Woman yelled at me in public toilets

[empee47]

Went to Tesco yesterday and visited the loo. Washed my hands and turned on the hand dryer and another lady started yelling at me that I was upsetting her daughter because of the noise. Daughter looked to be about 3 and was visibly distressed. Had they asked me not to use the dryer until they’d left the sink area and explained why, I wouldn’t have done. Apparently I can’t possibly be a mum myself as everyone knows kids are scared of the noise. Happens that I have 2 kids myself and the noise has never bothered them. It was the aggressive way she was bellowing at me in public that annoyed me and the sense of entitlement that everything had to run her way.

YANBU
If her daughter struggles with noise, then that is up to her and her mum to sort... not members of the public.

It is better to wear slippers than expect the world to be carpeted.

Our son used to be scared of the noise,but i would never shout at anyone for it ,that would be my issue not theirs

Don’t worry about; it’s her problem not yours .

Ridiculous request.

Ridiculous woman.

My 9 year old has hated hand dryers since she was little. They used to make her cry. I never asked anyone else not to use them though. We just dry with tissues and scuttle out as fast as we can. She was unreasonable to shout at you.

When people are rude in an unjustified way, you can't help but feel wounded. She clearly has no issue ranting at a stranger in front of her child, which demonstrates what a vile individual she is. What example is she setting, no wonder her child was cowering. Sensitive to noise, tell mother to shut up.

My kids have auditory sensitivies and (possible SEN etc), handdryers are the utter worst and I have real problems even getting them in a communal toilet, let alone school toilets “blooming bl**dy toilets”. You have no idea. I’ve walked into toilets and they start and one of mine especially runs the other way, it literally makes them feel pain. Or we are in there and they run out as someone starts one up. Hands up sometimes when it is quiet and there are a couple I use family toilets or even once a disabled toilet with chants of my kids pleading me not to turn the handdryers on (I never do). Shopping, theme parks, them at school, it’s a different world. I have never shouted at anyone or actually I’ve never asked anyone not to use one.
I never expect anyone to not use them, yes they’re the bane of my life and have a little party in my head if they only have the very old quiet ones or paper towels (my kids have an excellent product knowledge of handdryers with Dyson Air Blades being the worst contender).
Once when on my own I asked a parent if it was ok to use them as she had a small child with them, she looked at me very oddly.

We grew up with paper towels or those rotating towels you used them pulled round for the next person, when they started to bring in handdryers they were slow, warm and quiet. Now they are fast, noisy and cold.

This woman you encountered was wrong, but she probably is at her wits end with those blasted contraptions.

She's nuts, entitled or both.

I agree with you, apart from labelling the mother a vile individual. Her behaviour perhaps. She likely learned that from her own mother of father.

When DS1 was small we always exited the toilets madly flapping our hands because he hated the hand dryers😅 People can be considerate and polite in general - holding doors open for the next person, queuing, lifting something off the top shelf etc - but they aren’t mind readers and they can’t mitigate for every possible situation. Even though my son hated the hand dryers, when he wasn’t with me, I just went ahead and used them, I wasn’t looking around to see if there was a potentially distressed child hanging about.

While I agree that that this woman was probably stressed, I don’t think people should be expected to accept rudeness from others just because there might be an underlying reason. Otherwise we should accept rudeness from all human beings all the time because they might be stressed/late/grieving/on their way to an interview etc. The default should be, in my view, to expect a basic level of manners from others.

Really!

No, she's being ridiculous. I have an autistic DS who's scared of the noise, we use the accessible toilets for that reason. I wouldn't anyone else to not go about their normal routine. Even if she'd gently asked while you were washing your hands, that would be ok, but she's just entitled.

Ridiculous.. my 4 yr old grandaughter washes drys her hands yeah its noisy but it just drys your hands.
Up to parent to parent her own child id of told her straight not to speak to me like that .

Ignore her. It's just a load of hot air 🙂