Husband has completely ruined our weekend away

[Breezeopal]

We were supposed to be going away today in the UK for a short break with our two children (both under 4).

DH went out straight from work to see friends which had been arranged for weeks but in his words was just to be a meal and quick catch up. I had barely heard from him all evening and he didn’t reply to the couple of messages I sent after the time he said he’d be home.

At about 10pm one of his friends called me and said I would need to pick him up as he can’t get in a taxi because he had been sick and it was on his clothes. Pub about 15 minutes drive away. I said I can’t leave my two children so ended up having to call my Mum (who was in bed) to come to mine whilst I drove to pick him up.

Husband was absolutely slaughtered, it turned out he hadn’t ate anything they didn’t go to dinner and had a pub crawl instead. On the way home it started absolutely stinking and when we got home it transpired he had soiled himself!!

We don’t have a bedroom spare so he has spent the night on the sofa and is in no fit state to do anything currently- he was meant to be driving.

We were supposed to leave by 9am to make the most of day 1 which there is no chance of happening.

I feel like saying fuck it and not going at all but I want a nice time with my children so I am torn…

You need far less than you think for a weekend. Reduce what youve packed and go.

Can you take a few essentials for the day and get there in your car. Pack up his car and tell him to meet you there, what a fucking prick though I’m so sorry

Yes fit what you can in your car. You’ll have the passenger seat free.

Awful behaviour by him

Why can’t you drive his car ? If you can drive one car, you can drive any car. If it’s about Insurance either check your policy, to see if you are covered to drive other cars, or get a week Lond policy … won’t cost very much.

Then pack the car and leave.

Stop allowing his behaviour to dictate your weekend.

Take your car with some belongings and he can follow in his.

What a twat. Go without him. I find it hard to imagine that you can’t fit what you need for you and 2 kids for a weekend into even a small car

Absolutely gross…. Can you take yourself and kids out for a fun day closer to home with all the treats and leave him wallowing? This is the first day of your holiday, just in a different location. He has to clean your car, apologise to you and your mum, and generally sort himself out today. He will be in no fit state to drive today.
tomorrow, you’re up first thing and on the road early…

I'd second the idea of you just leaving and going with the basics. Washbasin, 2 changes of clothes. That will surely fit in your car?

Does your Mum have a bigger car? Could you go with her? I venture to suggest you’d have a far better time with her than with grumpy hungover DH!

Or he can pack his car himself.

That’s awful, you must be fuming! Can you take your Mum instead of DH and try and have a lovely break?

While you’re away, DH can reflect… whilst cleaning the house from top to bottom, doing a food shop, new toy each for the kids and flowers for you.

Fill his car up. Drive yours, he can come later. It's a shit situation (quite literally!) but don't be a martyr and ruin things for your kids and you. Pull yourself together and go.

That's truly vile - so drunk he couldn't control his bowels! The car must surely stink of shit and vomit. I would struggle to stay marroed to this man.

I think he didn't want to go , is that a possibility OP?

My mum has prior commitments unfortunately with friends staying over for the weekend from today. She was far from impressed and I was so embarrassed.

He must have some serious issues and be pretty miserable to get in that state, poor guy.

Take a few things, go in your car and he can follow with the rest of the things this afternoon.
I know lots of people will say 'divorce him' etc but just try and salvage the weekend and afterwards, have a think about the bigger picture, if there is one.
Don't spoil the weekend for the children (dont let HIM spoil it any further)

Go without him. Can your mum go with you instead?

Ummm.... He's on the sofa, he's not going.... Get yours and the kids stuff in your car and set off on your weekend break away...

He can deal with his own shit at home, by himself...Bloody idiot!!

He shat himself?! I know a lot of hardcore types but none who have ever shat themselves!
the men who get so pissed they pee in corner of the bedrooms thinking it’s the loo is bad enough!

Quite honestly if he was so drunk he will not be fit to drive anytime today

My father used to do this kind of thing. Take less stuff, go without him.

Show the children that life doesn't have to stop because Daddy is in a self-induced mess and that they're more important than his hangover.

Go without him 100%. Pack enough for today/tonight - you have a whole passenger seat and footwell free, then pack the rest in his car to join you later/tomorrow.

Go without him. You only need a small bag each.

If honestly defies me the stories of men I read on every every single day.

I’d be finding a way to squeeze the things into my car so I could go without him. He’d be needing sometime to find himself somewhere else to live if he was married to me. No way would I be putting up with that. I hope you’re not cleaning his soiled clothes.