If you are married to an orthopaedic surgeon (not private practice), how well off do you feel as a family, if you don’t work yourself?

[Yunall]

Just wondering as DP is a surgeon (just made consultant). He doesn’t do private work and I would say we have a nice lifestyle but only because my income tops it up. I’m used to a lot of luxury and had a privileged upbringing (don’t mean to sound like a dick I’m just stating a fact) and I wonder if we had kids if I would actually have to continue working to have a decent lifestyle. Not something I talk much to DP about as he came from a less well off background and understandably I would come across ungrateful!!!

It's because all the "poor" posters on 6 figure salaries live in London and simply can't or won't envisage a life outside of the M25.

She uses partner in the post though, she doesn't say she is married or refers to him as her husband, she's asking a hypothetical question by the sounds of it.

Nonsense. I’m from the North but live in the SE. I am acutely aware of how the same salary would stretch much further in other areas. My brother’s exact house (built by a national builder) would cost three times as much in the area I live in but he would earn exactly the same as he is a teacher and there is no London weighting in my area. It means that I understand how frustrating it is for some of the single mums that I work with who earn £100k but have less than someone on a basic state pension once they have paid their mortgage, childcare and commuting costs. They are described as rich by many people (including many posters on this site) but they really are not. They are, however, fully aware of how much further their salaries would stretch in different parts of the country. But it’a not always an option due to family commitments or the availability of jobs in their field.

🤣🤣🤣 it must be a terrible struggle, I don’t know how people cope if they only earn £110k. No wonder we have food banks for poor souls like this.

My husband is a consultant surgeon who does no private work. He also has recently come off the on call rota which has reduced his salary. He values time and a full night’s sleep now he is mid 50s. Doesn’t stop him taking calls and doing paperwork till gone 10pm most evenings and ‘popping in’ to work every Saturday and Sunday to see his patients. He didn’t go into his profession to earn big; he could have earned much much more from his other talents that the NHS has benefitted from for free over the decades. Our children have both been to state schools since nursery and are now both at university. We are both from working class backgrounds and we certainly don’t live a luxurious lifestyle. Things don’t interest me. I earn half what he earns. I work because I enjoy it, it gives me satisfaction and sets a good example to my daughters. I was able to have the luxury of choice of early childcare and my choice was to stay at home for 5 years. That for me was a real luxury. So OP if you don’t want to work and live an opulent lifestyle, your partner will
have to work himself to the bone ( no pun intended) doing private work.

If people are making £100k and have less left than people on state pension they really need to have a look at their outgoings. State pension isn’t even £1000 a month and shockingly they have to pay bills out of that as well.

🤣 I do love this mumsnet demographic

Cannot believe a person could write this without a hint of irony!

The UK state pension is £997.75 per month.
Yes pensioners have to pay bills but presumably by state pension age they don’t have to pay mortgage and child care costs. Additionally they also don’t incur:
commuting costs
Prescription charges
NHS Dentist fees

Sadly, it’s clear that this thread has reached a point where it’s a race to the bottom of the barrel.

I’ve already put an example on this thread of the figures if you could be bothered to read it. £100k after tax and 5% pension is £5471. Monthly mortgage payment for a two bed terrace (less 10% deposit) is £2k, £2k for full time childcare for one child, £495 for a monthly train pass. Leaves someone with less than £1k for all other bills, food and household costs. And they don’t get free prescriptions or the winter fuel allowance!

And that also presumes that they don’t have student loan payments which would reduce their income further.

Pensioners don’t automatically get free NHS dental treatment.
Although they may qualify if they receive certain income related benefits.

What on earth am I reading?! You do realise that the majority of the nation brings up children on less than half that salary?

I'm a newish (year 3) consultant. Not ortho, but another hospital specialty, so my salary is probably similar to the OP's DH. I don't do private work, and my OH is on long term (now unpaid) sick leave, so has effectively been a SAHD for the last year. 2 primary-aged kids.

