Really want to swim in my pool but I won’t

[Sheateallthehummusagain]

It’s ridiculous, live abroad so it’s very hot, have a large above ground pool. It’s getting darker now, I have lights all around it and in the garden and the water is warm. I just never go in it though! especially not in the day. We are overlooked by a couple of houses, but not hugely and i’m sure they wouldn’t be looking.
I’m the same at the beach, long to swim in the sea, but don’t anymore
It’s down to feeling self conscious now, i’m a large size 16. Dd keeps asking me to go in and I feel like i’m letting her down now 😔

Does anyone feel the same?

Good on you getting in

This is your own pool so you can do as you please in the privacy of your own garden, there's no one watching. If anyone does look they are probably being envious of you in a lovely pool.

Size 16 isn't big.

When you're in a pool it's really hard to see what someone is wearing or what they look like.

Enjoy it, I wish I had one myself

This internet weirdie is so frigging proud of you!

Like many others, I’ve been there and I’m continually working on my confidence too. It’s so liberating to start not giving a fuck.

i bet it’s going to be hot tomorrow day. Make sure you get in that pool. You can do it! 📣😍😃

My thoughts are:
1.Turn down the lights.
2.Plant some high hedges.
3.Don't worry about what total strangers may think of your appearance.

I went on holiday to Cyprus and swam.every morning and evening for a week and lost weight, despite enjoying the lovely food, so you might not be size 16 in a couple of weeks. You lucky thing having a lovely pool. Tomorrow get in that pool, do it for all us mumsnetters who a cheering you on and wanting to join you!

Look at it this way OP - On your death bed, are you more likely to say:

'Well, at least I didn't swim!'

or

'What a shame I didn't swim...'

?

Sorry, but your neighbours really don't give a shit what you look like....

I ended up buying a plain black swimsuit of the heave everything up and in if that's a possibility. I did look better with a bit more strucure and it's perfectly comfortable. The other thing is a sarong - you could walk down and shrug it off before you get in the water. But really I don't think anybody's looking and I'm fairly sure your neighbours are not all ripped with minimal body fat. I tend to swim at dusk anyway to avoid having to cover myself in waterproof sunblock.

Get in the pool op and make it a habit. It’s a fun exercise. Even if it does not help you with weight ( or who knows maybe it can), it is a fun thing to do with your dd and mentally very relaxing too. Get the kind of swimwear you will feel comfortable in and get in the pool.

Just read your update well done 👏

Let them look. Let them be snide, or jealous, or happy for you or ignore you.
Let yourself enjoy the pool. Let yourself be happy. Let your child spend time with you.
life is too short to worry about what other people think!

I'm on a long haul holiday and thanks to the buffet my swimwear is a little snug.
I have plus size long shorts and a long top.
I am in the pool all day with my kids doing handstands and messing around.
I really don't care what other people think of me. The look on my kids faces when I went down the fast slide was priceless. Make memories and just have a fuck it moment or 3. Xx

No one but you cares what you look like.

Amazing OP!

Get in during the day wearing leggings and t-shirt if you have to!

You can always take them off and swim in your swimsuit if you feel freer once submerged.

Why dont you start on your own as an excercise. Get some small weights and walk up and down the pool and put a bit of music on and move. I used to go to an excercise class in a pool when i lived aborad. I was overweight and the class was for people who needed the water to help with movement. They had an excercise bike, trampoline amd some small weights and we would rotate round the stations to music. You could do something similat in your pool when everyone is out to get started.

I'm a couple of sizes bigger than you and avoided swimming for a good decade, maybe closer to 2, until I had DS.

I don't think it's fair to make them miss out because of our insecurities.

Go to any water park and you'll see people twice your size splashing around with their little ones. Nobody cares.

I really hope your evening swim has broken the back off it and you jump in tomorrow in the day time.

Really glad you've done it. I felt the same when I lived in a hot country and had a lovely pool, but I made myself go in and it was 😊

Good for you. Sometimes you have to get out of the way of yourself and just do it.

Size 16 is fine. Really nobody looks at each other, definitely not once in the pool. You are better in the pool than out !
Invest in a good costume that puts everything where it should be.

I’m big busted and size 16/18 and swim regularly . I have an underwires sports swimming costume which makes all the difference. But seriously, once in the water, all you really see is your head!

Where do you recommend buying them from?

I've stood in the sea looking like a fucking beached whale in a shorty wetsuit watching the kids. It's the only way to stay in more than 2 minutes. My skin turns purple and red with the cold. Pale white skin, apart from the fucking bruises.(Bastard Hypermobility syndrome meets sticking out lump on garden chairs)

You can not look as bad as that!

Well done!
My mum was very self-conscious about her weight and she would never come swimming with us. I remember how disappointing it was. My dad, who was the same kind of weight range, always came in. Mum took us to our swimming lessons but never joined us and wouldn’t even come swimming on holiday.

Seriously. No one is looking at you.

I’m larger than you and go in our pool every day. We live in Florida and I couldn’t cope without the pool to cool off in. Who cares what people think?

Swim in the evening. A sunset swim is divine.

Honestly OP just do it either really early or really late and hopefully in there you will realise it wasn't that bad and even if people do see, they won't be staring and are probably jealous of you being in there.

Literally just a case of taking the plunge! 🌊