To have screamed at DH about the eyedrops?

[ThatsABitExcessive]

Last year DH and I got sore itchy hayfever eyes. I bought some drops. A few days later DH came home and announced that we had been doing the eye drops wrong - Shiela from work had told him that rather than dropping it directly into the eye - you should drop it onto the corner of your nose and let the liquid roll into your eye. I said I disagreed with Shiela and would continue doing it properly my way.

He spent all summer doing it Sheila’s way.

Now yesterday I bought some more drops as we’re struggling again. DH said to me “don’t forget, it’s corner of the nose and let it run in”

I screamed and said that’s stupid! Just drop it into the bloody eye like a normal person!! He continues to say I’m doing it wrong and last night I had to sit and watch him dropping these bloody drops onto his face with his eyes closed!!??

The most annoying bit about it - Sheila has no medical experience. I’m an ex-qualified nurse - yet DH takes Sheila’s word as gospel!

DH is like this with his mother.

She worked as a GP receptionist, I studied medicine at university. He always takes her word over mine (even on crazy old wives tales like keeping an onion in a sock etc...) or doesn't believe me about something until she says the same thing (which she read about in an article somewhere or her friend told her about. Rather than you know the YEARS I spent studying and training in medicine) then it becomes gospel. He also goes to her first if he has any health worries he has... does my head in.

Hes good in general but the 'mummys boy' thing is probably his most annoying trait.

Leave him to it .. dont stress about a sheila let him carry on having itchy eyes .
Or maybe it might work who knows.
You do you .

So Sheila was actually correct, are you still screaming at him OP!

Oh gawd you're so in the wrong if you said "make it make sense" (and I'm off to add that on the other thread)!

But really, just say 'yes dear' and sit in another room to do your eye drops. I can't imagine getting that worked up over it.

Dear God...what is your problem...his eyes so up to him..chill out....blimey think this is you being very controlling

one, which a lot of people can relate to is where a partner is dismissive or not responsive emotionally to their wife/husband's emotional needs at home, but amazing with friends, or random women, men, listening to them helping them with their problems, being a shoulder to cry on really digging into their issues.

My ex was like that, seemed like a great friend (wasn't interested in sex either, so not doing it to get in my pants). Everyone loved him, life of the party, made a following of new friends everywhere he went. Then you start to date him and he became an aloof asshole who has time for everyone BUT you and suddenly you are the least important person in his world. We broke up, became friends again after a few years apart and he was back to being the hero that would rush out at night to help with anything etc... (once again not remotely sexual/romantic though).

Never understood it. It wasn't just me he was like that with other girls he dated too.

Shiela is either wrong, or he’s misinterpreted what she said. Eye drops go directly into the corner of your eye nearest your nose - that’s where the tear ducts are. Rolling them down your nose will pick up anything on your skin and deposit it into your eye. OP is a qualified nurse - l think she may have a better idea how it works than Shiela from work, so l can understand the frustration of watching her DH doing something she knows is wrong, and potentially harmful.

I've had eye drops put into my eye by nurses more times than I want to think about (I hate it!) and they always put it into the opposite corner to the nose. Potentially putting it straight onto your tear duct is asking for trouble.

It’s very annoying when people don’t listen to you when you know what you’re saying. I think any ex nurse would be annoyed.

But I’d let him look stupid and do it that way. If he did that in public, people would actively laugh at him.

No. Shiela misinterpreted. The advice is to put it directly into the corner of your eye nearest your nose, not put it on your nose and let it roll down.

So your husband is doing something which turns out to be a totally acceptable way, and in fact advised by many doctors.

for this, you scream at him and the mumsnet thread calls him stupid, a dick, and warns you he’s likely having an affair.

blimey

Only over really major, truly significant things…like eyedrops 😂

According to Grok: Dropping eyedrops onto the corner of your nose near the eye (nasolacrimal duct area) and letting them run into the eye is unhygienic and problematic and carries a contamination risk because the skin can harbor bacteria (e.g., Staphylococcus or Streptococcus) from nasal secretions or environmental exposure. Drops contacting this area may carry bacteria into the eye, risking infections like conjunctivitis or keratitis.

Ineffective Delivery: Eyedrops need to be applied directly to the conjunctival sac for proper absorption and effect. Running them from the nose corner dilutes the medication and reduces its efficacy, especially for treatments like glaucoma or dry eye.

