Neighbours - report or just grit my teeth?

[pinkandpurpleflowers2025]

TLDR: AIBU to grit my teeth even though it's eating me alive?

I moved into my dream home in January. I saved YEARS for this house, sacrificed everything to get it. I adore the house and can see myself living here forever. It's a new build so I'm putting my mark on it and making it my own

It's a brand new estate and while I was the first owner to move in, the 2 Housing Association houses on my road moved in just before Christmas. One family are amazing, we've been back and forth to each other's houses, they've been so kind and generous and helped me loads when I first moved in

The other house, unfortunately they're so difficult. I specifically chose my plot because it was the end of a T junction, only neighbours on one side, nobody to the other side or across the road. My property boundary covers right down my drive and across to the fence on the other side of the road. I am the only property with a front lawn, extending down the side of my drive and right across the cul-de-sac

Since the day I moved in, THOSE neighbours have used the end of my drive as their own personal parking. It's not a public road, and they have a double driveway AND space for a third car to park across their own drive but they and their (multiples times a day) visitors park on my property. They also randomly use other people's driveways which baffles me. Just park anywhere they want. So much entitement. The day the neighbours inbetween us both moved in they arrived to meet the estate agents to collect their keys only to find neighbour's mother parked in their drive. When I did mention how they couldn't park across my drive the mother shrugged and said that is "how it's done around here". THEY MOVED IN 6 WEEKS BEFORE ME!!!!

Their kids use my drive exclusively for their play. I'm not mean, I have kids myself, but their kids will turn my front garden into their football pitch. They're using my plants as their goal posts and have killed off everything I have planted. They ride their bikes on my drive around my car. They leave their bikes on my property for hours, and I'm having to clear 5 or 6 bikes anytime I need to get in my car.They kick their football into my car. I have been out there multiple times telling their kids to mind my fence and plants, reminding them it's MY property and that I don't want damage. The teenagers CLIMB on my fences. And then once I got my Ring doorbell set up I realised that they were letting their dog out to toilet in my front garden because they don't have one (they do have a back garden but dog apparently isn't allowed to use that...)

When I saw the dog out there I immediately went out and asked them to not do that, and the mother went crazy at me, telling me she was watching her dog. I have dogs, but I would never let my dogs out with the sole purpose of using someone else's front garden to have a poo.

Another day I saw the 14 year old son hanging off my fence, again went straight out and told him to get down, told him that he was going to get hurt but that he was also damaging my property. He apologised but has continued to do it daily. I don't have the money to replace or repair 15-20' of fence because he's damaged it.

I'm so worn down. After her behaviour over the dog I don't feel comfortable approaching her anymore. I'm mortgaged and as they're HA I reckon they'll be there for the long haul, and not that I want people to be evicted but that wouldn't even be an option by the sound of it which would make for an extended period of awkwardness.

I keep trying to tell myself to just leave it be, even if it means my property is getting damaged or my partner and I cannot both park on our drive because of their guests parking. If my immediate neighbours don't have both cars on their drive we can get in/out by using their drive (not that we should have to) but when both are home we are blocked in/out and with our jobs we are in and out at all kinds of hours of the day and night. Their visitors are very often there overnight. There hasn't been a single day since I moved in where one of their visitors or themselves haven't parked on my property

But I'm so fed up. What do I do?! How can I make myself just not let this get to me? Or do I report them to the HA? I've moved from a very quiet street where everyone kept entirely to themselves to this and while I love the house I am letting this let to me more than I probably should and it's spoiling what should be such a happy time in life in whatI thought would be my forever home.

I know how much you all love a diagram so attached. The other side of the T junction is exactly the same as my side with private land. And I make a BIG point when my kids are out there playing with the neighbours kids of telling them not to stray onto property that isn't theirs, but their kids freely cycle around the other neighbours [eyewatering expensive] cars and also climb on their fences. Tonight they were all playing hide and seek and letting themselves into any unlocked gardens to hide...

I'm just so torn between keeping peace, turning off the Ring notifications and suffering for the sake of my beautiful home, or speaking up (I'm autistic and dont always articulate well to others) and making things a nightmare for years to come

I have no plans to move.

