Furious at DH and his friend bringing someone back to our house

[TiredSaturdayy]

My DH’s friend is staying for the weekend. He lives about 4 hours away and they only see each other once a year. This is perfectly fine with me as I usually get on well with him.

Last night, they both went out into town to catch up. DH got into bed about 1am, I sleep lightly so was woken but soon got to sleep. His friend is staying in our spare bedroom.

I am woken by noises shortly after. I wake DH and ask if he can hear them. He says there’s something he needs to tell me and that his friend met a women in the last bar they were in and INVITED HER HOME! So the noises were infact them ‘at it’ in my spare bedroom.

I go ballistic at DH and ask why he thought this was acceptable. Our DC is away this weekend which is beyond the point. Completely irresponsible to allow a stranger into our house in those circumstances.

I tell DH that if he doesn’t ask her to leave then I will. He says he’ll message his friend. No reply. He’s about to get up and knock on the door when we hear it open and his friend sees her out and she eventually leaves.

DH is asleep still now, I am downstairs absolutely aghast at their behaviour. If he thinks I am sorting out the fry up they kept on about before they went out then they’ve another thing coming.

A brothel? She wasn't a sex worker, they were too people that wanted to get intimate in private

To go back to another woman’s home with two men you don’t know? You set your standards abysmally low. I would have thrown you out out immediately. So grim.

How do you know she wasn't a sex worker?
OP knows nothing about this woman other than what her H told her.

And I would suggest taking a woman back to somebody's home where you are a houseguest in order to have sex is not having sex in private. It is sombody else's home and not your private space.
If they wanted sex in private then they should have gone to her home or a hotel.

OP could hear two strangers having sex in her spare room. How is that having sex in private?

Anchorage56 is not bothering to read the quoted history (which as I am not the OP are clearly not the OPs posts) and demanding I explain the quoted history which starts :

VickyEadieofThigh · Today 08:10
I think it's massively disrespectful by the friend and your DH. I'm also wondering about the thinking process of 2 men bringing a woman who doesn't know them back to a strange house - I'd like to think that men are better than this but, here we are.

Well, there you go. I guess I'm grim. People go out, they have a few drinks, they meet someone, they go back with them. There's a lot of pretty nasty judgement of the woman on this thread that I don't like. Yes, maybe your DH friend was a bit rude, but it's not the end of the world. There's a lot of overreacting here. Starting with the OP. I can't imagine turning the woman out in the middle of the night myself.

I'm sorry but your not making any sense!

No, it’s not.

She could be a prostitute, a criminal or anything else, and even if she is just a drunken twat, imagine thinking it is ok to inflict that on YOU in YOUR OWN HOME.

What a drunken piece of shit your husband is.

If you’ve got ‘another thing coming’, you’ve got another think coming | Mind your language

Indeed. It is, unequivocally, another "think" coming.

As in, if he thinks that he has another think coming.

I don’t like the way both men have instantly gone to “oh she was mad for it!” And blamed her, like they were innocent bystanders dragged along. It’s really shitty.

And it’s THINK! Thing is an egg horn of think. Both phrases used now because people have said it wrong for so long now.

I think a lot depends on what's normal in your household, and the replies here reflect that. For some people there are strangers in and out quite a bit and valuable locked away, so if no children home or apt to come home during, then perhaps no problem. But the way your husband said he had to tell you something suggests that he knew this wasn't the norm and wouldn't be OK with you, especially without asking you AHEAD of time.

If the woman was local and was, as your husband seems to imply, out scouting for a one night stand, why didn't she and the friend go back to hers?

Yeah, good point...

You very definitely have a drunken arsehole of a husband problem. Imagine thinking it was ok to drag some unknown drunk into YOUR HOME for his drunken friend to shag. It is breathtakingly disrespectful, not to mention really really dangerous to invite strangers into your home in the middle of the night.

I'd be more annoyed with DH in this situation. Presumably at some point his mate asked if he could bring this woman back and he said yes. Assuming they were all a bit worse for the drink, I doubt he'd have thought anymore into it.

I'd have given him a load of stick in the morning, let them cook their own breakfast, and had a very direct conversation with DH when he left.

Dont worry about it. I did not expect you to understand👍

So your not going to say what point you were hoping to make? You've realised there wasnt one.

Can the grammar police please get on this one too?

Now you have definitely got to be joking right 😆

I can’t believe all the judgey, smacked-arse face comments on here.

Like none of you ever went out pre DH, got pissed and shagged a bloke 😉

Not as a guest in someone else's house, no.

Never

If you think that and had another think
And think that your thinking is correct
You are free to think whatever you think about your thinking.

I can say with certainty I have never gone out and brought a one night stand back to my friends family home to shag yes 😂 this isnt student uni halls, this guy is a grown ass adult, who it sounds like has a girlfriend