 15/08/2025 10:25

Not your job to make your daughter validate her child's delusion. But there is no reasoning with such people.

TheKeatingFive · 15/08/2025 10:25

NeverOneBiscuit · 15/08/2025 10:22

I’m generally very polite but I think I would have told her to get stuffed & mind her own business.

My friend with a trans child has become the most entitled, intolerant person I’ve ever met. They’re selling their child a lie & everyone else has to be roped in to help validate it.

Well this is the problem isnt it?

They're writing their kids cheques that they expect everyone else to cash.

Thelnebriati · 15/08/2025 10:28

EchoedSilence · 15/08/2025 10:14

I quite happily use them. I'm obviously the wrong sort of MN woman.

You've missed the point. No one is telling you or your daughter which toilet to use. You have a choice, allow the rest of us the same courtesy.

BundleBoogie · 15/08/2025 10:30

Missanimosity · 14/08/2025 22:55

Oh my God, where the hell did you find a camera in a loo? And what do you mean they wee all over the floor??? They don't! You can say what you want to say, but when you use such silly unfounded arguments, it defeats your point.

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So you’ve missed the entire porn genre that is unconsenting women bring filmed in the toilet (just google for news articles)? And I have been in mixed sex toilers in quite a nice restaurants which have indeed had men peeing on the floor. The smell is quite pronounced.

It is your denials that are unfounded.

BundleBoogie · 15/08/2025 10:39

Missanimosity · 15/08/2025 01:48

Men wee all over the floor? Right! Cameras are in all toilets has norhing to do with gender neutral. I am mot rude just because i challenge a post you made doesen't make me rude. But, sure, right, it is as you say, if you think the way of not being rude is to ageee with you. Ok.
Sorry for typos fat fingers

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Can you understand that if you make it easier for a man to access a space where women will use the toilet, there are men that will exploit that opportunity?

Men obviously have every right to be in a mixed sex toilet space so installing a tiny camera is much easier than if he had to sneak into the ladies. Obviously he could put on a dress and no one dare challenge him but that’s another story.

Your denial of the facts is ill informed.

EchoedSilence · 15/08/2025 10:40

Thelnebriati · 15/08/2025 10:28

You've missed the point. No one is telling you or your daughter which toilet to use. You have a choice, allow the rest of us the same courtesy.

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I haven't missed a PP point that NO WOMEN want mixed sex toilets. She doesn't get to speak for me. I should have quoted her rant.

OneCoralCat · 15/08/2025 10:41

BundleBoogie · 15/08/2025 10:39

Can you understand that if you make it easier for a man to access a space where women will use the toilet, there are men that will exploit that opportunity?

Men obviously have every right to be in a mixed sex toilet space so installing a tiny camera is much easier than if he had to sneak into the ladies. Obviously he could put on a dress and no one dare challenge him but that’s another story.

Your denial of the facts is ill informed.

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Yes and the point I made is that this could happen in a quaint cafe with one loo, or a huge arena like the NEC with mixed sex loos available. And another poster told me it was stupid to think the two were comparable. Still waiting for an answer on how that's the case!