Just Snapped

[WeddingWTF]

Not sure how to word this and have obviously name changed for this.

A few months ago my husbands brother was getting married. Me and dh have been having issues for a while now mainly about his family. Anyway the day of the wedding came and dh was away helping his brother. I honestly don't know what came over me but something in me just snapped and I thought I am not going to this wedding.

I spoke to my dh and told him that I wasn't coming and even though there was tension it was fine.

Roll on to later in the evening and I had drunk a bottle of wine. Dh was ignoring my texts and blanking me. I am so ashamed to say that a red mist came over me and over 20 years of shit that I had put up with from all of them came out.

I texted each and every member of his family and told them what I thought of them and texted the bride telling her that basically she had always treated me horrible and her now dh had been shagging everything with a pulse behind her back and constantly tried it on with me on nights out. I also said that her now dh has wanted to fuck her best friend for years and always go's on about how he got with the wrong friend. Absolutely nothing I said was untrue but obviously the fall out has been nuclear and dh has now left me, his family aren't talking to me and have blocked me on everything.

On one hand I feel so ashamed at what I've done and said because there were better ways to go about things. I feel so sorry for dh and what I've done to him.

On the other hand. Honestly I have put up with so much that I just genuinely snapped.

I dunno OP. Pretty epic meltdown but I guess sometimes the only way you feel you can get out of something is to blow it to smithereens.

It's done now. Get some therapy and sort your head out. Focus on your kids and yourself.

My guess is that you have played an active part in the drama over the years … with “Shamless” style fall-outs left right and centre. Nobody, unless they love (and are comfortable with) drama, would behave in the way you did.

You got pissed, and behaved appallingly, and are now seeking to justify it.

You are pissed-off that they are ignoring you, when you would prefer some kind of public slanging match.

The only person deserving of sympathy is the child in the middle of this shit show.

I've wrote them letters of apology and it caused more flames. They said I've to have no contact with them. They have given me days and times they want to see my son and I've to send him to them then. The bride has been in the family for years and has been horrible to me for years.

I've got to wonder why dh didn't tell them not to call you names. He should have stood up for you.

OK, you snapped. But did you also fart?

I was hoping this was going to be about accidental inappropriate farting, but turns out it’s much worse. Sometimes it feels like the downfall of Jeremy Kyle has forced potential protagonists into other arenas

They just want to steer clear of you. I get it. A woman in my family ‘speaks her mind’ like you do, causes no end of trouble, then a month later she offers to help and lend a hand but no one wants to know. They are scared of her and frightened to upset her. You’ve made your bed, just accept it. You can’t do what you did and think an apology will fix it.

No farting or screaming in the Chapel in Rome either (can't remember the name)

My goodness what an absolute shitshow.
OP l can't say l am surprised dh has left you - that was not the right thing to do at all but on a wedding day is just appalling

That's nervy of them, imperiously demanding you send your son on this date or that. You don't have to send your son to them at all, but if you do agree to it should be at times which are most convenient for your son, not for them. They sound like complete assholes.

You all sounds as bad as each other. How embarrassing.

Like an episode of that God awful Jeremy Kyle show- but less classy

Maybe seek professional help as it seems that you have a lot to unpack.

Shame that the bride had her wedding day ruined as that is going to stay with her forever.

DH has never once stood up for me or my son. Everything has always been turned into my fault.

Also I've never caused drama in my life. This is the first time. I am a mum, nurse, wife just getting through life with working paying bills etc.

Tell them all to fuck off, they wanted him dead didn't they? Well sod them, he isn't a toy and they have no say or power over you now.

Then it might be best if he does leave as it sounds like he values his family more than he does his wife. I think it's him you were really the most angry at, but you took it out on everyone. That's liable to happen again if you stay with a man who doesn't have your back.

They've said via dh if I don't send him then I will be taken to court for access.

I’m aghast that we have nurses working within our NHS with such terrible judgement. Do you have a problem with alcohol?

@heroinechic i bet she’s a mental health nurse. Sadly it attracts these types. Not all, but many.

nope

I would suspect it's a bullshit empty threat used to control you.

I'd make them take me to court for access. I expect they'd only work on turning your son against you.

Agree. They probably would try parental alienation.

They have a lot more money than me. That's what's scaring me about court.

Over the years they have told my son that I am not a good mum because I buy stuff second hand, work, can't make sports days etc. Oh and because I wasn't married when I had him.

I have no words. Talk about a rod for your back, you stepped in it big time.