Really want to swim in my pool but I won’t

[Sheateallthehummusagain]

It’s ridiculous, live abroad so it’s very hot, have a large above ground pool. It’s getting darker now, I have lights all around it and in the garden and the water is warm. I just never go in it though! especially not in the day. We are overlooked by a couple of houses, but not hugely and i’m sure they wouldn’t be looking.
I’m the same at the beach, long to swim in the sea, but don’t anymore
It’s down to feeling self conscious now, i’m a large size 16. Dd keeps asking me to go in and I feel like i’m letting her down now 😔

Does anyone feel the same?

Dd keeps asking me to go in and I feel like i’m letting her down now

Sorry to be blunt...you are letting her down. None of your neighbours will give a flying fuck that you're in the pool (because, duh, What's a pool for?!), and will care even less what you look like.

You've got one life! Get in the pool!

Do it OP, you’ll feel great, rise above feelings of doubt, am bigger than you and would be in there like a shot, sod neighbour s

Just get in the pool. Put shorts and tshirt on if it makes you feel self conscious wearing a swim suit.

no one is going to think anything and probably won’t see that much of you once you’re in anyway.

Just get in the pool. No one cares and are t watching you.

Just go and jump in, you will feel so proud of yourself afterwards. I'm so jealous that you have a pool

Get in that pool girl! I’m so envious. I’ve just had a shoulder replacement and would love to be back in the pool but it’s out of the question at the moment. I usually swim five times a week and so miss it!

make the most of it while you can.

Omg go for it! Literally no one cares as much as you do about your body! Guaranteed!! Enjoy the warm pool please. The only reason I never go in pools is because they are cold 🥶 🥶

Get in!

You are letting her down though.

Surely she's more important than what randoms may or may not (very likely not) think about your size?

Your dd loves you and wants to have fun with you. She does not care what you look like! Also think about the behaviour you're modelling, she will soon understand. Would you want her to learn to put her life on hold because of weight?

I grew up with this and battled disordered eating for years as a result. Now i push myself to do anything my girls ask so I dont pass on the insecurities. Its really tough but grit your teeth and do it for dd. You will both feel brilliant if you do.

You can do it!

We were at a waterpark today and there were so few fucks given, it was, well, unbelievable. Great too, why not enjoy life rather than observe it?

Nobody cares about you, OP, except your DD. Don't waste these years.

Honestly, you just have to do it. Fake it till you make it. No-one pays as much attention to other people as we think they do, and it was having kids that made me determined not to show or pass on any body confidence issues...so I will prance in to the sea at any given opportunity with my head held high.

My mum said this to me when I was complaining about something similar and worried that other people would be looking… ‘bubblybath178…you’re just not that interesting’ 😂

You kind of had to be there to hear the tone of it because written down it comes across as really mean. But actually, what she was saying is that other people aren’t as interested in you as you might think. Just do what you want 🤷‍♀️

I hate swimming costumes and bikinis. So I bought a short sleeved rash vest, and a pair of swimming shorts. V comfortable, and relaxing to swim in.

Oh my goodness me - just get in the pool! Get in. It will be lovely. I promise you no one is looking. And enjoy having fun with your DD. That’s what she’ll remember when she’s older: you having fun together not what you look like.

Definitely go for it, no one cares, genuinely!

I used to feel embarrassed of my size 18 body but I realised that no one else care and really you see people of all shapes and sizes on holiday! I find it very liberating.

I’ve lost 3 stone and I’m more toned but I still have a lot of saggy skin. I don’t care, I will continue to swim, sunbathe, do whatever I wish, same as when I was bigger.

Go for it! I'm a size 22. I swim. I give no fucks.

Don't let her down.

Get in, you'll love it and nobody else will think a single thought about it.

Go .... jump in.

OP, no one cares... except your DD. She is dying for you to swim with her. Appreciate what you have and get in the water!

Stop being ridiculous and get in that pool!

No one else gives a damm what you look like.

Thanks everyone, feel so shit that I can’t just ket go 😔 it’s like I can’t enjoy myself

i’m fun with her in other ways and she wouldn’t know it was down to how I feel

You are letting all these people who are supposedly watching you and judging you be more important to you than your DD. That's not right, is it?

Literally no one cares what size you are sweetheart - and 16 is a very normal size.

Please go swimming with your little girl and make memories together.

Here to echo what everyone else has said: get in. Right now!

Nobody gives a flying fig what you look like - everyone's too preoccupied with themselves. Think about it - do you look at other women swimming and think anything other than "oh look, there's a woman swimming!"

And also, I don't know if this makes it better or worse tbh, but I actually find it quite reassuring - everyone already knows what size you are. Clothes aren't a magic portal that transform you into a different person. Everyone has already seen you, they know what you look like, it won't be a surprise to them in literally any way to see you in a swimsuit.

Life's too short for this OP. You don't owe anyone skinniness.

Get in the damn pool! We're all waiting for the selfie 😉

Life’s too short to worry about things like that, get in the pool! Enjoy time with your DD and feel proud of yourself!