To be too scared to go to the doctors about this?

[BertieRosie]

Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 3 years. For most of that time, we haven’t been necessarily ‘trying’ for a baby, but we have certainly not been avoiding it. I am not and never have been on any contraception.
I am worried about why nothing has ever happened, I’ve had a couple of times where my period has come late, so I have done a pregnancy test, and once there seemed to be very faint lines. However, clearly, nothing has ever ever come of it.
I am terrified to go to the doctors and find out that something is wrong with me, and that I will never have children, it is my biggest wish.
My parents had me with IVF, so this causes me even higher concern.

How old are you and your partner OP, and do you know the reason your parents had IVF?

Depending on the answers to those questions I would try not to worry for now though. Even for a young couple actively TTC, timing sex perfectly for tested ovulation dates etc it is totally normal for it to take a year to conceive so if you’ve just been having sex as & when it’s quite possible you’ve just never happened to land around ovulation.

Thank you. We are both very early 20’s. My mum has pcos, so after trying for years, they decided on IVF.

That makes me feel much better, we have never timed or tracked things so I am hoping that’s the case! To be honest, I had kind of assumed it would just happen along the way, as we are both very on board with the idea of if it happens, it happens.

Being scared is never a reason to avoid going to the Dr's OP. Make the appointment today.

I would really try not to worry then, you have plenty of time and as I say if you’re not actively trying then it’s quite possible you’ve just never actually had sex on the right days of the month.

Please don't be scared. It's best to know. Knowledge is power. I wouldn't assume the worst though. The fact you had late periods etc means that something is trying to happen. It can take quite a few times before it takes as a full pregnancy.
But definitely go to the doctor. Your partner maybe should go also.

Early 20s and having unprotected sex for 3 years?

I hope at the very least you have both had STI tests.

Sorry? We’ve been together for those 3 years… I don’t see how our age makes it any different than an older couple doing the same?

don't fear going to the doctors. Even if you have PCOS, that doesn’t mean IVF necessarily.

You’re pretty young to be half planning a baby. How will you fare if you and BF split up. Is marriage important to you? Much easier to do pre-baby. So many women on here are screwed over.

If your mother has pcos it might worth investigating if you have it too

For goodness sake , not all 20 something's are incapable of monogamy!

What would be worse?
Not going to gp and never knowing if you have an issue that could be treated?
Or going to gp referring for tests and finding out?

If you are now going to actively be trying for a baby , and I mean both of you , then I’d go to the GP . My husband and I never had to try to get pregnant , we certainly never tracked anything or had sex on certain days and both times we wanted to try for a baby I was pregnant within 2/3 months . I’d also advise that before any baby appears that you get married as it does offer a level of protection for you .

this.

I wasn’t suggesting anyone was cheating.

Then what are you suggesting?

Yes, that is true.

I would advise the same to any couple deciding to have unprotected sex. Testing is vital.

I mentioned your age because you clearly were very young with a newish partner when you stated having unprotected sex. The vast majority of late teens/early 20s try to avoid getting pregnant.

That before you had unprotected sex you both should be tested. I’m not sure why anyone has taken issue with that, it’s a perfectly normal suggestion.

Because you specifically mentioned our age as one of the factors!

Funny, I’ve never seen you comment that on any of the 100’s of threads of other women who are trying to conceive?

I have replied to that. It’s nothing to do with age.

the age comment was in relation you your trying to get pregnant.

The thing is, if you don't go then you live with uncertainty. If you do go you might get less than ideal news but you might also find out there are treatments available.

I have said it many times to people having unprotected sex, perhaps not under this name but thanks for checking me out anyway.

I can see where you may be coming from in regards to that. We have been friends for many many years beforehand, and have been forced into being probably more mature than many other people our age. I was living on my own at 17, we moved in together relatively quickly after beginning dating and we both work.

Have you checked if you’re ovulating?