Would this have offended you? DP comment in shop

[Heath78]

DP and I were doing a shop yesterday afternoon and walked down an aisle where we passed a woman who was picking something up for her child. She was in these sort of tight fitting trousers which were very flattering for her admittedly lovely backside.

When we passed and were out of earshot, DP turned to me and asked if I could buy trousers like that. I asked if he knew what the style was called and he said he didn’t , but he ‘just liked the view’.

He knows I am slightly self conscious with my weight, and wouldn’t wear anything really tight.

I suppose what I’m asking is, I think he wasn’t making an observation at her fashion choice, but was being sleazy about her appearance and made me feel bad in the process. Would you have been offended at this too?

No, no it isn't.

How was he disrespectful?

I feel a bit sorry for the woman trying to go about her day and having you and your boyfriend looking at, and discussing her body.

Why?
She is none the wiser.

Women treated as sex objects, to be rated on how a male views them. It's depressing, and impacts every one of us, from childhood.

I am unsure of how a man thinking his wife who he finds sexually attractive would look good in a certain style of clothing is treating women as a sex object.
Am I treating men like a sex object when I pointed out to DP that the suit a guy was wearing at a recent wedding would look good on him?

So when you choose clothes, do you never consider how they look on you, how others may think they look on you? Or do you honestly not give a damn about how you look? If so, you're absolutely in the minority. Thinking that an item of clothing looks good on someone else isn't treating them as ‘sex objects’ 😂

Your DP wasn’t being sleazy.. You noticed her ass too OP 😂
We all look at other people we find attractive, everyone does it & it’s normal , it’s not like he was passing off lewd comments, infact he basically said, you’d look good in those , will you buy a pair 🤷🏻‍♀️…
I don’t see anything wrong with that …..

The trousers showed off her bum. He thought you would also suit those trousers ie have a nice bum. Even if you dont agree or are self conscious, your dh finds you attractive and commented on it. I wouldn't be offended.

Yep.

You noticed her bottom too, op.
It sounds like your dh was having a joke with you and thinks your bottom would also look nice in the same trousers. Don’t overthink this.

Oh come off it! It wasn’t the style of trousers he was admiring was it?! Most men I’ve been with wouldn’t notice what any woman is wearing - do your husbands honestly have strong opinions on whether you’re wearing capri pants or palazzo pants?!

Most of them don’t notice if you’ve had a haircut, whether you’ve bought something new, if you were wearing pink or red. Women’s fashion is not generally something straight men give a shit about.

He was checking out her arse not her trousers.

He should have kept it to himself not drawn attention to it by suggesting OP buy the same outfit so he could check out hers instead.

No, wouldn't have batted an eyelid.

I had comments like that from my husband, looking at a dryrobe to a pair of leggings and sports bras - "you should buy that" is not sleazy in my books.

I would find it very offensive if the person who was wearing whatever item was looking absolutely dreadful wearing them! If they look great? it's a compliment.

you know many of us look at men's bum too don't you? 😂

Most of them don’t notice if you’ve had a haircut, whether you’ve bought something new, if you were wearing pink or red. Women’s fashion is not generally something straight men give a shit about.

Sorry you have been surrounded by shit men.

My DP notices all of these things why wouldn't he, we live together.

Just sounds awkward

Are you normally so easily offended, for goodness sake, its a pair of trousers.

Your husband is suggesting you'd look good in something, take it as it was intended and stop being so bloomin offended!

I think if it's not the type of interaction you normally have with your husband then you're not being unreasonable and he was thoughtless.

Yet women can't look at men and appreciate them

We were at a opening of a garden yesterday at work ( to take patients to ) the man walked in linen trousers, shirt slightly undone, sunglasses, tanned, myself, my colleague and the patient all looked, saw him, looked at each other and all said something along the lines of yes please!

Very simply, I'd have taken it as my husband thinks I'd look nice in those, he thinks my body is nice (even if different to hers) and I'd take it as the compliment he probably meant it as. But only you know your husband, wether he makes you feel good about yourself or compares you unfavorably to other women? That should answer wether you're offended or not

I think you are overthinking this. He saw this woman and though 'her bum looks nice in those trousers... I'd really love to see my wife's bum in them instead'.

I buy clothing that while I wouldn't wear it out of the house, gets my husband excited to see me in it as it shows off my body in a sexy way. He's just pointed out a particular style of clothing he thought would look great on you and your bum.

My husband has thoughts in his head that I don't know about: not offended

My husband tells me he wants me to dress like another woman (that I have nothing physically in common with), sending me the clear message that I am not what he really wants: offended + suspension of all access to my clearly substandard body

If I saw a guy with a massive cock wearing tight trousers I would 100% say to my husband “do you think they have those trousers in your size?” & he would piss himself laughing because we’re not uptight lunatics.

In true mn style the 1st post nails it !

This.