Before you spend money on fencing or gates, double-check for any restrictive covenants included in your purchase documents. Developers often put these in and it might mean you have to keep your garden as lawn with no fencing or hedges for example.

If that's not an issue, I'd go for some very prickly pyracantha hedging to deter the kids and dog as a start.

My daughter just moved into a HA property. And in her tenancy there is a huge section on anti social behaviour and how it isn’t tolerated and how you would break your contract if you behave in such a way.

My advice is park your car in the visitors bay if it belongs to you and leave it there. Put cameras up. Put. fences or large pots out. If you catch the kids breaking anything the cameras will catch it then it should become a police matter.

If they block you IN, then you can call the police to get them towed. The police, DVLA & the council are organisations that can lawfully arrange towing in the UK.

Do these Cheeky Fuckers know that bit of road is yours? If so, I'd report them to HA every single time. I'd also do the fence option on your boundary, your neighbours will just have to get used to reverse parking. But I would have a word with the nice neighbours and explain that you've had to resort to this. You could get bollards, but that won't stop the children coming onto your property with bikes etc.

You need to push back with fuckers like these, report them every time they they trespass on your property.

Report to the HA. They will try to write it off as Anti Social behaviour, so you need to be clear that they are making you anxious, spoiling your enjoyment of your home, trespassing on your property. Aggressive behaviour - get a crime reference and report it to the HA. Their behaviour is a tenancy breach but the HA won't want to report it as that so you will need to report every little thing until they get sick of it and take steps to evict them.

Don't expect them to keep you updated as your obnoxious neighbours have a right to privacy. I work for a HA, so I am afraid you will need to keep on top of this before anytuhing is done.

So I think I'm right in believing that you park your car on your drive, and then they pull in behind actually blocking you in?

If so, then in your shoes OP, I would see if I could buy a cheap old banger, park it where you normally park, and then when the neighbours block you in, reverse into their car HARD! Then do it again, you just say, 'Oh dear, I tried to get out without having to disturb you, but my foot slipped, and I went a bit too fast, so sorry'.

Of course as you're clearly not as nasty as me, (I've had experience of really scummy neighbours in the past), you won't do it, lol. So failing this, I would suggest that you speak to a solicitor, and ask them to send a 'Cease & Desist' letter. Google it if you don't know what it is.

I think you need to separate out the differnt issues and what annoys you the most.

I wouldn’t tolerate the actual or risk of damage to my property- the fence, football on the car, the dog poo etc and I would pop a note through the door about that saying I’ve observed these in the last week, knock it off or I’m going the HA or other routes. If there’s poo on your lawn chances are there’ll be on others too and there’s strength in numbers then they don’t retaliate against just you.

The parking would irritate but I wouldn’t see the harm tbh (unless I’m missing something). That said I am used to shared spaces with on street parking only so used to not having designated spots and making do. If the high number of visitors are related to a business, perhaps they are in breach of their rent too and running something commercial?

As pp have said, this ideally would have been dealt with as soon as it happened. Some of the issues are police matters. I would speak to your other neighbours and explain you've had enough and are going to take action, and you hope you can count on their support.
Get your cameras sorted inc bodycam. Then go round, ask for a word, and say, You know how I've asked before not to block me in, climb on my fence, bang my car etc? Well tbh I've just had enough now and I'm going to have to do whatever I have to do to stop it. Hope you can u derstand that as I've saved up and bought a garden etx, I'd like to use it myself.

This is YOUR ASSET that you scrimped for. You need to protect it. If you had to put it on the market for some reason if your circumstances changed, it would be devalued due to this. The longer it goes on the more they can claim it's always been allowed. Kill it off!!

Definitely report them. Many years ago a few of my neighbours complained about a private renter and they were evicted
nip things in bud, put a camera up if you can

the builders wont give a toss about boundaroes you0 need to complain to the ha

it will take time but make a diary and note everything and keep your vidoes

Report them to the HA, they’ll have signed up to some sort of code of conduct to be given the property which they need to be reminded of.

