Furious at DH and his friend bringing someone back to our house

[TiredSaturdayy]

My DH’s friend is staying for the weekend. He lives about 4 hours away and they only see each other once a year. This is perfectly fine with me as I usually get on well with him.

Last night, they both went out into town to catch up. DH got into bed about 1am, I sleep lightly so was woken but soon got to sleep. His friend is staying in our spare bedroom.

I am woken by noises shortly after. I wake DH and ask if he can hear them. He says there’s something he needs to tell me and that his friend met a women in the last bar they were in and INVITED HER HOME! So the noises were infact them ‘at it’ in my spare bedroom.

I go ballistic at DH and ask why he thought this was acceptable. Our DC is away this weekend which is beyond the point. Completely irresponsible to allow a stranger into our house in those circumstances.

I tell DH that if he doesn’t ask her to leave then I will. He says he’ll message his friend. No reply. He’s about to get up and knock on the door when we hear it open and his friend sees her out and she eventually leaves.

DH is asleep still now, I am downstairs absolutely aghast at their behaviour. If he thinks I am sorting out the fry up they kept on about before they went out then they’ve another thing coming.

The friend would be changing the sheets though and either replacing them or taking them to a laundrette 😂

Disgusting and disrespectful. The loose woman is the same - going into a strangers home?!

There was a connection between the two people involved and they hit it off. It's no big deal. She wasnt taken against her will in front of a bunch of people OPs husband knew. As for what OP is upset about I get it, its not very nice to have that going on in your house but as for what the two consenting adults did it's no big deal.

I agree with most of that, what two adults do is up to them but it was a cheek for the guy to take her to his friend's house. The op's husband should have refused to allow it.

However it's all over now, won't happen again.

I agree I just get annoyed at posters who dont seem to believe that some women choose to have casual or even risky sex and that she must have been coerced in some way or taken advantage of whilst drunk. If there was something in OPs story to suggest this then fine but otherwise it's not the topic of the thread.

her safety could easily have been compromised and she would have been in an incredibly vulnerable position.

What were extra risk to the womans at 3am that were not there at 1am?

Should we pin a scarlet 'S' for 'slut' to her clothes? Fucking hell. I thought it was 2025.

Yeah maybe But no reason why it should be really.

It absolutely isn't.

www.theguardian.com/media/mind-your-language/2014/nov/18/mind-your-language-another-think

No, nobody is suggesting that but it was wrong of both of them to use a friend's house in that way.

That's not the point at all though.

Loose woman??! It’s not the Victorian era!

I assume they had all had a lot to dring.

It was in the post I was quoting!

Would I do what she did? Lord, no. But the ‘loose woman’ and similar comments are anachronistic at best and, as you say, not the point of the thread! But that hasn’t stopped people taking the opportunity to display their misogyny all over this thread.

I wouldn't like this. It could be anyone among your personal things. Imagine running into her in the bloody landing! Also, make sure your husband washes the spunky sheets! Gross.

Err the fact he brought a random home doh! She could be anyone. I would not want a total stranger in my home ever. The so called friend was bang out of order and he certainly would not be staying over in my house again!

Although I believe adults do have choice, being a woman, I would worry that the woman was drunk and not capable of consent firstly, as it is a bit risky going off with 2 men, irrelevant if they had explained re OP. I would also worry that if there was to be any argument over consent, and woman said she didn't consent and was forced into whatever she said happened, that the Police were called. Police would also interview the H and OP. Not saying this would happen, but it's just too risky for all 3 adults. It was uncomfortable for OP and possibly could have been more serious than just 2 consenting adults in OP's house. I have done foolish things in drink and regularly hitchhiked alone, even to London on several occasions and I was early 20s then. I have also had men chat me up in pubs and nightclubs when I have been sober, but managed to sort the nice friendly men, looking for a chat or to ask for a date, from the predators. Some people can stay sensible in drink, unfortunately I can't, hence I gave up drinking and going out years ago. We don't know if the woman was single, married, drunk or what actually happened and why she left, hopefully she was ok and just needed to get home. The OP's husband will no doubt have told his friend that you OP, are not at all happy and he owes you an apology. OP may like to suggest that both parties were putting themselves in unknown danger -the woman going off with 2 random unknown men, and the man and your H as they could have been accused of unwanted attention or sexual assault or worse, the woman could also have stolen items. If she was married or cohabiting, her husband/partner could have demanded to know where she had been/why she was late and whole story may have come out and he (her H/Partner may go to OP's house looking for answers So many negative and worrying things can happen these days. I don't see any reason to fall out with your H, OP, just a word of warning for any future conduct when out with one of his mates.

@NotThisShitAgain121 @Alwaysalert

This thread is from August!

It came up on my feed still live as did one from a while ago and people were responding to that. Why do they show as Trending if they have not been resurrected as still happening or whatever.

Absolutely disgusting. Id be horrified that my husband wasn't horrified.so gross 🤢

Not really, she won't know you know.

However I see this is an old thread.