Encounter in the woods with a man...was I being silly?

[Woodwalk]

I walk in a local woods daily. Today I parked in the small car park where there were around 4 cars already. Changed into my boots, tied up my hair, no one else arrived in this time. Then I set off down a trail which begins running alongside the main road to the right, to the left is an inaccessible woodland - too dense to walk through. You can only enter the trail from the car park (at that end).

I had only been walking for around a minute or two when I got the sensation I was being watched/followed. This is strange as I would only have expected to meet someone head on on the path - given that there's one entrance and I saw no one else arrive at the car park within a minute of myself.

Anyway I turned round a few times and finally spotted a man behind me, slightly off the trail nearer to the side where the road is (trees are between the main road and me). I immediately did feel uncomfortable as I wasn't sure where he had come from, and debated stopping so that he could move ahead of me. I decided against this as didn't want to make a big thing of it.

Instead I kept going and took a turn off into a large shaded area, a clearing where I could see the original trail and find a little tree trunk to sit on (and look normal!) as he passed.

Instead of passing the man followed me into the clearing. I had walked quite far into the clearing to find a tree that gave a lot of space around me. He made a beeline for me straight towards me. I felt scared, and then he met my eyes and asked how my day was going. I immediately went into flight mode jumped up blurted out something about not wanting to be followed on my walk and started to run back to the car park (around 6 mins running). He shouted after me to come back, he didn't mean to scare me, he hadn't been following me, he was lost, he was sorry, come back please.

I just ran all the way back to the car and left.

I'm a woman in early 30s the gent was late fifties I think, and very overweight, if he tried to follow me back I couldn't tell, but don't think he could have matched my pace. He didn't have a dog, but then, neither do I.

Now I'm wondering, was he innocently lost and wanted a chat? Was I being silly to run away? It doesn't really matter now as I'm obviously safe and fine but the woods is my favourite place to go and I feel really put off returning now. Need a reality check as feel a bit silly now but in the moment I was scared.

Trust your gut, I think you were brave not silly to run - I’d probably have awkwardly answered his questions.

It was only afterwards when I was back in the safe, locked, air conditioned car that I started to really feel like I'd been over reacting and rude!

Think that's the social be nice conditioning kicking in.

I'd have been worried as it's just not normal way to behave.

I think I'd have ran as you did. Someone lost would call to you and start with a "excuse me do you know this area" or something. He might have just been absolutely socially inept but do you want to be talking to someone with no clue how interactions like that work when you are alone in the woods?

If he’s lonely or just wants a chat, going into the countryside where there are hardly any people is not really the best place.

Someone who wasn’t familiar with the area isn’t just going to randomly go for a walk in the woods.

Please report him. You’ll be devastated if you read in the news that someone was attacked there. He’s a 50- year old man lurking waiting for a lone female to turn up. You got away because you were experienced enough to call him out on it. Next time it might be some 13 year old teen getting a bit of fresh air who doesn’t have the life skills to get away.

I once reported a man who kerb crawled me and kept asking me if I wanted a lift. He stopped 3 times. On the 3rd I got out a bit of paper and very openly wrote down his car registration and make and told him I was calling the police. I did. I didn’t do it for me, but for all the women he was going to hassle after me.

Terrifying. I would have made for the road (perhaps not possible) but you, alone, with a man of any age wouldn't have stood a chance if he was a wrong un.

One time I didn't follow my instincts and a man followed me into a public toilet. He was just peeping. I shouted and he ran off. Luckily lots of people around so i asked a couple to walk me back to my car and then called the police (phone was in my car) Never laid a finger on me but taught me to always trust my gut. Always better to keep yourself safe.

At worst, you've made an innocent man aware of the impact of his actions. You are not responsible for making him feel better because he misjudged a situation.

You 100% were in the right and I hope you're OK. Could be worth a call to the non emergency police line in case it's a pattern of worrying behaviour.

I laugh at half the “LOG IT WITH THE POLICE NOW” responses on MN, but this one thread where I definitely agree

Think of it this way too, how often do you feel 'watched and uncomfortable'. That's a very rare and specific feeling.

You get it when someone's targeting you, when they are intensely focused on you for some reason. And you can bet your arse it's not a good reason..

I would call the police and tell them you were concerned about a man following you in the wood that claimed to be lost and that you think he could possibly need assistance

I had this at a cafe in a remote garden centre. I felt very strongly that the guy walking behind me was dodgy. He kept looking at me too. I got DH to come to the loos before I left!

Don’t feel silly or bad, look at it this way, far better than an awkward innocent man be offended by your behaviour than you be harmed if he was actually a predator.
You did the right thing to avoid the worst potential scenario x

When will men learn. I don’t give a toss if he was lost he should have thought about how his actions would intimidate a woman in the bloody woods.

id report tbh

In this situation.

you run like fuck

if your concerned he is genially lost. Call 111 and say what happened and that a man may or may not be lost in the woods but you wernt hanging around to find out

Please don’t feel bad. Even if it was innocent you aren’t responsible for that man’s feelings. It’s not our job to comfort men.

This we all have a gut feeling to protect us.

Regardless of his intentions he was being a dick by following you and then calling after you when you ran away.

So what if he was genuinely lost. If he’s too stupid to find his way out then it’s no great loss.

I got stopped and asked for directions today by a middle-aged man.

I got such an odd feeling from it all that I stopped trying to be helpful and friendly - actually stopped being polite - and left. Felt bad about it for a while. Then gave myself permission not to be a female service animal.

I am trying to age out of my social conditioning and allow space for my instincts: whether it's a movement in the bushes which tells you there's likely to be a leopard in there, or a random male trying to interact with you in a way that doesn't feel right, they are there for a reason.

It's never silly to be cautious and follow your instincts. He might have been innocent but some men are not and they don't have signs on their head telling us which are which! Putting "being kind" over our safety can be harmful to us.

I would also report it to the police with a description. It sounds at best that he is odd and a possible attacker. Report on the non emergency online form

Nope, he can piss right off

Similar happened to me once - I ‘felt’ the presence of someone behind me. Saw a young looking guy quite close to me so decided to stop on a bench to let him past. Then he sat on the next bench. When I started walking again, so did he! I turned round to head for home and he ran past me which gave me the fright of my life and I literally screamed at him. He said sorry I didn’t mean to scare you. I was genuinely really frightened. Hope you’re ok.

Men really don't understand this. They don't understand that we feel like this, with very good reason and that we always have to be watching out for our safety because of male violence.

You did the right thing and I would report it too. It's shit that we have to behave like this.

I read your OP and said aloud "fucking hell".
Reminds me of the case of Anita Rose, the poor woman was murdered while walking her dog, which she'd done for years along the same route. Please do report to the police, they should not think it's a waste of time.

Dodgy as fuck. Report this to the police. And as others have posted, change your routine for a while. Innocent or not (although probably not) that man now knows where he's likely to find you in a secluded spot.

Additionally, never ever be afraid of hurting someone's feelings to keep yourself safe. Us Brits are hard-wired for politeness (I'm a fucking nightmare for it) but where your gut is telling you to run, you need to run. You owe this man nothing. You don't have to respond to someone even with a polite hello if you really don't want to and if the situation feels off.

Trust your gut, ladies. Always.

If he was lost he would have shouted to you or followed his tracks back to the road. Don;t go walking in woods alone. And don't stop so he can run up to you, and engage in conversation. Its close enough to attack you.