I can describe our circumstances, but there are lots of other variables that mean @Yunall 's lifestyle might look significantly different. We live in the SE, but one of the less insanely expensive areas. 4 bedroom house, on a normal new build estate, mortgaged. 2 cars, both bought outright second hand. We are comfortable but not super well off. I don't get nails/brows/Botox etc, nor spend loads on designer clothes, but if the kids need new school shoes or whatever I can afford it without thinking too much. We usually spend £5k-ish a year on holidays - DH loves skiing so tries to go each year but we don't go for big AI summer holidays - usually somewhere like Bluestone in the UK. I don't have to think about the weekly shopping bill, or if the cars need repair.

We can't afford private school for both (could maybe do one at a stretch but that wouldn't be fair). We might be able to move house into a better catchment for state secondary. We have some savings from when DH was working, but haven't been able to add significantly to that since he's been off. We have both paid off our student loans but we were on the old £1.2k tuition fees system, so younger colleagues coming through will have much more owing on that.

So we are very lucky compared with many people, and I am extremely appreciative of that. The simple fact that we have been able to absorb his not working without major restrictions is a privilege. But it is not a life of luxury! And I am very aware that we are vulnerable to me getting ill/unable to work, so need to spend a fair bit on income protection - again a privilege not available to many. If OP wants a fancy lifestyle she's going to have to do some work herself.

Any public service employment there's a grade system, ceiling limit on salary. Our local council CEO gets 250k because that's the rate for the job. There's a lot of moaning about it on social media. It's the same in the NHS. You'll never get rich without a second string to your bow.

110 is sufficient to be comfortable,not live in luxury but not worry about bills. When the kids come along your mindset will likely change, the first years of childs life wre so precious dont blow it by handing your kid over to a minder or a nursery, take note how quickly your newborn will change within days from birth, it will continue and one day you look at a teenager in front of you and think what the hell where did that time go- make memories with your kids, its only thing that matters.

You haven’t really given enough information to give a proper answer - it isn’t just what you’re bringing in but also what your outgoings are. Do you have a massive mortgage, if you have children, do you plan to send them to private school, live in an expensive area? £110k where I live would be enough to live on but a modest standard of living, I think you’re thinking more luxury?

I wouldn’t want to have to rely on my husband, I prefer my own income personally. You aren’t even married and you’re already plotting how you can give up work and be kept - presumably, you’re quite spoilt and the women in your family are traditionally “taken care of”?

Doesn’t change the fact that basic state pension is under £1k a month and they still pay bills out of that. Poor comparison when in a few years they won’t have childcare costs and will have a lot more disposable income.

Most orthopaedic consultants I know (dependant on what their specialism is) run a day a week on top of NHS doing private, tbh he might not believe in it but it provides an essential service to those who want answers quicker. Is he adult or Peadiatric?

I'm a pensioner. I have to pay NHS dental fees.

My brother is a dentist and he doesn't think he's "earning a fortune" either, but he absolutely is. Average household income is £35k. Check your privilege!

Unless they are entitled to and are claiming top up to their state pension then pensioners pay the same cost of NHS dental treatment as non pensioners.

The full rate of state pension is £230.25 a week. But this figure applies to those who reached state pension age after April 6 2016.

Those of us who reached state pension age before that date do not receive as much as this.

It’s not a poor comparison at all. In the example I have given you the person is left with less than £1000 after they have paid their mortgage, childcare and travel costs. Most pensioners are not paying mortgages or rent, childcare or travel costs. And a single parent has to feed and cloth at least two people whereas we’re talking about a pension for one person.

I’m quite aware of that thank you but you are wrong that everyone who retired before that date gets less. Some get more due to SERPS/the second state pension.

No it’s not enough to have kids on and not work. Your DH salary is good if you work too. Not enough to sustain you and kids in a nice lifestyle in a nice house and a nice area.
You will need to continue working but might get away with reducing your hours by a smallish amount. A day or so. Not much. Also why not have a conversation with your husband about what you want life to look like. He could maybe do private work as well as NHS and that might feel ok to him. It wouldn’t be a great lifestyle though if he had to work so much.

Additionally, a hygienist appointment is not included under any NHS band.

My NHS practice charges £90 for a hygienist appointment whether you are a pensioner or not. Some elderly people also need to pay for regular podiatry treatment, which again is not provided by or subsidised by the NHS.