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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Child’s friend insulted house

341 replies

Spicychili · 28/07/2025 13:00

As heading- my daughter’s 8 year old friend came over to play and kept asking why our house and garden are so small and commenting on it. This is a sore point as most kids at their school have larger houses! I overheard them so didn’t get involved in the discussion. My daughter seemed to brush it off. AIBU to be upset by this or is this normal?

OP posts:
Iamtired123 · 30/07/2025 17:11

My childs friends have asked why we don't have stairs in our house, they wonder where the rest of the house is 😂 it's just cos they're used to having an upstairs downstairs, they're just curious

Spinmerightroundbaby · 30/07/2025 22:14

Petitchat · 29/07/2025 18:15

Here's another example....

I do think the child was repeating her parent's opinion which is why it particularly bothered me

OP's insecurity.

Yet blaming it on a child!
Disgusting.

Show quote history

Why would you think that? Once a child came to a play date at our home years ago and it was the first time she or the parent had seen the home. The parent had never seen my home before then and didn’t have the opportunity to express an opinion on it. Children tend to speak their minds. I had one tell me I was fat about a month ago which didn’t feel great, but it was honest!

Allseeingallknowing · 31/07/2025 15:34

Spinmerightroundbaby · 30/07/2025 22:14

Why would you think that? Once a child came to a play date at our home years ago and it was the first time she or the parent had seen the home. The parent had never seen my home before then and didn’t have the opportunity to express an opinion on it. Children tend to speak their minds. I had one tell me I was fat about a month ago which didn’t feel great, but it was honest!

Show quote history

Children definitely don’t have filters! When my son was small he sat on my Mum’s lap and asked her why she had lots of lines around her mouth!

Laughlikeadrain · 31/07/2025 20:43

Petitchat · 29/07/2025 22:12

Psychologists would have a field day with some of the mumsnetters on here 🤣

Yes - like you! 😂

lots of projection from you.

Spinmerightroundbaby · 31/07/2025 20:59

Allseeingallknowing · 31/07/2025 15:34

Children definitely don’t have filters! When my son was small he sat on my Mum’s lap and asked her why she had lots of lines around her mouth!

Show quote history

You gotta love kids! I think in the moment OP you do feel like ‘ouch’ but unless you know for a fact either having heard someone criticise your home, it is best to put this sort of thing down to kids being kids. I am sure the mum would be mortified!

NellitheNelephant · 31/07/2025 23:21

Allseeingallknowing · 31/07/2025 15:34

Children definitely don’t have filters! When my son was small he sat on my Mum’s lap and asked her why she had lots of lines around her mouth!

Show quote history

People always tell me that I look young for my age. Not children! A child in the street asked her mother if I was "an old woman" What a bladdy cheek!

january1244 · 02/08/2025 08:24

Username0900 · 28/07/2025 13:17

That scenario is my absolute fear. I recently have moved into a new area and DD into a new school and she has had a few birthday parties at her friends houses and they all have huge houses (owned) with huge gardens and clearly have money.
We live in a housing association property and it is small with a very small garden and although I love it, i would be deeply embarrassed if these children's parents saw my house compared to theirs.
I think at their age your daughters friend just says things as they see it, they probably don't mean anything by it but I would be upset too, I work hard to give my DD what I can but my best doesn't compare at all to what her friends have 😔

Please don’t be embarrassed and please invite those parents around for coffee or wine. They’d likely not care.

Idiot123 · 02/08/2025 18:02

My niece (husbands side) came round for the first time to meet our baby, think she was 6 said our house was SO small. It's a 2 double bed terrace, baring in mind they'd literally just moved from a similar house to something bigger 😂 take it with a pinch of salt, at least they didn't comment on your looks or weight 🫣

CeeJay26 · 02/08/2025 18:48

On the flip side, my child says our house is small compared with her best friend (which is true!). Kids just say what they see, I wouldn’t consider it insulting.

Glitterbomb123 · 02/08/2025 22:10

Spicychili · 28/07/2025 13:00

As heading- my daughter’s 8 year old friend came over to play and kept asking why our house and garden are so small and commenting on it. This is a sore point as most kids at their school have larger houses! I overheard them so didn’t get involved in the discussion. My daughter seemed to brush it off. AIBU to be upset by this or is this normal?

Surely this is a joke? 😭 I can't believe a grown woman would actually be so effected by an 8 year olds comment they'd post to Mumsnet. I can't even believe I'm even commenting on it FML.

Hankunamatata · 02/08/2025 23:12

Urgh some kids have no social graces and complete lack of filter.

EmeraldShamrock000 · 03/08/2025 00:54

Hankunamatata · 02/08/2025 23:12

Urgh some kids have no social graces and complete lack of filter.

Urgh some adults are oversensitive, insecure, and as immature as an 8 year old.

Ronathediva13 · 03/08/2025 08:31

I held a rehearsal at my house once for a play that I was in as our usual rehearsal space was booked. One member of the cast announced at the end that if we needed to do any more rehearsals in somebody’s home we should use her house as it is a lot bigger than mine. I thought that was a bit rude and unnecessary coming from a woman in her 40s who appeared to be showing off a bit. I would not find it rude or upsetting coming from an 8-year-old.
As I am extremely petty, I looked her house up on Google Maps and it was no bigger than mine so I have no idea what she was going on about!!!!!

PollockMullet · 03/08/2025 08:59

Ronathediva13 · 03/08/2025 08:31

I held a rehearsal at my house once for a play that I was in as our usual rehearsal space was booked. One member of the cast announced at the end that if we needed to do any more rehearsals in somebody’s home we should use her house as it is a lot bigger than mine. I thought that was a bit rude and unnecessary coming from a woman in her 40s who appeared to be showing off a bit. I would not find it rude or upsetting coming from an 8-year-old.
As I am extremely petty, I looked her house up on Google Maps and it was no bigger than mine so I have no idea what she was going on about!!!!!

I suppose possible she might have a bigger, knocked-through, open-plan space or something?

Ronathediva13 · 03/08/2025 09:28

PollockMullet · 03/08/2025 08:59

I suppose possible she might have a bigger, knocked-through, open-plan space or something?

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Indeed! But seeing as it was never likely to happen it seemed like such an odd little outburst that it stuck in my mind!!!

Petitchat · 03/08/2025 15:25

Hankunamatata · 02/08/2025 23:12

Urgh some kids have no social graces and complete lack of filter.

🤣 🤣 🤣

Social graces at 8 years of age!

Who is she, a princess ?

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