Families that don't do anything with children

[Countryspaniel]

In my line of work I come into contact with a lot of families. Over the summer it got me thinking why some families don't do anything with children.

Why is it that some people just sit around at home day after day? I'm realistic that not everyone has money but you don't need money for a lot of things.

There are parks, community events, walking, bike rides, Picnics, library, museums etc.

I can't imagine why you would want to sit at home day after day without expanding children's experiences.

Oh and @cha04 I've just spent a fortune decorating my house to make it nice for my children, not that its any of your business, and we are fortunate enough to have a nice garden they can play in, making mud pies, bug hotels, and plant things. We have plenty of fun without having to leave the home every day. Some people just lack the imagination to be able to do things without it being some organised activity outside of the home. And some of us have compassion and empathy for those who don't have access to the things we do. Might be something for you to work on.

If a young child is being kept home with no activities outside the home over the whole summer, then there are a whole lot of other problems in that family. The summer is then just a snapshot of wider issues.

Everyone else just muddles along. From the performative over-schedulers to the ‘boredom leads to creativity’ extremes, with most people reaching a reasonable balance in between.

It’s hard work getting out and about, they can’t be bothered and should never have had children in the first place.

Trying to over explain your life tells me it’s absolute bull

And coming on here being foul mouthed and personally insulting people (to the point you've had comments removed) tells everyone what kind of person you are. I bet your kids love being around you. I wouldn't be surprised if they go no contact when they're old enough.

My 7 year old (suspected ADHD) will complain all day if we do anything that doesn’t directly benefit him. We still take him but it really spoils the day.

for example, we live next to the airport and it was the air show this weekend so we took them to watch the Red Arrows take off. We were there 15-20 minutes (let him take his scooter with him) and he just complained how he didn’t like planes. Sucks the fun out of everything.

It’s a shame this thread has descended into mindless insults as it is quite an interesting discussion.

I think we all know in our bones that leaving children to fester in front of the TV or on social media instead of taking them out for exercise or culturally enriching activities in the school holidays is lazy, sub-optimal parenting (health-related exceptions aside).

No one is saying every single day of the holidays must be filled with back-to-back activities nor that one must spend a fortune. This is simply about getting them out of the house and out and about engaging with the world.

But this is MN so of course there are reams and reams of obtuse nonsense.

Oooh really got to you haven’t I. Maybe go on that bike ride chill yourself out

Maybe go do some gardening? Its therapeutic you know 😉

Can get out from my 75th floor flat unfortunately

Get the lift fixed then

There is no lift, my poor kids don’t see the light of day poor me

Aw diddums. Can you not use those all-knowing psychic powers of yours to get this weeks lottery numbers so you can move?

I literally am the other end of the scale and CAN'T function indoors. I don't know how to entertain myself or kids indoors at all. Traditionally I've had to be put off the house for at least half the day. And no, not spending money..... Just walking, visiting parks, sitting in different spaces even.....
I always imagine that people who stay home have the sort of kids who play with toys or lego or do crafts and stuff. My kids just havnt been interested in that.

🥱 bored of entertaining a lazy no-hoper.

Yes, I can see how you must get bored of yourself quite regularly

Thanks for this @Ilovechocolatelimesandsherbertlemons

I talk a lot to my child, and we go over the day together every night for about 20 minutes. But yes, that’s a welcome nudge to not let the reading slip (he’s only 8)… he’s naturally very sporty, and so it’s a battle against both the football and the screen.

The thing is , by the time you exclude the kids that say they did nothing , despite doing loads of, the kids of working parents that are in clubs or childcare(this is one form of “did nothing “ because it’s the norm) or entertain themselves during working hours , the kids who do go places even if it’s once a week , or at the weekend , or every other(third) day or whatever other combination, the kids that have loads of entertainment, enrichment and activities at hope and are happy to be at home,the kids who don’t go out much for very understandable, significant reasons (poverty, SEN, disabilities, etc.) and any combination of these , how many kids are there actually left that not only stay in every single day (no visits to family or even going to the shops) glued to a screen and nothing else for the whole 6 weeks?

We’re talking a very , very small minority, that can’t be reached or helped by being all sneery and holier than thou on MN.

Where I live buses are free all summer for children U16. There are lots of things you can do for free.

I remember when mine were tiny the village used to put on a free bus once a week to a local attraction (free such as beach, large open area). The only people who actually got the bus took their kids out anyway. Lots just didn’t want to go out for the day.

I also disagree with having to buy things in a shop or cafe. I never offered & just used to take stuff with me. We had an occasional ice cream but that was pretty much it. I also don’t have an issue saying no if they ask. As teens they rarely ask for things.

I think the issue nowadays is having a giant TV on all day or playing on an iPad. I don’t think that’s quite the same as kids doing LEGO or baking or getting a paddling pool out.

Sadly I think the internet has killed off this sort of childhood. They’re never allowed to get so bored they have to resort to making things up, reading, writing stories etc Obviously some families are like this but they tend to be strict on internet use.

Agree. I don't think the OP meant that people should go out with their children everyday, but the longer the discussion goes, the more extreme it gets.

Lucky you with the free bus fares. Where I live children over 5 are charged at three quarters of the adult fare.

Has anyone come on and said 'yeah I probably could do better '? If not, ill put my hand up. Im not the worst, im not the best. Somedays I just want to be at home and not 'on'

My daughter does loads and she's 8. Even after she's done after school clubs she asks to do something else like a cycle ride.
People can be judgemental about kids who do a lot as well - they don't understand how much energy some kids have.
We know two (separate) dads who just do nothing with their kids and with both of them it's just because they can't be arsed as they will freely tell you.

My kids have done loads over the summer holidays, park, beach, softplay, cinema, sleep overs at grandparents, non stop painting/messy play at home.. still if anyone asks then what they've been doing they say "nothing just on my tablet/TV" lol