Boyfriend doesn’t want me to wear makeup “hates it”

[itsprobablyjustaphrase]

My boyfriend of 2 years has started making comments about me wearing makeup. I’ve never worn a lot of makeup, just some concealer, mascara and fill my brows in. Sometimes, if we’re going out I will put more makeup on, maybe some blush or eyeliner but it never takes me more than 5 minutes! It’s not a lot at all. I have nothing against people who like to do their makeup, I think it looks lovely on people, I just don’t have the skill or patience to do it.

Since Christmas he has been saying:

“You don’t need makeup”
“I prefer you without makeup”
“Your foundation doesn’t match your skin tone, look at this line”
“Why are you putting make up on you’re going the shop!”
“Why are you painting your face?”
“You don’t need all that”
“I hate it when you wear lipstick”
“Your lipstick is wonky”
“you don’t need all that on your face”

I wear makeup because I don’t like my bare face, it does feel like a security blanket to have some mascara on to open up my eyes a bit. I’ve always worn it, with or without a boyfriend.

Part of me thinks he’s doing it to be nice, but the other half thinks he’s being nasty?

I don’t know why this has suddenly become an issue. But it’s making me feel a bit down.

Aibu to think it’s quite mean?

He is an insecure controlling little prick op and you don't deserve this treatment.
He should be treasuring you and helping you be confident not nit picking every tiny thing about you.
I would tell him to find a gf that doesn't wear make up and who cooks things the way he likes because you are you and are perfectly fine as you are... he is the one with a problem.

OP he sounds horrible and what right does he have to dictate whether or not you wear make up?? It literally has nothing to do with him.

Dump him, you can do so much better.

So you've answered your own question, which was "Aibu to think it’s quite mean?"

The other question is what are you going to do about it?

Tell him you’ll wear what you like, and it’s nothing whatsoever to do with him, and don’t entertain any further comments.

Girl, you’re not the problem here. He is. “I am sensitive though and he’s said before I can’t take criticism” …. Roughly translates to “I’m going to speak out of turn and put you down and if you react in any way shape or form then I’ll tell you YOU’RE the sensitive one and it’s a YOU a problem.”
I’m sorry but I can see the red flags from here…

i am sensitive though and he’s said before I can’t take criticism.

Just out of interest how is he at taking criticism?

How can you bear cooking for the ignorant pig?

Tell him to fuck off to his house.

He's a controlling twat. It's not that you can't take criticism, it's that you won't put up and shut up when he's trying to control what you wear, or say, or do.

Run. Far, far away.

Wow, fuck him.

You're not sensitive. You're with a control freak who is negging your makeup and clothing and cooking. He's trying to make you feel lesser because he's insecure.

The next time he tells you how to cook a dish you're cooking, he gets to cook. Leave the pan on the stove and tell him to go for it. Don't cook for him again.

I wouldn't stay with him myself. I can't stand insecure controlling men and they never improve.

Oh OP, wtf, he’s an arsehole.

You’re not ‘sensitive’ - you’re recoiling naturally to someone being critical and controlling. It’s a natural response to inappropriate behaviour and disrespect.

Respect yourself, and end it with him.

Now you're second guessing yourself be of mr.hypercritical if you stop the makeup to appease him give it a wee while and it'll be something else.
Walking on eggshells to appease is no way to live.

He’s super controlling and doesn’t want anyone else to find you attractive.
Run.

when I’m cooking he’ll tell me what to do, what to add etc. even though he’ll never cook.

Tell him to STFU unless he’s going to do the cooking.

Why are you listening to this arsehole? He sounds incredibly controlling and you appear to be letting him control you. He already has you doubting yourself. Red flags big time.

i am sensitive though and he’s said before I can’t take criticism.
@itsprobablyjustaphrase

If course he's going to say that so he can keep criticising you!

He's training you to just accept his abuse and blame you for feeling crap about it.

You can wear as much or as little makeup as you want.

Just seen this. In the kindest possible way, your partner is a nagging controlling arsehole. I think you know what you need to do.

He's getting the bunting in place @itsprobablyjustaphrase.

He isn't going to turn into a Prince. He's a nasty croaky frog. Throw him back and go and have some fun and fund someone who appreciates you for the fab person you are.

I bet he's stingy in bed too

Control starts slowly.

He's 'training you' to accept his right to say what he wants to you. Once that's done he'll start training you to accept his right to tell you what to wear. From there he'll start in on where you go, and who you associate with. All, of course, 'for your own good'.

Run for the hills. This isn't something that can be 'discussed' with him to make him see what he's doing with the hope of him 'fixing himself'. This is who he is.

I had a friend that kept using an orange base foundation and constantly told her it didn’t match her skin tone, she looked like a pumpkin but doesn’t listen and still looks like a pumpkin. Maybe have a makeup consultation at a good boutique or expensive venue and just see what they recommend. You also might 100’s times better without makeup and you just don’t see it in yourself. Maybe he thinks look gorgeous natural but it’s all what you want, not him so do what you want, not what what he wants and that makes you comfortable. I always put on a light foundation when going out to get small things taken care of. I don’t like my face bare but in my younger days I did.

I posted from the first page oh he just gets worse, cooking, sensitive, clothing.op this guy is abusive ditch him at the earliest opportunity.

Break up OP.

He sounds absolutely horrible. You do not deserve to be treated in this way. Don’t try to talk to him about it. This is who he is and he will not change. You can only control your response and the best way is to get out

i am rubbish at sticking up for myself, and sometimes I just think maybe I should grow up about getting upset about stuff.

like hell criticise me for the most pointless of things - even how to cut a sandwich, or will re/do something I’ve just done even if it’s “right” - like if I put the microwave on for 2.5 mins he’ll say “that’s meant to be on for 2.5 mins” go over, check, turn off the microwave and turn it back on to 2.5 mins!

other stuff like when I’m cooking and I leave the room he’ll turn the heat down on the pan, or start stirring! It drives me mad

Why are you tolerating any of this? What for?

I had a boyfriend when I was young who started suggesting that I buy my clothes from specific shops. I told him to f&ck off and ended up dumping him not long after when I realised what a d&ck he was.

Ok so your updates put a different spin on it

He’s a controlling arsehole who enjoys criticising you. You deserve someone who lifts you up.

Just end the relationship. He's shown you who and what he is, everyone here is telling you who and what he is. If you continue on with this nonsense then it's your own fault. Take some control of your own life.