Feel uneasy with my partner’s suggestions on splitting food/toiletries costs

[Amber991]

Hi all, I am looking for some second opinions. I moved in with my partner a few months ago. All has been going well, but recently he has started saying we should have a fairer split of our food and toiletries bill, which we usually halve.

Every time we do our main weekly shop, he now goes item by item with the receipt and splits this out. But it goes to the length of him even taking into account if I have leftovers for lunch the next day, and putting a weighting towards this so I pay more. If he thinks I’ll have an extra pack of crisps from a multi pack, he will weight that.

I have a recent stomach issue which I’m seeing my Doctor about which means I’ve been going to the loo more than usual and have been really uncomfortable. So when he went through the receipt yesterday and there was loo roll, I had to pay more on the basis I’ve been using more.

I find this really OTT! Does anyone do similar in terms of the split or do you agree it’s strange?

Dump.

if he thinks I’ll have an extra pack of crisps from a multi-pack, he will weight that

wait, what?

Do you get a credit if you then do not have the extra packet of crisps ? Thought not.

@Amber991 this is insane. As PP spotted, be glad he had shown you who he is. When he shows you this, believe him. This is who he is. Is this what you want your life to be?

run. Seriously run like the wind and don’t look back. All the best.

If this is new behaviour, talk to him. Tell him that this is ridiculous and even roommates are not this strict. What is going on? At this rate it would be easier to boy everything separate and cook everything separate. Does he want this type of relationship?

If there has been signs. Run. If he cant give proper answers or thinks this is normal. Run.

OMG I wouldn't put up with this!

YANBU

This won't get better. Do you plan to have DC together? If so, don't. This will not end well. Imagine mat leave, nursery fees etc. Just dump the guy. This is not saving/being careful with money but it's control on a different level.

If you put a lump of coal up his arse would a diamond fall out 2 weeks later?

Tell him you are unhappy with the itemisation of groceries and want to do 50:50 split.

if he refuses you have to consider if this is what you want long term. If you chose to have kids and he refused to contribute to toys/outings as they are not deemed necessary

Wow, this is madness.

I’d be moving back out again. He isn’t the one.