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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To think that white British/ American etcmen are just as much a threat to women as migrants?

843 replies

malificent7 · 08/08/2025 12:47

I am not excusing grooming, paedophile sex rings and unmonitored immigration at all but I hate all these protests.
I know that my white male ex teacher is a sex offender. Not to mention the Epstein scandal.
Aibu to think that ALL men are a danger to women...not just men of different ethnicities/ religions etc?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
27
GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 15:39

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 15:37

We already have statistics on sexual assault and the perpetrators of sexual assault. Half of sexual assaults are carried out by a partner or ex partner and 6 in 7 rapes are carried out by someone the survivor knows. Therefore women and girls are in danger from people they know rather than complete strangers.

Can you explain how ethnicity of the perpetrator is important additional information please?

So you don’t think it’s important?

TopPocketFind · 09/08/2025 15:46

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 15:39

So you don’t think it’s important?

Can you explain how ethnicity of the perpetrator is important additional information please?

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 15:47

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 15:39

So you don’t think it’s important?

I've said three times that we have detailed information on sexual assault. You were saying that we need further research in order to protect women and girls. I'm asking you how information on ethnicity would protect women and girls.

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 15:49

SpunkyPombear · 09/08/2025 15:38

Remember the mass sexual assault in Germany on nye?

Of course, can you expand on that please?

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 15:52

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 15:47

I've said three times that we have detailed information on sexual assault. You were saying that we need further research in order to protect women and girls. I'm asking you how information on ethnicity would protect women and girls.

If it were to be proven that certain demographics offended at a higher rate, then you don’t think that would be important regarding things like police resources?

You’re being disingenuous to think acknowledging patterns and trends makes no difference. You wouldn’t have been able to make any of the points you have without them.

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 15:57

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 15:52

If it were to be proven that certain demographics offended at a higher rate, then you don’t think that would be important regarding things like police resources?

You’re being disingenuous to think acknowledging patterns and trends makes no difference. You wouldn’t have been able to make any of the points you have without them.

The electorate can vote for a system that checks prior to entry.

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:05

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 15:52

If it were to be proven that certain demographics offended at a higher rate, then you don’t think that would be important regarding things like police resources?

You’re being disingenuous to think acknowledging patterns and trends makes no difference. You wouldn’t have been able to make any of the points you have without them.

We're already aware of patterns and trends regarding violence against women, including sexual assault. The majority of women are sexually assaulted by people they know. In the UK, they're more likely to be assaulted by their partner, the majority of which are white British.

Talking about police resources, the police are busy this weekend standing outside hotels with patriots letting off flares, wrapped in flags and trying to intimidate the occupants. IMO, their time is better spent dealing with serious issues like domestic abuse.

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:05

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 15:57

The electorate can vote for a system that checks prior to entry.

A system that checks what?

Boomer55 · 09/08/2025 16:07

As a Boomer, I've never felt threatened by any of them. Some, of both types, are pests, without a doubt, but easily slapped down. 🙄

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:11

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:05

A system that checks what?

.

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:11

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:05

A system that checks what?

.

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:11

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:05

A system that checks what?

If we had a different system we could check for serious crime prior to entry. Or if the information is not available decide whether we should allow entry.

A recent example is all Ukrainians (who were women and dc) were vetted before entry, that’s a different system to the asylum one we use now.

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:11

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:05

We're already aware of patterns and trends regarding violence against women, including sexual assault. The majority of women are sexually assaulted by people they know. In the UK, they're more likely to be assaulted by their partner, the majority of which are white British.

Talking about police resources, the police are busy this weekend standing outside hotels with patriots letting off flares, wrapped in flags and trying to intimidate the occupants. IMO, their time is better spent dealing with serious issues like domestic abuse.

We’re aware because there trends because there are records, and statistics!

You keep saying what difference would statistics make, and then…. citing statistics!

We have no way of tracking trends on ethnicity without them.

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:13

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:11

If we had a different system we could check for serious crime prior to entry. Or if the information is not available decide whether we should allow entry.

A recent example is all Ukrainians (who were women and dc) were vetted before entry, that’s a different system to the asylum one we use now.

Edited

How would this help if they are coming by from counties that don’t report rape in the same way that we do?

I’m all for this by the way. But can’t see a way that the electorate could reasonably ask for this in a way that doesn’t get them accused of nationalism and racism.

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:14

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:13

How would this help if they are coming by from counties that don’t report rape in the same way that we do?

I’m all for this by the way. But can’t see a way that the electorate could reasonably ask for this in a way that doesn’t get them accused of nationalism and racism.

I agree with you btw. If they don’t report it in the same way then let us decide what to do as voters.

Re your last point, maybe but women tend to be rode over until they do stand up for stuff. See recent FWS court case and general voices for change.

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:21

Some of the same tactics to stop women for single sex are being used again. I’d say keep going. Some people and politicians won’t like it but it gets us change.

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:21

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:05

We're already aware of patterns and trends regarding violence against women, including sexual assault. The majority of women are sexually assaulted by people they know. In the UK, they're more likely to be assaulted by their partner, the majority of which are white British.

