Aware of Head Teacher and Teacher affair

[GlitterGold7]

Name changed for this. I’ve become aware that the HT of my DC’s primary school is having an affair with one of the teachers. Both are married.

Would you do anything with this information? It feels utterly morally bankrupt that the HT is abusing his position like this, and I feel so sorry for the partners involved.

I worked in a school in the early 90s, half the staff were shagging each other and it was well know by the staff and pupils.

Mind your own business!! And stop listening to, and spreading, gossip.

Unless you know them personally or it's affecting you/your children, stay out of it. What would you hope to do anyway?

If you know, and half the parents in the school know, I find it very unlikely that the spouses don't know.

You have no idea what is going on here. Keep well out.

Of course the whole thing could still be entirely innocent. But if it is an affair - perhaps the husband/wife already know. Perhaps they're in an open relationship. Perhaps they had been having an affair but had met up to end it. Anything could be the case.

But even if we accept that what you believe is true (ie it is an affair and their families and school governors don't yet know)... what on earth makes you think that you're the one who should be doing something about it?!

You have no idea what is going on here. Keep well out.

Of course the whole thing could still be entirely innocent. But if it is an affair - perhaps the husband/wife already know. Perhaps they're in an open relationship. Perhaps they had been having an affair but had met up to end it. Anything could be the case.

But even if we accept that what you believe is true (ie it is an affair and their families and school governors don't yet know)... what on earth makes you think that you're the one who should be doing something about it?!

Would you do anything with this information?

What are the options?

This was a massive deal when it happened at my school and loads of parents moved their children to different schools because of it. Just wondering why it doesn't seem to be now? Is it because affairs etc were less common in the early 1990's?

We don't know the sexes involved.

What are you thinking of doing? You either do nothing, or inform the partners somehow. If you do choose to inform the partners, go with facts (specific dates etc) as otherwise they’ll just think you’re full of it

Yes, create a big fuss and try to get them both sacked. That will benefit the school and pupils so much, as well as teaching everyone to uphold the standards of the self-appointed morality police. And you'll just feel so much better about yourself as you bask in the adulation of the other busybody parents. Make sure you let everyone know that it was you that blew the whistle...

Or I suppose you could inform the governors if you suspect that there is an abuse of power

I've never worked anywhere it's not allowed though. A very large number of people meet their partners at work.

You do nothing with that information. You cannot know all the facts of the matter and may even be wrong.

None of your business. They could all be in open marriages for all you know. Why on earth would you want to mess things up in your kids school. You will be the one who comes off badly.

Unless you're suggesting a menage a trois, mind your own business.

Unless you're suggesting a menage a trois, mind your own business.

Unless you're suggesting a menage a trois, mind your own business.

Unless you're suggesting a menage a trois, mind your own business.

None of your business.

Would be frowned upon in most workplaces but I don’t see how it’s your business, also who saw them? There could be a perfectly good explanation

So not seen by you, but by someone else? How do you know that person is not lying?

None of anyone else's business.

You don't know any of the circumstances or anything really.

I could have been spotted with female colleagues and all sorts of stories concocted. Lifts home because of broken cars, pre-trip risk assessment visits, both on the same course etc etc.

In all honesty, it's none of your business. Unless you personally saw them canoodling at the hotel, then what you know is simply heresy. I'm not saying the person who saw them isn't wrong, but for you to accuse someone, you need to have seen it yourself. A complaint made to the Governors, would result in them being spoken to, but without proof, they can deny it. I can guarantee that they aren't being so discreet at work, that other staff members aren't at least suspicious. People conducting affairs are rarely as discreet as they think, and eventually they will get found out.

Why? I don't understand this. Why move your kids? How does it affect the quality of their teaching? Surely moving schools is far more disruptive to the kids than what consenting adults do in private?