To think this is immature ?

[HockeyMum1996]

My sister’s 17 year son has just dropped out of an A Level course and he has a full time job atm.

Both my sis and my BIL are very well educated, upper middle class professionals- both did A levels, went to uni, worked hard and have now both got senior roles.

My sister clearly isn’t happy that her son left school, and when I went round her house for Sunday Lunch she’d had a few drinks and said in an angry, drunken voice that one of the ladies at church who has a son in the same school year as my nephew, said “I’m sorry for what’s happened” - ie my nephew leaving school. She went on to criticise nephew’s character saying he “couldn’t stick at anything and is hopeless”

my nephew could hear all this and was in the next room.

truth is, my nephew hated school and is much happier in work

AIBU to that sister’s being unreasonable?

my nephew dropped out of A levels - but I feel my sister can’t just scold him because of what another woman said in church ?

my sister has form for being immature abd a bit intolerant of differences

Sure because that’s how you’d respond if you actually cared about someone

and indeed their child

He hasn't dropped out of school. He's opted not to do A Levels.

Wait til your 61 ….. 😁 (and wake up at 2 bloody am and can’t get back to sleep)

I’d rather my child be happy. I’ve seen and heard what pressuring young people to become what their parents want does to a child and personally I’d rather them be here and happy than the dreaded worst case alternative. I didn’t graduate until I was 30. There’s nothing wrong with taking some time to figure out what you want to do. Poor kid! You are definitely NOT being UR. I’d be having words with my sister if I was you. Please make sure your nephew is ok.

“I’m sorry for what happened” as if he’s in prison for murder or something lol he’s dropped out of college ffs 🤦🏼‍♀️

Lol insomnia is my regular visitor. Takes me ages to drop off and still start waking about 4 am ( usually my bladder wakes me) and never really get decent sleep after that

@Cherrytree86 you might want to read the rest of the thread, specifically OP's posts. OP's nephew has giving his mother's drinking as his reason for leaving school. OP has mentioned her sister's drink problem several times.

MN has a facility whereby you can read all of the OP's posts, which is handy if you can't be bothered to read the whole thread, but fancy having a pop at another poster.

😂 I think you need to step away from YouTube.

Well this is exactly what I thought. - and to be honest because of the exact point you made and my personal knowledge of the supposed woman in question - Christine (yes actual name) - I can’t imagine her saying such a thing. Christine is very down to earth, realistic, not at all pearl clutchy or precious

@LJShaw I think you should start your own thread with all your "end is nigh" malarkey, rather than hi-jacking this one. You could put it in Chat, or maybe the Preppers area.

I’ve known a person have quite a major breakdown because of parental academic and social pressure - not suicidal thankfully but major depression when before this the person had 0 psychiatric history

That’s so sad but I can believe it! Imagine how much of a failure and disappointment you would feel it’s heartbreaking 💔

I have a sister with a drink problem, I care for her but I rarely see her despite her living a 3 minute walk away. There comes a point when being somebody's emotional/verbal "whipping boy" takes it's toll and stepping back is the best thing to preserve your own mental wellbeing.

He's 17 and earning a wage. No doubt he contributes to the household(his contribution probably also helps to fund his mother's drinking habit) not sure why she's pissed off that he's not in school or college. He's not a baby. Further education isn't for everyone. It's ideal for training opportunities but it's not the end of the world. It's not like he's sat around the house all day doing fuckall. His mum needs to lay off him

YANBU - sister sounds vile.

Good on your nephew who is choosing his own life. If he wants - he can always go back into education later in his life.

Mumsnet is full of people who are ‘apparently’ earning £100k, which is never much or enough for their lifestyle! Very snobby

I think she is unreasonable to outwardly be upset, of course inwardly it's a blow to her, but it's her son's choice. One of our DS dropped out. We didn't try to change his mind, and actually he's done really well in his chosen job. I think ppl need to support their kids in their chosen path rather than try to stamp their own expectations and life choices on them.

And if she had a child that you were very concerned about… you’d still only very rarely see her?

OP you’ve offered your nephew to stay with you, and it would seem it hasn’t accepted the offer. You very rarely see your sister so that means you very rarely see how she behaves with her son normally.

But op keeps repeating that he WASNT high flying - that’s the difference !!!

That post was two days ago!

Surely you can cluck " see all " on ops posts to keep up.

“from the perspective of a very high-achieving teen dd…”

So this is what you’ve actually come here to tell us.

@HockeyMum1996

What kind of job is he doing, OP?

Office work

Op you’ve offered your nephew a place to stay… he declined?