AIBU to think that MNers are excessively hateful towards trans people?

[Wordsmithery]

I accept that there are huge areas to be addressed when it comes to trans/non-trans rights: toilets and changing rooms, sporting events, prison accommodation, to name but a few. Government has a lot of work to do, listening to people's genuine concerns and drafting laws that protect everyone. And of course biological men masquerading as trans to prey on women are scum.
However, reading some of the many MN threads on trans people, it feels like there is a terrifying level of vitriol at the right of trans people to even exist. I emphasise, this is not about toilets/safe spaces etc. It's about Will's right to identify as Jill, or vice versa. Why does it really matter so much to us - are we scared of people being different? Are MNers failing to speak out because they're terrified of being shot down in flames? How is it hurting any of us if someone chooses to identify as their non-birth gender (beyond the caveats in my first paragraph)? What is the opinion of MNers with children or siblings or best friends who announce they are trans ?
Asking because I'm alarmed by the lack of trans allies (or even trans tolerators) on this forum. And I'm even more alarmed that there may be a reassuring number of trans allies on here but we never hear from them because they know what response they'll get.
No hate please. We seem to have enough of that already.

And what about the women and girls who literally have been harmed by transwomen in toilets and changing rooms? That doesn’t matter because it was fine for you? At the end of the day, men are men and none of them should be allowed in women’s spaces. That’s all we’re saying.

You can't separate the discussion around men who identify as 'women' from the effect that's had on women and girls rights/protections - it's been a scandal and many women are understandably furious and shocked.

If activists hadn't gone after our rights the conversation would be very different.

Vitriolic is an overused word.
Goady posts are tiresome.
Wear whatever you like, identify as you please.
If you are male:
Stay out of places that are intended as safe spaces for women.
Keep your sexual fetishes out of public spaces.
Leave children alone.
Don't threaten to rape or murder women who disagree with you.
It isn't possible to change sex so please stop insisting it is.

Qoute me ONE vitriolic post. Go on.

My point is that no one ever declares themselves to be ally to women.

However, there are clear points of contradiction when it comes to the TRAs current position.

How can you simultaneously support women's rights to single sex spaces AND support trans identifying men's desires to access women's spaces on the grounds of their 'gender identity'?

I would say the trans movement is hateful to women especially when we push back against their ridiculous ideology.

Yep. You don’t see women on here threatening to rape transpeople with baseball bats or hoping they choke on a “girldick” do you?

This is the type of comment that epitomises what OP means.
The vast majority of trans people aren't threatening anybody.
There's a trans man in my local deli, serving customers. A trans man teaches maths at our secondary school. A trans woman in the corner shop behind the counter. A trans woman has worked for many years in a play scheme nearby. They aren't activists. They aren't threatening anyone. They aren't radicalising people they come into contact with. Being trans isn't all they do or all they are.

Yes there are radical trans people and "allies" who behave threateningly on marches etc. But you can't therefore say that trans people as a whole are threatening women as a whole.

I think most people on MN are misinformed and learn about trans people from hateful online articles, I bet 99% of those people never met a trans person in their lives, the amount of misinformation (along the lines using an example of a trans person commiting a crime = ALL trans people are criminals). It's so sad how narrowminded some people are in 2025.
I know a number of trans people, not a single one wanted to rape me or kill me, not a single one wanted to make me feel unsafe. Using some extreme example off a newspaper article and screaming "TRANS PEOPLE ARE OUT TO GET US"- I really have no explanation where it comes from.
A few weeks back some user here was saying how a random parent on a whaatssap group was ridiculing girls who wanted separate toilets, neither the parent nor their child beign trans, but the poster attributed hatred towards women to trans people!

When did writing the truth become campaigning?

Tbh I see a lot more hatred towards trans people here than I have ever seen from trans communities towards anyone at all.

This.

The 'vitriol' is from the allies, not those who calmly and patiently object to men telling us they are women.

Men can wear a dress or women can grow a beard <with hormones> but you cannot change sex. It should be simple.

Check out terfisaslur.com. Literally thousands and thousands of posts from trans people and their allies threatening rape and violence. Don’t see much of that on MN, do you? Mostly just women saying no to men in their spaces, but sure.

Comparable to this?

https://terfisaslur.com

Do share some examples of what you've seen on here that's in any way equivalent.

I think calling not sufficiently anti trans people Vichy feminists or Vichy lesbians is pretty vitriolic.

Really?

You've got equivalent signs?

I used to often comment in defence but it really just seems pointless now. The transphobes are too closed minded to take on anyone else's perspective and will pile on anyone who dares defend a trans person. MN is by far the worst place for it that I have come across.

I do wonder if some people just post things to follow the crowd on here and know that posting a thread that berates the trans community will get plenty of comments agreeing with them and making them feel validated in some way. I read some of the threads and think they are surely made up.

You must be looking with your eyes closed

I think you've deeply misunderstood what's going on here. And you don't understand safeguarding.

Most people on here agree that humans can't change sex. So by what rights should 'transwomen' have access to women's spaces?

And for safeguarding purposes we keep ALL men out of women's spaces. What would be the justification for exempting this one group of men. On what grounds?

No I've never got that impression at all

It's live and let live liberalism but with the caveat that your living your best life doesn't impact mine negatively in any way

That's all

I agree with you.

I think it often is no longer about valid concerns, such as the safety of women in changing rooms/toilets and the facts that trans women should not compete in women's sport, or the right of people not to believe that people can change sex.

Rather it turns into a denial of the existence of trans people and an attack on their right to live their life as they wish in public which is not acceptable.

Trans people are a tiny minority in this country and all the vitriol thrown at them is disproportionate when most of them just want to get on with their daily lives in peace.

If we’re denying they exist then how can we also be vitriolic against them?

Actually I used to be an ally until someone close to me transitioned. It really opened my eyes to the misogyny and toxicity of trans ideology.

A quarter of my DS's friendship group have tried on a trans identity. Which opened my eyes to the horrors of puberty blockers etc.

I have lots of lovely men in my life that would not harm a soul, but if they were demanding access to female spaces these would still be no. Women have a right to privacy, dignity and safety from men where we are vulnerable and/or undressing.

Transwomen are male. All the reasons we want male free spaces apply at least equally to them as they do to any other males. The growing evidence from around the world is that they are actually greater risk to us than other males.

Why couldn't the girl have female only facilities as the Supreme Court says she should?

Yeah come back when GC women are holding up signs suggesting everyone should punch TW or that they should be decapitated or be pissed on

so bored of this attempt to both sides when only one side, the one with all the men is threatening physical violence, rape & murder