Get a fence up. Your neighbours can reverse. Also report them to the HA

Sorry, haven't RTFT. However, my mum worked in housing for years, both for Local Authorities and Housing Associations, and specialised in ASB. You need to:

1. Contact the HA to let them know there's an issue with their tenants
2. Keep a diary of all the ASB, with times and dates, take videos and photos as much as you can to back yourself up
3. Inform the police of all the ASB and any threats made to you
4. Sound out any other neighbours who are also dealing with their ASB to see if they would be willing to make a complaint and keep a diary

People who are continually causing ASB can and will get evicted but the HA needs enough evidence to convince a judge that it is bad enough.

Of course report, you'd be mad not to!

You are kind of lucky they are not home-owners, it would be a lot more difficult to resolve anything. They have a landlord, I would have reported from week 1!

Why is is always the victims of these bullies who are worried about bad relationships? They have ruined any kind of neighbourly "friendship" already.

Can you write on the road - NO PARKING - PRIVATE PROPERTY and a sign saying ''Vehicles will be Clamped''? There used to be private clampers who would do this sort of thing. The offending parker then has to pay fine to clamper and call them to remove clamp - nothing to do with you. You either have private property or you don't.

HA houses are sprinkled throughout new build estates; the aim is to hope their behaviour improves by living amongst decent people. Most HA residents are perfectly fine but some are not. When buying best to find out which are the HA houses and avoid them.

Wow I got stressed just reading this. Report them.

Could you install those bollards that sink into the ground or can be removed with a key? You and nice neighbours could both have keys. A hassle but perhaps better than the current situation.

Could you park your own car where their visitors park thus not affording them a space to park there?

Put moveable posts to block off your driveway. Give nice neighbours a key. Also plenty of signs saying Private NO Parking. And cctv on the drive.

Record everything they do in writing and take pictures of them trespassing on your property. Report them to their housing association. Years ago, HAs had powers to issue ASBOs. I don't know if that's still the case, but they no doubt do have powers over their tenants who are breaching their lease terms, which will probably/hopefully include their conduct towards neighbours. Explore getting fencing/hedging/bollards and prominent CCTV and signage warning that your garden is private property.

Are the developers still there? They won’t want a lot of talk about difficult tenants driving down the value of the houses. Talk to them. Ask for advice. Reluctantly mention going on social media to see whether anyone can advise you… They are likely to support you in dealing with the HA. And definitely report repeatedly to the HA.

And get creative. Get a sprinkler on your front lawn that catches the whole area.
And fog horn to blast anyone misbehaving 😅
Use the pot plants and park strategically with your neighbours.
Plant pyracantha.

And if she lets her dog foul your lawn again use loud angry words to make it clear you do not tolerate dog shit on the lawn you mow.

I’d shovel up the dog poo and leave it outside their house.

Report report report. Dont be scared that they may escalate, if they do report to police. They've shown themselves to be antisocial and at worse bullies, kindly just ignorant of other people. They won't magically get it or miraculously change. Just accept you won't be cordial neighbours but you won't be plagued by their rudeness too if you report them.

My sister had a similar issue re owing the road outside her house and the neigh our opposite parking on it so she couldn't get out of her drive, this person also had loads of other antisocial couldn't give a shit behaviours, she hated living there and communication broke down completely. Gotto nip in bud if you can by reporting or have to accept it, which isn't fair sadly.

Could you make your side garden part
of your back garden and fence it off?
Or chuckles making it less attractive as a play area?

I think I would put up one of those bollards that can move up and down to stop them doing it. Then give nice NDNs a key/clicker so they can get their cars out no problem. Something like this https://bollardsecurity.co.uk/product/echo-rise-wireless-battery-powered-automatic-bollard/ Then I would be calling the police for trespassing on your private property/criminal damage where you feel it is warranted or if it gets to a point where you can't cope any more. Sure it is minor but if you record it and prove over time they repeatedly trespassed despite signage then hopefully someone would do something 😐

I definitely wouldn't just put up with it, the longer you let it go on the more they will say 'but we've all let each other use each other's properties for XXX - why change now?'