Comment to air hostess

[Backfromthebrink]

Just arrived on holiday and I need the wise opinions of the Mumsnet community to help me decide if I’m being super unreasonable or if I’m right to feel pissed off.

On the plane off on holiday with my DH and DD9. Half way into the journey and the air hostess (think blonde, slim, attractive) comes down the aisle selling scratch cards, Prize being another holiday. She gets to our row and DH asks for x5 tickets and cheekily says “if I win, do you come too?” to the lady selling. I’m mortified and give her an apologetic look. She gives me a somewhat sympathetic look and I’m just feeling like the biggest dickhead.

I can’t bring myself to speak to my DH out of disgust and he laughs it off and makes me feel like I’m creating a drama for no reason. Feel so upset that he would humiliate me in front of my face.

Honest opinions please. Should I have laughed along or would you be fuming? Thank you!

I have come in for some stick about challenging the dated use of ‘air hostess’. Cabin crew/flight attendants have to have fairly rigorous training, they are responsible for all our safety and have to deal with some frightful behaviour (like that of the man in question). So let’s not demean their job. I’m not for one minute condoning his attempt at ‘ bants’.

What a loser you are . Not only has the OP had to put up with an idiot husband she comes on here hoping for some empathy and you turn up .
God, women moan about misogyny yet they are often each others worst enemy .

Keep your hair on. This is AIBU not Relationships.
This woman has married a creepy loser. She needs to read him the riot act not sit sobbing on a transfer bus.

Main reason cabin crew are onboard is for safety. Onboard service is just used to try and keep the chickens quiet & distracted during the flight. My time as cabin crew finished due to a pretty serious incident. Amazing how passengers suddenly respect you when things go wrong. However after that and many years of flying with a lack of respect by many passengers, I was more than happy to leave. When people ask do I miss it, I miss my colleagues but that’s about all.

If your DH is the sensible type I'm not surprised he didnt want to approach two men in an amusement arcade to tell them off. Could have resulted in him getting a sore face! Or worse! It's not worth it for a few comments.

No its not.
Safety is their main responsibility on board.
Educate yourself, preferably before you spout more crap.

In the OP's place, I'd be having a sharp word with her DH.

Re: terminology.

I'd say that "attendant" suggests subservience from an etymological point of view, whereas "hostess" or "host" suggests that the aircraft is the person's domain. The expression "cabin crew" is probably the most neutral term, though the last time that I was on a plane the pilot seemed to use it mean all the staff, including those flying the plane.

So far as pp's point about "police officer" etc being "easier", I'm not so sure. There are times when you do need to be gender specific, and I'd say that "female police officer" is a bit more of a "mouthful" than "policewoman".

Can't believe how many people on here think the following is ok:

Openly flirting with someone else in front of you.
I flirt; dh presumably flirts. We both look. But not with the other sitting right there!

Reducing a professional woman to a sex object.

Modelling the kind of behaviour to nod daughter.

Even if it was a stupid, ill thought out remark, he didn't have to say it out loud.

’Loser’ ‘bitch’. Do you enjoy name calling? Oh dear.

Well, my husband never made such a comment (20 years married) and probably never will, but I definitely wouldn't shed tears over this.
A bit of an overreaction.

Regarding terminology as this seems a topic here. Cabin crew are the crew operating in the cabin itself, flight crew are the pilots. My husband is an airline pilot. I was never insulted by the term air hostess as it was a common description years ago and generally never said disrespectfully, although as I said it’s 25 years ago since I left so maybe crew nowadays don’t like it. Worst I got called to my face was ‘tart with a cart’ that some bloke thought hilarious, it’s very tedious dealing with such dicks! 🙄

I never called you a loser, that was someone else.

I stand by the bitch comment.

I agree it was not a good thing to do and I would not be happy either but I think it's too much to say he reduced her to a sex object, he just thought she was attractive and presumably cheery. And as for not having to say it out loud unfortunately I myself have very occasionally said something out loud then regretted it, it does happen. But I agree with OP I wouldn't be happy if my partner did that to me.

It’s not a very sisterly term though is it, especially from someone who claims female solidarity? Ah well.

Oh god, what a wanker. Does he often behave like this, when your daughter is around?

A lot of us are actually from the 70’s. Not sure what we can do about that?

Air hostess is a bit of an outdated term yes, but it was actually the normal description for cabin crew back then… “in the olden days”.

Mark my words, one day you will find that the everyday phrases you use will become old fashioned and derided, too.

It's the kind of prickish comment I am not in the least bit surprised someone's husband on Mumsnet has said and I would be mortified if anyone close to me (including my adult sons!) said.

No because he's not gay.

I was born in the late 1950’s 😂

Ok I stand corrected on this one.

I never said that either? 😂Have you got your reading glasses on dear? Don't worry it's easy to get confused when you're making friends left right and centre.

The past was indeed another country...those easily offended might want to look away now rather than watch the 1969 BOAC advert below.

BTW agree with a pp re terminolgy, Cabin Crew work in the cabin, those on the flight deck are usually referred to as Flight crew or Tech Crew (as in technical).

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=wH7WW0x_lx0

One word - ICK!!
he’s just made himself look so unattractive