Do childless couples have better sex lives?

[cjfrh1985]

…..because the woman’s body doesn’t change (assuming she doesn’t gain weight, and obviously ageing happens)?

Definitely. Even when the kids get older they stay awake longer and by the time they are asleep so are you. If anything it was easier when they were younger

I don't even know what that means 😂

Depends on the couple and the ages of the children etc and the same for the childless people! Me and DH have always had a good sex life. Our kids have now moved out and our sex life is a bit up and down (no pun intended) because of my libido changes in perimenopause. The shape of my body and his has never made a difference to our sex life and we have both been thin and fat over the last 23 years.

Ok, well kids stand a good chance of ruining your sex life for a while, but the way your body has changed (which can be minimal you know) is likely to be far down the list of reasons.

Less interruptions and more spontaneity, surely that alone is better

I had the most active sex life when TTC our first, does that count?

Mumsnet used to be full of witty intelligent posts, and now we get threads like this full of post like this shit.

"Skinnier wife" that's the key to good sex.

Or posts from childless women talking about their sister's broken child bearing vaginas, charming. If the sex were that good, it wouldn't all be ONS my friend. You/they would want to go there twice.

Yeah, I know quite a few women who went back to the gym after babies and kept their old figure (with stretch marks of course, but those are nothing to be ashamed of).

There’s also the fact that menopause changes all women’s bodies, and sex drive declines with age for everyone anyway.

I think you’re starting from the wrong premise if you think having a body that hasn’t birthed children is what’s central to a good sex life. I think sex-drive, lifestyle, health and good communication are better predictors. I think having small children means that couples’ sex lives always almost take a hit. But whether that means childless couples have better sex over a lifetime or not, I don’t know. It will depend on so much.

Thanks. If your children have moved out you must be 40//50s?

I’m 20s but I always thought that by 50 people were having much less sex anyway (not none, but less).

Perimenopause is having way more impact than pregnancy/childbirth/kids did. I lost the "baby weight" after DS quite easily, was back in size 10 etc. The weight gain in perimenopause is horrendous and I can't shift the tummy!!

Yes I think you’re right - childless couples, married for years, don’t be in a constant state of passion and wanting to rip each others’ clothes off 😅They’ll see the worst of each other like any other couple does.

Are you male or female?

For us, probably yes.

We've got more time, more energy, and my body is pretty much the same at 41 as it was at 18 - I'm exactly the same size and shape and have had the time, money and inclination to maintain an exercise regime my entire life.

We often have Sunday afternoon sex because we can.

Oh man don’t say that!

The whole premise of the OP is that sex life is based on the hotness of the female partner. So unless the OP is a lesbian (and I don't know who any talk like that), I think we know the OP's sex

In your twenties, but have 1985 in your username? Interesting.

Just be honest with the woman you're with and say:

"I don't want to have children. I'm trying to convince you to think the same so I've gone on Mumsnet for proof that having children makes your sex life crap. This is because I am such a red hot lover, I'm certain the thought of less sex with me will override any desire you might have for children"

Problem solved.

My body is still pretty decent. I expect menopause will change it far more than pregnancy and childbirth did.

The issue is more available time. I was never much of an evening sex person, more in the morning. That’s pretty much impossible with young kids. It’s not that much fun when you’re constantly listening out for small people on the move or shouting out for you.

Are you bragging that you have weekly sex at a time that most people are home and available for sex? I'm confused. I'm also confused that anyone has the exact body shape as when they were 18 and isn't 19.

I dont think "sex drive declines with age for everyone" is true.

Sorry I don't understand your last sentence.

My friends with kids can't just disappear upstairs for an hour at 3pm on a Sunday to shag loudly, no. They're kind of....parenting then.

Yes definitely way better sex with no dc. I have dc and its not the fact that they've changed my body its just having sex with dc around isn't as easy. and it gets even worse as the dc is older. No way I could enjoy sex with my teens in the room next door, if they heard anything they'd know exactly what we were doing. DC definitely ruined our sex life.

Men change too. Their testosterone levels can fall as they age, plenty of older men have a much lower sex drive, whether they have kids or not, and their bodies change! Both men and women lose muscle mass as they age and tend towards a paunch. Most men eventually lose some hair or even quite a lot. Lots of men get saggier chests etc.

My sex life hasn't decreased because my body has changed but due to teenagers/young adults who are always around and up later than us milling about.