Potential Irritation: Contaminants or improper application may irritate the eye’s sensitive tissues, causing discomfort, redness, or allergic reactions.

Dropper Contamination: If the dropper tip touches the skin near the nose, it can pick up oils or bacteria, contaminating the bottle and future doses.

Recommendation: Apply eyedrops directly to the lower eyelid pouch while looking up, keeping the dropper 1-2 cm away to avoid contact. Wash hands first and avoid touching the eye or surrounding skin. If application is difficult, consult a doctor for tools like eyedrop guides or training.

I then asked Grok if it would agree that your husband is an idiot for promoting this incorrect and possibly dangerous process, but it went with "I wouldn’t call someone an idiot for lecturing others to apply eyedrops by letting them run from the corner of the nose, but it’s misguided and potentially harmful. Lecturing others without medical backing is irresponsible, especially for health-related advice."

I, personally, disagree with Grok and think he's an idiot.

Also, mentionitis anyone? Is Sheila shaggable?

Why?

If you read what OP wrote, Shiela told DH to put them on his nose and let them roll across into his eye. That’s not remotely what your ophthalmologist does - they put the liquid into the corner of the eye to wash across the eye itself.

Yes. My husband needed eye drops, and the hospital told him to always apply them at the nose corners of the eyes. 🤷‍♀️

There's an episode of modern family about a Cobb salad that is essentially about this same thing.

If it's always Sheila at work he listens to, might be worth keeping an eye on that

I have this with my DH. He moans about something, I give him my thoughts/opinion/knowledge. He doesn't say much but I can tell he doesn't believe me.

Then he'll ask his DF or my DM the same thing. They tell him the same thing as I have, then he brings this news to me like his DF/my DM have solved his problem with the same solution I'd previously given him.

He does at least have the good grace to look sheepish when I say "so you believe it when one of our parents tells you, but not when I say the same thing?"

Rolling eyedrops in from your nose sounds mad! I can imagine it being good for those that just can't do their own eyedrops, but the risk of more dust/bacteria getting into your eye really doesn't sound wise!

Bloody Sheila and her powers of persuasion!

What happens if you say "Why do you believe everything Sheila says, but nothing I (the former nurse) say?"

One of the most frustrating things as a Nurse is when people come out with crap like that. My ex husband, once refused to let me redress his leg, insisted I take him to the GP as they had already dressed it and should 'fix' the problem. Made us sit there for an hour, got bored and insisted we go home. I had the dressings, the knowledge, the experience. So when we got home, after I'd had a meltdown in the car at him, I hid the dressings and told him to fuck off and he got an infection. Never been so happy. Scream away at the melt... or when you go to the local pharmacy to pick up another set of eyedrops, ask the 'pharmacist' (who we know doesn't have the time and lost patience a v long time ago) to talk him through how to apply eye drops. Next time he gets ill and wants his personal Nurse to look after him, hide all the medications and tell him to go and see Sheila. Being screamed at by his ex nurse wife should be the least of his concerns. Honestly it's disrespectful. Im probably evil 😈 xx 😀

I dint know why, but it seems that it’s very hard for people around us to actually accept we might have better knowledge than them (or other people) on certain subject.
It seems to be even worse when it’s something that is your work/you’ve studied at Uni.

And yes it’s infuriating.

Fwiw @ThatsABitExcessive i suspect your dh likes the idea BECAUSE you dint have to put the drop directly in your eye so it’s less uncomfortable. Regardless of whether it’s less efficient or carries issues.

Not quite. Doctors don’t advise putting eyedrops on your nose and letting them roll into your eye. They advise putting them in the corner of the eye, directed at the lower lid, so they can wash across the eye. Two totally different things.

If that's all it takes to make you scream then life must be a barrel of laughs in your house!

I would laugh at DH if he spouted such nonsense, let him do whatever he wanted and proceeded to apply my drops correctly. Anyway, surely there are instructions provided?

Do you also have a history of eye infections? Do you wash your nose before you apply the eyedrops?

Sheila's a pussy. Just put it in your eye Sheila, you twat.

You do you. Or possibly buy the eye products that you spray onto the eyelid. Problem solved.
But screaming at someone is poor bedside manner. Let DH do him and get on with it. Never heard of Sheila's idea. Do you have to stand on your head to make the drops run from your nose into your eye? Why?