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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

2nd Date, he embarrassed me in a restaurant

239 replies

RTooDeeTo · 30/05/2025 19:42

Am I over reacting here? I suspect I might be.

1st date went well, 2nd date today. We went for for late/early dinner. nice restaurant. We got talking about Austria, Switzerland etc and he said “I can yodel”. I just laughed so he said “I can show you?” So I laughed again and said “in the middle of a restaurant?”

He then started yodelling loudly. I swear everyone turned around and looked at us. I’m normally pretty passive and would usually just quietly die inside but on this occasion I was beyond embarrassed, absolutely mortified and snapped “Shush!”

He laughed and said “what?” So I said “seriously? We’re in the middle of a restaurant”. He said sorry (whilst still laughing) and tried to change the subject but I couldn’t get past it. Who does that?

I don’t like being centre of attention and yes I embarrass easy. I ended up going home early as I just couldn’t stop thinking about it. He’s messaged me since asking if everything is ok, I don’t think he’s actually associating my change in mood to the yodelling incident!! Making me think maybe I’m over reacting??

OP posts:
NooNakedJacuzziness · 31/05/2025 18:27

When he finished I hope one of the other diners said "I'll have what he's having"

Bandit24 · 31/05/2025 18:44

Really doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks. You didn’t like it and you mentioned it. He dismissed your concerns on a second date! That’s important and if you absolutely can’t take that then you can’t. It’s perfectly reasonable to walk away

GiveDogBone · 31/05/2025 18:54

Sounds like he is an extrovert and you are an introvert. Not the ideal combination.

pollymere · 31/05/2025 18:58

You should have said "maybe later" rather than "what, here in the restaurant?" He may just like fooling around and is less inhibited. It wouldn't be a deal breaker for me. I have a friend like this and you just have to step in and say something when it pushes outside of your comfort zone. He's an amazing, generous friend so the minor embarrassment is worth it!

PlainJaneBrain · 31/05/2025 19:19

Give him another chance, take him out and give him your best whale call impression!😶

CoraPirbright · 31/05/2025 19:24

Tell him you were utterly mortified by his preposterous antics in a public place and see what he says. I am an extrovert but am keenly aware of others comfort and have standards, damn it, so his answer will tell you all you need to know. If he is staggered and non-plussed by your reaction, throw him back into the sea. If, however, he was just trying to impress and got it v wrong, it might be worth a second look.

Bleachedlevis · 31/05/2025 19:54

ilovesooty · 30/05/2025 21:49

What would you have done? Climbed out of the toilet window or something?

Show quote history

Yes, of course she’d have climbed through the bathroom window isn’t that what everyone does? 🤪

BrickBiscuit · 31/05/2025 19:58

CoraPirbright · 31/05/2025 19:24

Tell him you were utterly mortified by his preposterous antics in a public place and see what he says. I am an extrovert but am keenly aware of others comfort and have standards, damn it, so his answer will tell you all you need to know. If he is staggered and non-plussed by your reaction, throw him back into the sea. If, however, he was just trying to impress and got it v wrong, it might be worth a second look.

No, definitely not worth a second look. When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

asrl78 · 31/05/2025 20:17

He is not from SE England is he, where in my experience situational awareness is dreadful?

Dawnb19 · 31/05/2025 20:23

He seems like fun. It's good to lighten up sometimes. It could have also been the nerves.

BunnyLake · 31/05/2025 20:58

If I had liked him up until then I’d give him a second chance but with the condition of no more yodelling. If he went on to something else equally cringe then I’d knock it on the head. You need someone you can take places without worrying they'll show you up.

ImGoneUnderground · 31/05/2025 22:01

Was it impressive yodelling? Or like a yak caught in too tight jeans? If impressive, then maybe take it in good fun, it may be his 'party piece' to try & impress you if you were talking about 'yodelling places' anyway - if it gave you the Ick, then maybe be just be a good friend with a 'Sound Of Music' obsession? (did anyone else in the restaurant really care??).🤔Or take him outside next time (if there is a next time) & go round with a collecting hat? (or, does he come from somewhere that yodelling is a mating call??). However, he did ask first, laugh & say sorry afterwards though.....I would go on a 3rd date & see what happens, just for the heck of it...you may look back in 20 years & laugh together - or you may 'delete & block' - just out of interest - where did you meet him?

pineapplesundae · 31/05/2025 22:56

This is the way.

whackamole666 · 31/05/2025 23:07

Hmmm ...... You're not compatible.

Anna1mac · 01/06/2025 00:31

Ach, who cares. Actually, nobody. So there's your answer. Get over it. Maybe date somebody from the church, who wears starched shirts and corduroy trousers.

nomas · 01/06/2025 00:36

Anna1mac · 01/06/2025 00:31

Ach, who cares. Actually, nobody. So there's your answer. Get over it. Maybe date somebody from the church, who wears starched shirts and corduroy trousers.

When’s the last time you had a date where they yodelled in a restaurant?

Evilspiritgin · 01/06/2025 00:43

lightslittle · 30/05/2025 20:17

I think it’s an overreaction.

I would flip in round - he didn’t embarrass you, you felt embarrassed by something he did. Might mean you’re not compatible and that’s fine.

I would be irritated he had disturbed other diners, as I think that’s a bit rude but also I like it when someone doesn’t care what people think about them!

Add the fact she more or less gave him the go ahead,

she laughed then he said I can show you, then she said in the restaurant!!!

what did she expect to happen,

nomas · 01/06/2025 01:11

Evilspiritgin · 01/06/2025 00:43

Add the fact she more or less gave him the go ahead,

she laughed then he said I can show you, then she said in the restaurant!!!

what did she expect to happen,

Show quote history

She didn’t give him the go ahead, how ridiculous. She would have thought he was joking, like
most people. She barely knows this man, how was she to know he would actually yodel when he said he would.

JMSA · 01/06/2025 02:15

This thread has given me the giggles even though I’d be mortified 😄

StuckUpPrincess · 01/06/2025 02:34

PlainJaneBrain · 31/05/2025 19:19

Give him another chance, take him out and give him your best whale call impression!😶

LMAO! That's a v. funny reply!

JHound · 01/06/2025 02:50

He would never see me again.

Blackkittenfluff · 01/06/2025 03:20

I'd block and delete.

If he's like that in public, what on earth is he like in private?
Doesn't mind embarrassing you either.

Some people shouldn't be allowed outside.

Londonwriter · 01/06/2025 03:21

You're not compatible...

I'd be in hysterics, personally. If I were single right now, I'd be asking for this man's phone number.

It's not your thing, evidently, OP and, thus, move on, move on... :)

Sadworld23 · 01/06/2025 07:08

Voted YANBU as I think its reasonable to be embarrassed by this.
He sounds like the sort of chap that enjoys that type if attention and therefore he's probably not for you.
He's not a bad person for it, but attention seekers aren't everyone's cup of tea.

BrickBiscuit · 01/06/2025 07:42

Evilspiritgin · 01/06/2025 00:43

Add the fact she more or less gave him the go ahead,

she laughed then he said I can show you, then she said in the restaurant!!!

what did she expect to happen,

Show quote history

Not so. The difference is in the punctuation.

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