Talking about police resources, the police are busy this weekend standing outside hotels with patriots letting off flares, wrapped in flags and trying to intimidate the occupants. IMO, their time is better spent dealing with serious issues like domestic abuse.

Another reason for having accurate data is that it stops people ‘filling in the gaps’

If you’re concerned about people protesting outside the hotels, surely you’d want to ‘prove’ their fears are baseless?

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:25

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:11

We’re aware because there trends because there are records, and statistics!

You keep saying what difference would statistics make, and then…. citing statistics!

We have no way of tracking trends on ethnicity without them.

I'll break it down.

A. Women are in danger from men they know. The majority from their partner, followed by people they know eg friend, family, colleague.

B. We already have data on VAWAG which gives us information on who they are most in danger from.

C. Stranger assault is rare.

Saying that the ethnicity of the perpetrator is important in order to protect women and girls is something I'm asking you to expand on as I don't see how it does. You keep saying that we need the information and I'm asking you why. How does tracking ethnicity trends protect women?

Do you agree that resources would be better spent on educating people on domestic abuse and rape culture, investing in the court process, training professionals such as the police, better street lighting and support services specialising in VAWAG?

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:26

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:25

I'll break it down.

A. Women are in danger from men they know. The majority from their partner, followed by people they know eg friend, family, colleague.

B. We already have data on VAWAG which gives us information on who they are most in danger from.

C. Stranger assault is rare.

Saying that the ethnicity of the perpetrator is important in order to protect women and girls is something I'm asking you to expand on as I don't see how it does. You keep saying that we need the information and I'm asking you why. How does tracking ethnicity trends protect women?

Do you agree that resources would be better spent on educating people on domestic abuse and rape culture, investing in the court process, training professionals such as the police, better street lighting and support services specialising in VAWAG?

If you don’t think it’s important, why was it one of the suggestions to implement following the grooming gangs review?

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:33

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:21

Another reason for having accurate data is that it stops people ‘filling in the gaps’

If you’re concerned about people protesting outside the hotels, surely you’d want to ‘prove’ their fears are baseless?

It would inflame tensions, not calm things down as this unrest is caused by a lot of misinformation. For example, many people think that the majority of immigrants in the UK are 'illegal' but they represent 4% of immigrants. I also don't see how it protects women and girls.
https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/nearly-half-of-brits-misunderstand-key-uk-immigration-fact_uk_6891e62ae4b0ea04dda0a58a

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:36

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:26

If you don’t think it’s important, why was it one of the suggestions to implement following the grooming gangs review?

I'm not derailing the thread in order to talk about grooming gangs.

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:39

You’re simultaneously arguing that unrest is caused by ‘misinformation’ and then asking ‘how would it help’ when I’m advocating for accurate information.

There’s a reason that the grooming gangs report advocated for reporting ethnicity.

Its relevant to the conversation on how recording ethnicity could possible be helpful to anyone in any way shape or from. That’s not derailing, it’s an example of when these statistics could be helpful (which is what you asked for!)

RavenclawWitchy · 09/08/2025 16:48

The fact that any man can commit these crimes is irrelevant. The issies is that those who are in the country ILLEGALLY to begin with and being protected and cared for by the state are perpetuating these crimes. Just because anyone can commit a crime does not mean that we should accept more criminals into society.

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:49

GoldThumb · 09/08/2025 16:39

You’re simultaneously arguing that unrest is caused by ‘misinformation’ and then asking ‘how would it help’ when I’m advocating for accurate information.

There’s a reason that the grooming gangs report advocated for reporting ethnicity.

Its relevant to the conversation on how recording ethnicity could possible be helpful to anyone in any way shape or from. That’s not derailing, it’s an example of when these statistics could be helpful (which is what you asked for!)

Could you quote or @ me please. If you don't, I'm not alerted that you've responded. Thanks.

I see there's confusion here.

A. There's a lot of misinformation around about asylum seekers, much of it created by people with an agenda. As you can see with the article I posted, people believe that most immigration into the UK is 'illegal'. That's very far from the truth despite statistics being freely available.

B. The focus here is VAWAG and you haven't explained why this additional information protects women. I'm interested to know.

C. If you want to start a thread on grooming gangs to discuss the Pakistani heritage of the perpetrators, don't let me stop you.

EasternStandard · 09/08/2025 16:51

MiloMinderbinder925 · 09/08/2025 16:49

Could you quote or @ me please. If you don't, I'm not alerted that you've responded. Thanks.

I see there's confusion here.

A. There's a lot of misinformation around about asylum seekers, much of it created by people with an agenda. As you can see with the article I posted, people believe that most immigration into the UK is 'illegal'. That's very far from the truth despite statistics being freely available.

B. The focus here is VAWAG and you haven't explained why this additional information protects women. I'm interested to know.

C. If you want to start a thread on grooming gangs to discuss the Pakistani heritage of the perpetrators, don't let me stop you.

A system that checks is better for women and girls.

Much like the vetting for the Ukrainian system.